Cotton Girl
by FreyjaBee
Summary: Sometimes, the difference between what we want and what we fear is the width of an eyelash. Rated M for mature themes, sexual content, language, violence. (Romance, drama, angst, action for genre) Mature audiences only, please.
1. Chapter 1

_Fairy Tail belongs to Hiro Mashima_

 **Warnings** : Graphic depictions of violence, substance abuse, coarse language, sexual content. Multiple parings. It will be dark. Mature audiences only, please.

* * *

 ** _Cotton Girl_**

* * *

The man beneath Juvia dug his fingers into her hips and orgasmed. She could feel _everything._ His swelling body hitting her on all sides, his sweat under her palms. His panting breath as his chest rose and fell exaggeratedly to get his wind back. Spent herself, she collapsed against her partner's chest and just lay there, listening to his heart throb, the air rattle in his lungs, pleased with herself. He didn't pet her hair; he didn't caress her back. Juvia didn't want him to, either.

After a prolonged moment she lifted herself on shaking arms and pushed her messy hair back from her face. When she could see again she rose and wriggled her skirt back down around her hips.

"Thanks for the fun evening," she told the sprawled dragon slayer. He grunted noncommittally, which was as good as saying 'you're welcome' when you were trying to play it cool. He couldn't hide the way he puffed, or the way his fingers gripped at his wrinkled shirt as the aftereffects of his orgasm rolled through him. She ran her hands through her hair again and straightened the knotted tresses.

He glanced at her out of the corner of his eye and offered something he never had before. "You can stay, if you want."

Juvia looked over at him and considered his offer. They hadn't ever ventured down that road and she didn't know if she cared to. Sure, they could continue their good night if she let him rest for just a little while longer, but there was a certain ice mage she wanted to see before it got too late.

"I don't know why you even bother giving him any time, Juvia," he grumbled from the floor, seeing through her hesitance.

"Don't act like you care, you just want to fuck," she replied flippantly.

He raised a brow and flashed her pointed teeth. "Yeah? Isn't that what you want, too?"

Waiting for Gray was long and agonizing. _You can have a little bit of fun_ , she told herself. _This doesn't mean anything._ And it was true, she just used his body, closed her eyes, and imagined it was Gray-sama she was writhing over. And only felt a little guilty for it. "Goodbye," she said by way of answer.

"Yeah. Hey, I'll see you tomorrow when he turns you down again."

She rolled her eyes but didn't refute his claim. She didn't want to come back, but she would likely be knocking on his door again. She couldn't seem to help herself. He was no Gray-sama, but he did have a certain je ne sais quoi that she found herself drawn to. Still… she was stubborn to the last. "I know he loves me. He'll come around."

The dragon slayer gave her a pitying look. "If he does, he has a funny way of showing it."

She crossed her arms under her breasts. "You and I don't love each other, but here we are. People express things differently."

"No, we don't love each other." He pushed himself up on his elbow and winked a searing blue eye at her. "But we have fun. That frosty twit can't even say that. But whatever, if he doesn't want a piece of that," his eyes roved over her shamelessly, "I'm more than happy to take care of you."

At his words her body heated unbearably. She swallowed back the urge to go to him again, to see if he was hard once more, to kneel over him and push into his body. Her hands tingled with the effort. "How benevolent of you to agree to use me."

"Hey," he refuted, "You use me, too, and I don't complain."

It was true, she couldn't contradict that. "I have to go," she said again.

The dragon slayer smiled toothily. A small whip of power shot out from his body and smacked against her ass, tearing the fabric there. A splash of pale skin peeped through. Juvia squeaked and rubbed the tender area. "Careful," she complained, but her words had no heat behind them—in fact, they slipped out as an aroused purr. He knew just how to get to her. Love or no love, they worked well together.

"Come here and tell me that," he challenged.

Juvia glanced over at the door, then to the darkening sky. "But…"

He wasn't listening. He was massaging his hand quickly over his erection and watching her brazenly.

Juvia licked her lips, her protest dying. It wasn't actually that late, she could stay a little longer.

* * *

The night was warm, crickets sang cheerfully as Gray Fullbuster walked past Fairy Hills, Juvia on his mind. He hadn't seen the water mage all day, which was unusual, and when he went by her apartment, it was still and quiet.

He held a piece of paper tightly in his hand—a job request specifically for him and Juvia. He would have normally turned it down, but the reward was very, very high, and the job itself sounded interesting. The destruction of a nest of mountain lindworm's was an easy thing. It wouldn't even take them that long, a day, tops. It could be done by tomorrow night, but Juvia had been shockingly absent. At this rate, he was going to have to turn it down or try to take it on himself—which he was sure he _could_ do, but didn't relish taking a job on his own. That was boring. Juvia could be sort of obnoxious, but she was good company when she wasn't tripping over him.

As if summoned by thought, a familiar figure turned the corner, hair gleaming in the bright light of the moon, a sapphire jewel in the drawing night. She looked up and met his eyes. Her lips turned down in a frown for the barest of instances then she shook herself and her usual happy smile curled the corners of her mouth.

"Gray-sama!" She closed the distance between them, a bounce in her step.

"Hey, Juvia," he greeted. Her hair was mussed, her cheeks pinked, and her lips were shiny and pink, glossed by something artificial. She was beautiful standing there under the light of the moon. Not that he'd ever admit it to her for fear of the backlash that would follow. She was just too intense sometimes. "Where have you been?"

She looked away from him guardedly. "Just out."

"Oh." It was obvious she didn't want to talk about it. "I was looking for you."

She looked back at him, eyes lighting up. "You were?"

"We have a job request," he rushed to explain, not wanting her to get the wrong idea.

"A request?" she repeated. "For you and me?"

He nodded.

"And you _want_ to do it… together?" There was a note of hope in her voice.

"Well," he fielded, sensing her rising pleasure. "It pays well, and I thought that we could knock it off quickly."

She grinned toothily. "I would love to go out on a job with you, Gray-sama."

He thought to protest, to tell her that his offer didn't mean anything—or at least, not what she _thought_ it meant—but as soon as he saw that smile he lost the words. Maybe it did mean something, what the hell did he know?

"Alright. We'll leave tomorrow then."

Juvia nodded. "I'll be ready." She came forward and kissed his cheek noisily before he could pull away. "Goodnight, Gray-sama!"

Gray watched her flounce away, mind churning, cheek burning.

* * *

Inside her apartment, Juvia rushed to her window so she could watch Gray mosey down the path towards his home. He looked alone out there, but not lonely. Not like she was. Thoughts swirling, she gnawed on a nail and listened to her heart pound.

 _This is it,_ she told herself. Either this job would allow their love to grow or it would wither and die. The latter prospect made her chest feel tight. _He's already asked you to go, that's a big step_ , she told herself but then shook her head. It wasn't enough. She needed something _more_ , and had for a long, long time.

She undressed, hands sliding over the small welt her dragon slaying partner had left on her ass with that slap of magical energy and smiled. It would be terrible if Gray never returned her love, but she wouldn't be lonely.


	2. Chapter 2

The next morning saw Juvia up too early, but she needed the extra time. Not to shower or do her makeup—that took just as long as ever—but to pack. The ordeal left her standing in her towel for nearly an hour while she pulled outfits out of drawers and threw them on the bed in the 'keep' pile. Each time she'd think, _yeah, Gray-sama is sure to like that_ , only to decide a split second later that it was all _wrong_.

In the end she decided to take almost _everything._ That seemed to be the only way to satisfy her fickle mind. She dressed quickly after that, pulling on her favorite blue halter top, the one with the little yellow bow, a pleated white skirt, and a pair of tall, soft black leather boots. Then she set about cramming her wardrobe into her small blue polka dot suitcase.

* * *

Just as Gray was poised to knock a colourful stream of curses came from Juvia's room that had him both interested—Juvia didn't swear, not really—and slightly worried.

"Hey," he said as he grabbed the handle and pushed open the unlocked door. Inside was utter disarray. It took him a second to focus on the girl on her knees because he was so taken aback by the mess. So many clothes littered every surface it was hard to see if she had a bed under all that chaos.

Under a long blue dress, he caught sight of the top half of a stuffed doll and frowned. That head of messy black hair looked suspiciously like his own, but he didn't even _want_ to know. He moved his eyes away from there, trying to find Juvia in the disorder, and instead found a stash of intimates she had dug out of her drawer. His vision snagged on one article in particular, a racy black corset and thin G-string combo. His heart hammered as his mind put Juvia in that tiny scrap of fabric and then imagined her showing it off for him. He swallowed tightly.

"Gray-sama? Helloooo?"

He tore himself out of the fantasy and found the woman amongst the debris. "Juvia," he choked out.

"There you are." She had been trying to get his attention for several long seconds. "Gray-sama, why are you barging into Juvia's room?" There was a hopeful gleam in her eye that Gray didn't like. Seeing that helped distance him from his fantasy, which was a good thing, because all he had to do was look at her in her too-short skirt and too-low cut top and he was sweating again.

"I just... I heard you—sounded like you needed help," he finished lamely.

Juvia stood and came too close. "Yes? What does Gray-sama want to help me with?"

Gods, all that skin was distracting. She leaned into him, smelling like fresh rain and white sweet clover and he nearly groaned aloud. "You—"

"Yes?" She was close enough to breathe in his words.

"You need to change," he blurted.

"You want to help Juvia change?" She didn't even need to think about it, her hands were clutching the hem of her shirt and bullying the fabric up over her ribs in the span of a breath.

Gray let out a strangled cry. "No!" This woman would be the death of him. Thankfully she stopped before he could see what she wore beneath that slinky blue top. "Keep your damn clothes on while I'm in here." Wasn't he a hypocrite? "I just meant, we're going to be in the foothills of a mountain, where it'll be cold, so you'll want something a little... more."

Juvia let go of her shirt and looked both humiliated and crestfallen. "Oh."

He felt immediately terrible but couldn't bring himself to ask her to continue, though he so desperately wanted to see what was hidden below that shirt. "Yeah. I'll just... I'll wait outside. Hurry it up though. And don't bring so much stuff," he added as an afterthought when he realized she had been trying to stuff closed a bag filled with too much fabric. "Only take what you need." And then he felt like an even bigger dick because her whole neck turned red. He cleared his throat awkwardly and made a hasty retreat.

* * *

Juvia tried not to let that stuff bother her. She clung to the idea that he had _invited_ her out on this job—not only that, he had gone out of his way to tell her about it, but it was hard to feel excited when she felt so stupid. She sighed and went for a pair of galaxy print tights and shimmied out of her skirt. She left the halter top just where it was but grabbed a long sleeved shift for when they got into the higher altitudes. It was still summer in Magnolia and there was no way she was walking through the streets in a damned sweater until she had to.

She emptied out her bag as Gray had suggested, and it was a good thing too, because the zipper was just about to give up the ghost. When she unzipped it, shirts and panties went flying. She huffed and sorted out what she'd need, sticking with long pants and sweaters, though that was horribly boring. How was Gray-sama supposed to fall in love with a cotton ball? She grumbled and closed the bag, knowing she wouldn't even likely need what was in there.

She paused on the way out of her room, a black lingerie set catching her eye, and stuffed that in for good measure—a girl never knew when something like that may come in handy—and walked out into the hall.

Gray was leaning back against the wall, one foot brought up so the heel of his boot rested against the interior brick, shirt open, arms crossed over his bare chest. He spoke animatedly to Levy, who clutched her elbows and nodded along, raptly listening to his words. Watching them, Juvia realized that it was actually possible to feel even more despondent. She chewed on her lip and bit back the jealous words that came to her mind, knowing that Gray was already frustrated with her.

"Finally," he said when he saw her. "It's about time. We're going to be late now."

"Sorry, Gray-sama," she mumbled.

Gray hadn't meant for the words to come out quite like that, but apparently he was just racking them up today. He wouldn't apologize, though, they _were_ late. "Thanks for the tips, Levy," he told the small girl. "I'll make sure to freeze their nest before they can catch our scent."

Levy nodded. "I've never seen a mountain lindworm before—I've only ever read about them in books, but from what I know they're pretty poisonous."

Gray smiled, much to Juvia's chagrin, and held up his arm and tapped the black mark there—the mark of a devil slayer. Juvia knew it was perpetually cold and stretched across his body when he asked, increasing his power tenfold whenever he used magic. It was a mark made for killing demons, but regular creatures fell just as fast.

"I got this," the ice mage said confidently. "And I have Juvia here as my back up. Nothing can touch us." He slid a sideways glance at her to see if she'd frill with pride like he was expecting. She didn't. He tried to ignore the pang of guilt he felt and told himself he had done nothing wrong. The words didn't ring _exactly_ true, but true enough. "Alright, we have to get going. We're going to miss the train."

"Have fun, guys!" Levy called.

Juvia waved to the girl and fell into step beside Gray.

"You look good. Warmer," he said awkwardly.

Juvia sighed, taking the bad with the good. "Juvia is a cotton girl."

"What?" He scratched his head, confused.

"The cold never bothered me," she said, ignoring his question. She didn't want to explain—it had slipped out without her permission.

Gray shrugged. "It's going to be pretty frigid up there—you'll thank me later."

She doubted it, but kept silent.

* * *

They missed the train, as Gray had feared, and had to wait another two hours for the next one to arrive. In the meantime, Gray suggested they share a small milkshake, just to see Juvia light up. He wasn't disappointed when she smiled for the first time in hours. Wasn't that worth the assumptions she was going to make?

As they passed the sweet treat back and forth at the train station he watched her drink, her dark lips moving and her pale throat bobbing as she sucked on the straw. There was an instant where he imagined leaning forward and laying a soft kiss at the corner of her mouth, where he wanted to flick his tongue out and taste the milkshake from her lips, but he quickly admonished those thoughts.

It wasn't that he didn't like her—he did, too much, he may just add, that was becoming more and more apparent the longer he hung around her—no, the issue was something else entirely, something he couldn't seem to run from, something he couldn't seem to ignore, no matter how hard he tried.

* * *

Port Dover was a small coastal town with a large shipping port flanking its eastern boundaries and a huge, towering mountain to the north. They arrived late. Not only did they miss their first train, but they got delayed because there was a group of thieves that robbed the train ahead of them. The two Fairy Tail wizards offered assistance in catching them, but the conductor was sure to tell them that it wasn't an issue, the king had already hired a group of mages to take care of the bandits and they were just held up because they were finishing their preliminary investigation. It was nearly nightfall before they got moving again.

The mayor of Port Dover, one Arthur Moody, met them at the train station and accepted their apologies. He was a short, rotund man with a balding cap of wispy gray hair. His exposed skull was shiny in the false light of the train station. He pushed round glasses up on his nose and peered at the two mages. "You won't want to be travelling to the mountain at night, those lindworms will tear you apart. I'll rent you a hotel and cover the cost for your troubles. One room?"

Juvia opened her mouth to respond but Gray beat her to the punch. "Two, please, if it's not a problem." A night close to her knowing that if he asked she'd give him anything he wanted was just… no.

Arthur nodded. "Of course, whatever you need. I'll make the call just as soon as we're done here. You'll be staying at the Waterfront Hotel over on Greenly Avenue. That seems to be a popular spot for mages."

Juvia ignored the way her heart hurt. "Thank you," she told him. "This was very kind of you."

"Not at all, young lady, it's the least I can do after that business with the trains. How humiliating, as if Port Dover is a place for thieves and renegades."

Gray gave him a stiff smile. "That's alright."

"It is certainly not. But, it will be, once they're caught. To get to your hotel follow this road North. You can't miss Greenly Avenue. It's a left from there."

"Thanks," Gray replied. "Come on, Juvia, I want to get an early start tomorrow."

Juvia waved to Mr. Moody and fell into step beside Gray. "Do you think the thieves are still in the area?"

"Baldy over there must," Gray replied. "And it makes sense. Where else would they go? This is the only town for miles, and it has access to the ocean. It's likely that they'll try to take their stash and cross to the other continent, sell whatever they stole over there so we can't trace it."

Juvia kept a sharper eye on their surroundings.

* * *

The Waterfront Hotel was a large, pale brick building with a flower garden out front and a small fountain. It was nice—not over the top but clean, crisp and new-looking. Port Dover was a town that cared about its tourism; the evidence was in every corner, down to the weed-less cobblestone, the graffiti-less streets, the emptied garbage cans.

Gray went first up the walk, grabbing the door to the hotel and pulling it wide for Juvia. She skirted in past him and took in the building. Stretching marble floors, suited bellhops, and bronze elevators that dinged non-stop. The place was packed for mid-week in the middle of summer.

A bellhop ambled forward. "Sir, madam. You're the mages from Fairy Tail?"

"Yes," Juvia agreed.

"Allow me to take your bags to your room while you check in." He held out his hand patiently while they handed over their possessions.

"Thanks," Gray called.

At the front desk, a man wearing a gray suit and red tie checked them in and gave them key cards with their room numbers stamped on front, telling them, "The twenty second floor."

Juvia walked shoulder-to-shoulder to the elevators with Gray and pretended that they weren't working. Her fingers itched to slip into the crook of his arm, but she didn't dare, not yet brave enough for that.

"It's a nice hotel, isn't it, Gray-sama?"

"Hm?" he asked, distracted. "Yeah."

Juvia grinned. "Maybe you and I can stay for a little when we're done with this job."

He didn't say yes, but he didn't say no, either. The elevator arrived, dinging loudly. The doors opened with a whoosh. The water mage stepped in beside Gray, a wide smile on her face, and prepared for the ride. The machine's doors closed, then they soared skywards so fast that Juvia's stomach was left behind. When it stopped her legs felt heavy. She shook them out and stepped into their hallway as soon as the doors opened and turned to see Gray doing the same.

"Are you sure you don't want to stay with me tonight, Gray-sama?" she tried, not quite ready to let him slip away.

There was a moment where Gray hesitated. Juvia's heart hammered and she listened fixedly for his word of agreement.

And then he shook his head and her heart plummeted. "Are you sure? We could get room service to bring up some champagne and—"

"We're on a job, Juvia. We can't go drinking and staying up all night just because we can," Gray said. "You know that. Get some sleep, I'll see you in the morning."

Juvia sighed. He was right, of course, but that didn't mean she wasn't disappointed.

Her room was three doors down from Gray's. She watched him disappear into his before she did the same, wanting another moment to see the broadness of his shoulders and the hardness of his jaw, to enjoy looking at the man who didn't want her back. And then he was gone. He didn't even spare her a second glance.

She opened the door with more force then necessary and slammed it closed at her back. Inside, the room was large—the mayor hadn't spared any expense. She had a queen sized bed, a huge shower, a view of the ocean and, when she opened the fridge, a stocked mini-bar, but she couldn't find it within herself to enjoy the luxury.

Her bag was there waiting for her on the bed. She pulled out a pair of comfortable shorts and a tank top and got ready for bed.

She was just pulling her hair into a high ponytail when a knock sounded on the door. Her heart leapt into her throat, thinking immediately that it was Gray. She dismissed the idea a heartbeat later; the universe never provided quite like that.

But… if it wasn't Gray-sama… who else could it be?

 _Has to be._

She tore open the door and wasn't disappointed. Gray stood there dressed in dark pants, the waist band slung low around his hips so she could see the dipping V of his body, and no shirt. His ever-present cross hung between his pectorals, flashing silver every time he breathed. She licked her lips excitedly, hectic colour rising in her cheeks. "Gray-sama." His name came out as a squeak. She cleared her throat and tried for casual indifference. "I thought you didn't want to hang out with Juvia tonight?"

Gray blew out a breath, rattled. He could nearly see through that shirt she wore. "I – I didn't…"

Juvia caught him looking at her and tried for sultry vixen, leaning against the wall and giving him her best 'take my clothes off' expression she could muster.

If discomfort was what she was going for, she hit the nail directly on the head. Gray sweated and stammered and clutched something tightly in his hand. Her eyes dropped to where he held a familiar looking white pouch. Her pouch of creams and makeup and other ah… lady things, to be exact.

"I think this is yours," Gray said when he realized she had noticed and brandished the bag clumsily. He held it loosely between his thumb and forefinger and Juvia knew he had looked inside, which was mortifying enough, but topped with how silly she now felt… she was near tears.

She snatched it from his hand, her happiness rapidly deflating. "This is why you came over?"

"It must have fallen out of your bag, I thought you'd want it back," Gray said, scrubbing a hand through his hair.

"That's it?"

This felt like a trap. "Yes?"

Juvia sighed. "Goodnight, Gray."

He noted the absence of 'sama' and was at first relieved. And then realized the trouble it spelled for him. It had most certainly been a trap. "Wait, Juvia—"

But she was already closing the door. "I can't even look at you right now."

Oh yes. It was the trap to end all traps. The biggest trap a trapper could use to trap unsuspecting men. And he had fallen directly into the pit, though for the life of him he couldn't see _why_. It was only a dumb makeup bag.

Gray stopped the door with his hand. "Wait, Juvia, if you're embarrassed about—" _Gods, shut up._ But he kept going. "—about the girl stuff, I know all about it. Ur was my teacher for a long time and—"

She groaned and tried to close the door harder. "Just shush. That has nothing to do with this!" Nothing much, anyway.

Then he was lost. "What did I do?" He thought he was a pretty smart guy, but right now he felt dumb as a cattail.

Juvia snorted, anger rising, and shot a short, cold stream of water from her palm. It hit him square in the chest and pushed him back enough that she could close the door on his wild stream of curses. She locked the deadbolt and leaned against the door, hearing Gray sputter then stomp off down the hall, still swearing.

The first tear fell in correspondence with a drop of rain outside. She pushed away the unwelcomed wetness and clomped to the bed where she lay down but couldn't even think about sleep. Not only that, she was so upset her body was trying to lose its solidness. She felt like more water than girl. She sniffled.

The door sounded again.

Juvia stiffened and thought to ignore it, but knuckles rapped more sharply against the hard wood and she ground her teeth together, suddenly furious. If Gray wanted to come back and fight, she'd tell him exactly how she felt, how long she'd waited and how frustrated she was with him. She still loved him and it was because of that love she would be willing to give him a chance to choose if he wanted to walk away from her forever or if he wanted to get serious. Whatever his answer was, she'd respect it. It was a simple thing, yes or no. Either way, she'd be free.

She stalked to the door and ripped it open. "Get in here Gray, you and I need to ta—" her words petered off.

He leaned against her door casually, mouth tipped into a slightly feral grin, blue eyes snapping over her body so quickly she fought the urge to cover her breasts. There was no doubt what was on his mind as he took her in. Filthy, raucous things. Things that had her blood pumping and her breath quickening and he hadn't even said hello.

"Sting…"

"Am I interrupting something?" He dropped his hand into the pocket of his pants and crossed his one foot behind the other.

Juvia squirmed, loving the way he could just seem to lounge anywhere, looking casually sexy and unbearably hot. "Interrupting?" She was slow on the upkeep, still trying to discern what he was doing there.

"Yeah, where's your too-cool-for-school icicle boy?" His fangs flashed.

Reality came crashing back. "He's not here."

If Sting noticed the change in her demeanor, he didn't let on, the grin was perpetually glued to his lips. "Mmhm. Is he _going_ to be here?"

Juvia squirmed, swiped away a stray tear and shook her head. "N—no."

He nodded and stood up straight. "Turned you down again, huh?"

"Shut up, dick." He was hot, sure, but he was also an ass. She had no fear of telling him so. It wasn't Sting that she loved—well, she supposed she loved _parts_ of him. His smile, his eyes, his hands, which were grabbing her shoulders and promptly bullying her into the room. He closed and locked the deadbolt with a sure flick of his wrist and turned back to her, all teeth and hot fingers.

"You know what I think?" His hands were on her waist dipping into the waist band of her shorts.

She didn't, obviously. She licked her lips nervously. "What?"

"I think he's an idiot, but that's okay, because he can keep fucking up. That just means more of you for me."

He crept closer, touch drawing fire from her body. Juvia took a step backwards, excitement starting slow and low in her belly. The anger and ache were gradually fading. This is what Sting was good for, forgetting, and wanting, and fun. There was no pain when they were together. It was easy to be with him. She wanted him, he wanted her back and neither one of them expected anything like love. It worked for them both.

She bumped against the wall at her back. Sting came in close and took her hair out of its ponytail then dropped the tie somewhere on the ground. "I like you better with your hair down." His voice sent chills over her skin. She shimmied against him, a small purr escaping her lips. He pressed his nose against her neck and breathed deeply, taking in her scent, her arousal and the faint traces of hurt that still clung to her. "You smell good."

Juvia allowed herself to close her eyes and touch him, skimming her hand over the flesh at his waist. "You didn't tell me what you were doing here."

"And if I said I came just to see you?" She felt him smile against her throat and knew he lied.

"That's crap."

He nipped her. "You're right, finding you here was just a happy coincidence. We got a job request to catch some thieves that robbed a train earlier." He ran his tongue over her throat from the junction at her shoulder all the way up to the hollow under her ear. Juvia resisted the urge to melt, though she did sway into him and felt he was hard already.

It was hard to focus. "It was Sabretooth that got that request?"

"Mmhmm." He brushed over the peaks of her breasts with his thumbs and smiled when her nipples hardened through the thin material of her tank top.

Juvia caught her breath and clutched his biceps. They were rock hard and solid under her hands. She loved the way he felt. "Then what are you doing here? The master of Sabretooth shouldn't be going out on low-level jobs like this."

He squeezed her harder until she gasped and rocked her hips into his. "Performance reviews," he said simply. "Part of being master."

The ache in her heart was all but buried. "I think Juvia likes that you're master," she said.

He kissed her neck, using his tongue to tease out a gasp. "Yeah?' He abandoned her breasts and groped her ass.

"Yes." Her mind whirled.

"Would you do as I say, Juvia?"

"Yes." Sometimes, anyway.

"Then master says get your fucking clothes off."

Juvia peeped when he smacked her ass playfully and rushed to obey, the place between her legs well and truly aching now. Sting watched her undress, eyes clinging to her figure unabashedly. She tried to wrap her arm around her breasts when she noticed, but he pushed her hand aside.

"Don't cover up."

"But—"

He wasn't interested in listening to the rest. He cut her words off with a frenzied kiss, drinking her down and enjoying every moment of it. When she stopped trying to talk, he slid his mouth away from hers and kissed down her neck again. Juvia's cool hands found the button of his pants. She tugged at his belt expertly having done so many times before, and mewled happily when it came undone. She slid down the wall out of his grasp and took him into her mouth, loving the way he moaned, fisted his hands in her hair and used her just as much as she used him. She worked him with her tongue until he grunted and was just about to orgasm then pulled away.

"You're a tease," he panted.

Juvia smiled. "I know."

Sting growled, bent down and lifted her bodily from the ground by her elbow. When she was at least semi-erect, he elevated her the rest of the way by the hips and bullied his way between her legs so she had to wrap them around his body tightly. He could feel she was hot and ready for him. "Lucky for you, I like that."

"Do you think Gray-sama will be mad if he finds out we're doing this?" Juvia asked suddenly.

Sting grinned. "If that means I get you a little longer, I fucking hope so." He wrapped an arm tightly around her waist and slid inside. Juvia gasped his name in just the way he liked and pulled frantically at his hair. He pushed her hard against the wall and helped her forget her hurt.

* * *

 **…..**

 **…..**

 **OMG.**

 **This fucking story is fluffy. What the hell, me? Just… what the hell?**

 **Maybe I hate it. It's going up anyway, though, because… It represented a turning point in my writing. Hallelujah.**


	3. Chapter 3

Sting pulled Juvia's hair roughly and bit her neck while his other hand worked between her legs, fingers sliding in small, tight circles. Still buried inside, he felt her body tighten around his and knew she was just about to come. He thrust his hips twice more and that was enough; Juvia's breath snagged and a long, low sob slipped from her lips. They came together, her body still securely wrapped around his, her shoulders pressed into the wall. He kissed her to prolong the moment, wanting to taste her pleasure. Her tongue was surprisingly cool but her lips were hot. She quivered and moaned in just that way he liked.

It was difficult but he drew away a moment later and helped her slide to the ground where she teetered and trembled. Sting wiped a bead of sweat from his brow and grinned, pleased with his work. "You gonna ask me to stay the night now?"

Juvia stammered. "Here? With me?"

He laughed. "Relax, I was kidding. I know how much this secret means to you."

She made herself bend and snatch her shirt from where it was thrown to the floor. Her legs felt like they could give way at any moment. "It's not that," she lied. "I have to leave early tomorrow morning."

"Yeah? It has nothing to do with hiding from frozen toes over there?" He hiked a thumb in the direction of Gray's room.

Juvia steamed. " _You're_ the one that sneaks me in through the secret entrance at Sabretooth. Who are _you_ trying to hide from?"

His smile didn't falter the way she wanted it to. "You want to come in through the front door like a proper lady? Want me to show you off, tell everyone you're my girl?"

Juvia flushed. "We don't have that kind of relationship." And she didn't want it, either. She wanted Gray-sama.

" _I_ know that, you're the one balking on me, Juvia. If you don't want to keep it up just say the word, we'll make a clean break." He was pulling his pants up over his hips, his smile only now dimming, a note of seriousness creeping in.

She grabbed her shorts and stepped into the leg holes clumsily, flustered and frustrated. "Shut up, you know I don't want to stop." She'd die if she did. Without Sting in her life, it was a lot of late, dissatisfied nights thinking about Gray. Now… well, she still thought about him, but there was a lot less frustration.

When she chanced a look at his face, the smirk was back, a gleam in his eye. He liked it when she got feisty. "That's good, because I don't know if I'd just let you sneak away."

It was nice to be wanted. She tried a smile. It almost felt real. "Oh?"

He came in closer, his eyes getting smoky again. Juvia suppressed a shiver. "I don't think so." He captured her mouth and kissed her until her cool hands played in the hair at the nape of his neck. He pulled away long enough to stoop and grab her by the thighs, lift her high and carry her to the bed.

Juvia cried out and grasped his shoulders tightly. "What are you doing?"

"You drive me crazy." His voice was a low, dangerous growl.

She shivered.

Sting dropped her to the bed unceremoniously and grabbed her shorts. He had them yanked down around her ankles before she could formulate a protest, then came in for another, slow kiss. Juvia closed her eyes and let it happen.

* * *

Gray walked down the hallway, head bent, a bottle of champagne in one hand and two tall glass flutes in the other. His guts twisted painfully. He didn't feel good about this, but thought he had an idea of how important spending some time together had been to Juvia. He didn't want her to look at him like that, with hurt and accusation in her eyes. Every time he thought about the way she snatched that stupid bag from his hands he felt a little lower. He knew she had wanted him to stay, knew she had been trying and trying to get his attention for years. _What the fuck is wrong with you, man_? But he knew what was wrong.

He didn't think he could do it, be with her like that…

He clutched the bottle tighter. _Nothing has to happen, you can just go have a few drinks like she wanted, and then you can go your own separate ways_. But he didn't know if that was a possibility. He was always careful around Juvia. She got to him—more than he liked—wriggled under all of his guards and proposed wild situations designed to beat him down a few pegs, throw him off his game, wrangle him into a situation that was not only impossible but sure to end in heartache.

He sighed and nearly turned around, walked back downstairs and gave up that stupid bottle, but then he remembered the way the sky had opened up outside and knew she was crying. Or had been. The clouds had cleared some time ago, for which he was horribly glad. He didn't want to see her cry and he certainly didn't want to be the cause of it, either. And so, he had hatched some harebrained idea to get some champagne and go to her room like she had suggested. They could _probably_ leave a little later the next morning. It wasn't like the lindworms cared exactly _when_ their nests got destroyed—they'd be more concerned with their general demise, he was sure. It wasn't like they had a date for afternoon tea that they were going to be late for.

A door closed loudly, breaking Gray from his reverie. He lifted his head and was surprised to see Sting Eucliffe sauntering down the hall, a wide, cocky grin on his face.

"Sting… what are you doing here?"

The dragon slayer beamed. "Lookie who it is." He sniggered as if at some private joke. "Just taking care of some things." His eyes dropped to the champagne in Gray's hand. The ice mage immediately felt self-conscious but there was nothing for it. He shrugged off the slayer's gaze, determined to let him draw whatever conclusions he wanted.

Though he still bristled when Sting snorted. "Gone to win over your girl?"

Gray felt heat crawling up his neck and knew he spoke of Juvia. "She's not mine."

"Yeah, less then you know. Hey, don't try too hard, alright?" He smirked and clapped Gray hard on the back.

Sting's words were barbed and full of a double meaning that went beyond his understanding. "What's that supposed to mean?"

The blonde dragon slayer shrugged and kept on walking, hands stuffed into his pockets, a tune whistled through pursed lips. Gray frowned, wondering what he had missed. It had been something, to be sure.

He blew out an irritated breath and decided to forget about it for now. It was getting late. He screwed up his courage and closed the distance to Juvia's door where he knocked briskly and waited for her to answer. The door opened a moment later and Juvia peaked out through a small crack. Her hair was dishevelled and her cheeks were pinked.

"I don't think I can anymore, St—" She clamped her lips together when she realized it was Gray at her door. "Gray—"

He waited for the 'sama' that never came and felt selfish for it. "Hey." He tried for sheepish and was rewarded by a soften glint in her eye. "What were you saying?"

"Oh… um… room service," she mumbled pathetically. "What are you doing here?" She pushed back the hair from her face, feeling frenetic and caught red-handed, though she was sure he would have said something by now…

"Oh."

"So? Why are you here?" Juvia hardened her voice and tried not to get emotionally involved. It was difficult. She loved him, cool demeanor, stubbornness, indifference, threadbare patience and all. She thought she hated him, too, maybe just a little.

Gray held up the bottle of champagne like a peace offering. "I tracked down one of the hotel staff and thought maybe you and I could knock a few back, chill out—"

Juvia bit a warbling lip and stiffened her resolve. "I'm furious with you."

He sighed. "I know."

"You do?" She peaked at him from under a fringe of hair, looking for any note of insincerity or obliviousness. There was only contriteness in his eyes.

"Come on, let me in." He tried to step in past her but Juvia held up a hand to halt his progress.

"Um…." Her room was a mess. Torn apart, the blankets bunched at the foot of the bed, her bag of clothes strewn across the ground. The guilt returned fast and hard, feeling like a stone in the pit of her stomach. "Maybe not tonight…"

"Come on, Juvia," Gray said, fighting with panic. She couldn't turn him away. "I had to go through like, four people to get this champagne. Let's just have a drink and then we'll call it a night." He didn't want to have to beg. "Please?" But he would. Or nearly.

"I thought you wanted to get up early tomorrow?" She stubbornly clenched her jaw. _You're mad at him. You're mad at him. You're mad at him._ And she was, but that anger had a chance to soften, its blunt edge worn down.

"I… the lindworms can wait a few hours," he tried.

Juvia hesitated.

He could tell she was wearing thin. He chewed on his tongue and made himself reach forward to grab her fingers. Juvia jumped as if he had electrocuted her but she didn't pull away. "Come on. I never…" Apologizing was _hard._ "I never meant to make you upset. I'm sorry for, you know. That stuff."

A watery apology at best.

"That was weak." She pulled away from his grasp though it felt like it cost her something to do it. She liked the coolness of his skin, the strength of his fingers.

 _You're mad._

 _Right._

Gray cleared his throat uncomfortably. "I know it sucked." He pushed his hair back from his forehead and tried, "You know what I mean."

The sad part was that she did. "Fine," she said but added a concession. "But we have to go to your room."

"Mine? But we're right here—"

Juvia was already bullying him back and slipping through the door, making sure to keep it as closed as possible to avoid awkward questions. "You're room," she said with finality.

He groaned. "Fine, whatever."

As she closed the door at her back she wondered what Gray would think if he knew Sting was _just_ in her room? That he had spent the better part of the last hour and a half kissing her and touching her? Would he be jealous? Would he be furious? Would he feel betrayed? Did they even have _that_ kind of relationship? She thrust her fingers through her hair, feeling slightly mad.

Gray gave her a cautious look. "Are you alright?"

Juvia sobered and nodded, then walked fast, desperate to get inside. Gray had to hurry to catch up, feeling too far out of his depth. _What are you doing,_ he thought again and wondered if he could possibly turn her away without hurting her feelings or insulting her.

He couldn't.

Especially after he dragged her out of her room. He grumbled silently and brandished his key. When the door opened Juvia entered first. She looked at his bed, where the sheets were mussed and turned down, and felt like an even bigger traitor.

"I saw Sting on my way to your place, eh?" Gray said, setting down the two glasses and fighting with the top of the bottle. He always hated opening these damn things.

Juvia swallowed. Could he read her mind? No. He was amazing, but certainly not a mind reader. "Sting?" His name dropped weakly from her lips, a squeak if she'd ever heard one. _Do better than that,_ she scolded herself, but couldn't. When indifference failed, ignorance was the best card she had and she was going to play it until her luck ran out.

"From Sabretooth," Gray replied, oblivious. The top of the bottle exploded off and hit the ceiling. Juvia squawked and jumped, feeling edgy and out of sorts. Gray gritted his teeth and wished he had thought to do this over the balcony or in the bathroom because now sticky sweet liquid was pouring all over the floor. He put his mouth to the bottle and sucked back what he could, the bubbles trying to go up his nose. He sputtered a moment later, but the liquid stopped trying to erupt. "What do you think he was doing here? He was being pretty cryptic."

Juvia's hands shook. "You talked to him?"

"Yeah, he was coming down this hall. I guess he's staying here."

"I—I don't know."

"Do you think that they were the guild the king hired to catch those bandits?" Gray _tched_ depreciatively. "Fairy Tail is better; I don't know why the king would go with those losers."

"Sabretooth is good, too," she said automatically and then felt her cheeks heat. ' _I think Juvia likes that you're master.'_ Her words came back to haunt her and she shivered involuntarily, misery warring with mild arousal.

"Yeah, sure they are," Gray agreed and handed her a glass of bubbling liquid. "But we're better."

"Sure." She trailed off, thoughts whirling. "Gray—" She stopped herself from saying 'sama' with great difficulty. It was an automatic thing, but she wanted him to _know_ that she didn't just come for free. "Would you be furious with Juvia for being with another man?"

"What?" How was he supposed to answer that?

"You know… if I were to…" She shrugged. "What if I maybe didn't _love_ someone, but was with them?"

Gray looked at her quizzically. "Why would you be with someone you didn't love?" But he understood, had had a few fun nights of his own. "I don't know," he said finally when she just blinked dolefully at him. "You're not attached to anyone." He waited for the outburst that never came then continued cautiously. Juvia was like a hot geyser lately and he was always saying the wrong things. "I mean, I don't think anyone would blame you for eh… stretching your legs." _Stretching your legs? Seriously? And you're a right fucking liar, aren't you?_ Because, as much as he tried to ignore it, he hated the idea of Juvia being with someone else.

"Well, I don't want to know what anyone else thinks—would _you_ care?" It was hard being so bold when he had just recently rejected her.

"Well I mean… I—I don't know—"

Juvia rolled her eyes at his floundering. "Because, I've been pretty patient with you, Gray—" there was that gods be damned _sama_ again. She gritted her teeth.

"Juvia, I don't think this is a good time to have this discussion," he cut her off.

She looked at him, eyes glinting like a stormy ocean. He was back in the danger zone faster than he could say 'mayday'.

"This is the _only_ time I can have it with you," she said. Somehow she had gotten close to him. "I'm sick of being treated like your… well, I don't even know!" And that was the problem. He could be hot and cold, but mostly just frigid. "So I want you to think on this." She sucked up all the courage she could muster and moved in too close, pushing him back with a hand on his chest so he hit the wall and had nowhere to run. She then stood on tiptoe and met his lips in a desperate, too wild kiss. He tasted like alcohol and something sweet, and not exactly as she'd imagined. She didn't even give herself a second to enjoy it, not really, it was a little strange and fast for that, but she pressed against him, forced his mouth apart with hers, kissed him like she meant business and then promptly pushed away.

Her chest rose and fell too quickly to hide her franticness, the courage it had taken her to do even that… Juvia cleared her throat. "That's what you'd be giving up. Think about it." She put her half-drunk champagne glass down on the bedside table so hard the delicate stem cracked and broke. Alcohol spewed down the edge of the dark wood and puddled into the carpet. "Sorry." And then as an afterthought, "And sorry for getting you wet earlier, but you deserved it."

Gray had a sort of stricken look on his face. He was so rooted in place he couldn't even open his mouth to formulate a reply.

Juvia harrumphed, full of nervous and brazen energy and stomped out of his room, feeling for one second in charge of the situation. It wasn't until she was out in the hallway that she let out a anxious bubble of manic laughter, hardly able to believe she had been so bold, or that Gray had even let her get in that close. She wanted to go back, to apologize and ask him if he liked it, but knew it had been a sloppy, fraught kiss, full of want and desperation and very little else.

She scurried back to her room, eager for the protection it offered, though everywhere she looked it was a reminder that she had been with Sting just a short time before.

Juvia Lockser was a mess.

She tried not to listen for Gray's knock on her door, told herself not to expect it, but it still smarted when twenty minutes turned into an hour, and that into two and still he didn't show. She hadn't expected an answer right away, but it would have been nice. It would have been an easy decision for her if their positions were reversed, but then she remembered her words to Sting just the day before. ' _He loves me, I know it. People express things differently.'_

She nearly believed it, too.

Finally, she calmed enough to go to bed. Her sleep was fitful.


	4. Chapter 4

In all the times Gray had dared to imagine kissing Juvia, it never, _ever_ went like that. She wasn't furious with him in his fantasies, and maybe he was being selfish and childish, but he imagined more… not worship, because that made him sound like a colossal dick, but…. Well, more happiness, for one, less pain, more choice and less ultimatum, more of a chance to kiss her back and less of a 'hey, so this is happening and I'm going to pull away before you can figure out what the hell to do with yourself.' He swore that before this point in his life that he wasn't a dork, that when a girl kissed him he knew exactly what to do, but not Juvia.

He never knew what the fuck to do with her.

That sure didn't change as he stood there and tried to figure out if he was going to go to her or not, what it meant if he did—what that meant for them both in the future. How much would change if he agreed to go with her? Would she just be a girl that he kissed sometimes? Would she be a girl he came home to and told he loved? Would she be a girl that, providing they both lived that long, he could settle down and have a family with? Being a mage of Fairy Tail was tough these days—defeating Tartarus was proof enough of that. Everyone had lost so much, everyone had given it their all and yet no one had walked away unscathed.

Even if they could dodge the various random perils that seemed to lie in wait, there was his promise to eradicate E.N.D. He didn't imagine Zeref's strongest demon would just _let_ him walk up and destroy it, and he certainly didn't think Juvia would just _let_ him try to do it, either. No, she'd try to be by his side every single step of the way and that was a dangerous place to be. It was his experience that the people in his life that tended to stick around and get close to him never got the chance to live very long.

Logically he knew she was better off away from him. She would be safer, at least. She'd get the chance to walk away and live happily. He told himself that was okay. He was prepared to give up everything to stamp out Zeref's influence on this world. The man that had taken everything… would have everything stripped of him as well if Gray had anything to say about it.

His devil slayer mark pulsed as if in cheerful agreement. That expanding coldness was enough to allow for some sanity to creep in. He couldn't be with Juvia. It wasn't right and it wasn't fair. But hell, he enjoyed her kiss even if it was the most ephemeral, hurt-filled thing he had ever tasted.

That's what made it beautiful.

* * *

The next morning dawned in a cloudy haze. Juvia's eyes felt like they were filled with sharp, prickly sand when she finally pried them open. She lay in bed for as long as she dared and tried not to think about Gray, about his absence last night, about what it meant. There might still be time for him to say he wanted her. It was that thought alone that gave her the energy to roll out of bed and stumble into the washroom.

She glanced in the mirror and wished that she hadn't. Dark bags lay under her eyes and her cheeks were too pale. She tried not to feel too despondent as she turned away from her distraught self and climbed into the shower. She stood under the spray for a solid ten minutes trying to wake up enough to wash her hair, only really getting motivational when the water started turning from hot to cold. For all her boisterousness, the cold bothered her a little when it wasn't Gray's ice making her that way.

Ten teeth-chattering minutes later, Juvia was dried, dressed and packed for the road. She pulled at the bottom of a light blue tank top, dragging its edge down over her dark jeans and worried if Gray would like it, then admonished herself for thinking about that at all. She avowed to wipe him from her mind for as long as she could that morning, though, admittedly, that wasn't going to be very long at all. Soon they'd be leaving together for a trip into the foothills and they'd have no one but each other for company.

This was going to be an awkward excursion. She worried at her lip, wondering if she'd gone too far last night, if she shouldn't have kissed him, if she should have waited until they were back at home and they didn't have to look at each other with words of rejection between them.

 _Why are you so sure he's going to turn you down_?

She never thought she was horrible before, but her self-esteem was slowly being worn away. Before she could never imagine a world where Gray casted her aside, but now that's all she saw.

 _Sting thinks you're attractive,_ a traitorous internal voice chirped. _You could have him, if you wanted._ But she didn't _love_ Sting. Not like she loved Gray.

Juvia blew out an aggravated breath and took to the hallway. She thought about getting Gray but then discovered that she was far too cowardly for that. Let him find her in the lobby.

She forwent the death-defying elevator and took the stairs instead, eager to put some distance between herself and her nighttime misadventures.

She didn't get too far.

When she opened the door downstairs, Sting stood against the interior wall, facing the stairwell exit as if waiting for her. He grinned and her heart skipped that same old beat it always did when he was near. It wasn't fair, the effect he had on her. She wished she could totally ignore it, and would have too, but it had been a long time since a man had paid her so much mind, had looked at her with so much heat…

She flushed and debated ignoring him, but he broke away from the wall and came to her as if expecting her to do such a devious thing. Sting Eucliffe was not a man that enjoyed being ignored and he let her know with a flash of annoyance in his blue eyes.

"I was going to come to your room."

Juvia's stomach twisted. She looked over her shoulder to see if Gray was anywhere around. He wasn't. "What made you stop?" She could have used him this morning with how miserable she was feeling.

"I saw lover boy last night toting a bottle of some bubbly and thought maybe you two managed to patch things up." He raised a brow in a silent question.

Juvia hated that she had to correct him. "Nothing quite so fantastic happened." Was it odd to be talking to a man she was sleeping with about convincing another to love her? Perhaps, but Sting was different, rough around the edges and unafraid to be unorthodox. Sometimes she felt like she desperately needed that.

"You look miserable." There was that ever present gleam of indifference in his eye, but under that was a small, smothered spark of concern that Juvia ignored. She needed Sting's pity least of all.

"I didn't know you cared so much," she said sarcastically.

He held up his thumb and index finger and squinted through a small space between the two. "Just a little."

"Yeah, about how long we can keep fucking around for." Why was she taking it out on him? Because she could. Because he was good for it.

He was unfazed by her bitchiness. In fact, it only seemed to instigate him. He snaked out a hand and wrapped it around her waist. "With a body like that, can you blame me?"

Juvia tried to push away; they weren't alone in that lobby, people looked on with curious expressions, questions on their lips. The dragon slayer didn't let her loose as she had been expecting. He kissed her right then and there, unmindful of the attention they garnered—or perhaps he was relishing, who knew with Sting? Either way, people were looking but pretending not to as he kissed her thoroughly, tongue exploring her mouth, nary a space between their bodies.

He drew back after too long together, pleased to see Juvia's pinked cheeks and glazed eyes. That's how he liked her best, muddled, confused, and on the verge of taking her clothes off if he asked. A low growl left his lips and he was just pulling her in for another mind-numbing kiss when the stairwell door opened and Gray Fullbuster walked into the lobby.

Their eyes met over Juvia's head of sapphire hair and there was an instant where Gray had been ready to dismiss him. And then his eyes landed on the water mage standing too close to his body.

"Stop that," Juvia was saying, unaware to their audience. She pushed ineffectively at Sting's chest, trying to get away, though admittedly not incredibly hard. She kind of liked when he took charge and kissed her so roughly, held her still and seemed to know exactly what she wanted and the way she wanted it without her ever having to say a word.

But something was different this time. When she gazed up into his eyes he wasn't looking at her. He had a sneer on his mouth that made him look savage and remote, not like the man that had been kissing her just seconds before.

"Sting?"

"Juvia?" Gray's voice sliced through her.

Her whole body went cold, her legs weakened, and she would have fallen over but Sting still had a hand wrapped around her middle.

 _Gods._ Juvia tried to pull away again but the dragon slayer only held her tighter. She didn't know what kind of game he was playing, but she was _not_ in. "Sting, let go."

"I don't think I want to," he replied coolly.

"Seriously, this isn't funny anymore," she said, panic rising. What was she supposed to say to Gray now? How could she possibly explain what kind of person she was? The kind that claimed she loved one man but kissed another? She moaned in trepidation and tried to wriggle free.

"No one's laughing," Sting replied. She searched his eyes and was met with a hard, no nonsense glint of steel there.

"What the hell are you _doing_?" Her voice was pinched out through a pinhole.

"Maybe I'm tired of fucking around, Juvia. Maybe you and me should get a little more serious."

Juvia started to hyperventilate. They weren't ever supposed to be anything more. They were supposed to keep their feelings and their desires separate. That was the deal.

Why was he pushing that away now?

The lobby had gone quiet.

Gray fumed, his whole body chilling. "She told you to let go."

"Gray," Juvia twisted in Sting's grasp and met his steely gaze. He was furiously mad. "Gray, it's—"

But she didn't get to finish. The whole lobby dropped in temperature as a thick, frozen hand appeared and wrapped solidly around Sting's middle. He finally let go of Juvia, a curse on his lips. His words were cut off when a thick finger folded over his mouth and suffocated the sound.

Juvia stumbled back a couple of steps and Gray grabbed her elbow to keep her upright. "Are you okay? Did he hurt you?"

"Gray, he wasn't trying to hurt—"

The ice exploded in a fine dust. Sting appeared, panting, the smile finally gone from his face. "That's it, I haven't even spent any time with you and I'm fucking sick of your shit. I don't know how you do it, Juvia, I would have drowned the little prick a long time ago."

Gray steamed. "Don't talk to her, pervert."

"Big words coming from a guy who's half naked," the dragon slayer pointed out.

Gray hadn't even noticed his shirt had disappeared. He ignored the jab and felt for the coolness in the air.

"Stop this, both of you," Juvia interjected. The only thing they did was ignore her.

Sting gathered energy for a blast of light that would likely do more damage than he had intended but couldn't seem to help it. He was feeling suddenly, insanely violent. The air vibrated. Gray called on his devil slayer's magic, ready to pull out the big guns if Sting was, too. Juvia gathered her own magical energy, prepared to get between them if necessary.

"That is enough!" A reedy man came teetering out of the kitchen, a thick butcher's knife in hand as if that would be some protection against the battling mages. "This is a _respectable_ establishment! Get out, all of you! And don't come back!"

"But—" Gray started, not sure what he was about to say. _But he started it? Really?_

"But nothing. There are families here!" The knife was waved threateningly in their direction. Gray looked around and saw that he was right; a family of four looked on with duplicate expressions of rapt horror.

That was enough to have him grab Juvia's hand in his and stalk to the exit. "He's right. Come on."

"Gray—" Juvia started to protest but then let the words die. She shot an apologetic look to Sting and didn't miss the accusation in his eyes. He expected her to stay. Her heart sank. When had their non-complicated relationship become so suddenly complex?

Gray tightened his grip on Juvia. He felt Sting's power dissipate with every step he took and knew the dragon slayer was regaining control of his temper.

The ice mage snorted, not so easily placated but smart enough to know that if they really got into it in that damned hotel a lot of people would get hurt.

There would be other days and other places to settle the score.

* * *

Sting watched them go with a sense of numb detachment, a little frustrated, a lot angry. He didn't know if he cared about Juvia in the traditional sense; he had never loved anyone before and didn't suspect that was going to change any time soon, but he wasn't really happy to watch her walk away. _Why?_ He told himself it was because he liked touching her, liked the way she moaned and needed him. That was clear enough.

Months ago he was just happy to put it on her, happy to sneak her in at night and look away during the daylight hours. It worked because the ice wizard didn't show any signs of interest and it wasn't like he had any commitments. Being master of the second busiest guild in Fiore was challenging, time-consuming work. He didn't have time for relationships ever. Enter Juvia; miserable, frantic and wild, just waiting to give it away, though the guy she wanted was too fucking dense to take her up on the offer. Sting was all too happy to step in and help out. No ties, no expectations. Just two people wanting to pass the time, wanting to burn out some energy.

Who needed relationships anyway? Feelings just mucked things up. At the time, he figured let Gray deal with her emotional highs and lows and he'd just reap the reward of her frustration.

Turns out he kind of liked her misery. No one ever accused him of being a nice guy. He just liked the way she was passionate and crazy in bed after Gray turned her down. That suited him just fine.

Or it had, until seconds ago.

He gridded his teeth, appalled with himself when he realized he had expected the water mage to pull back from Gray and come to his side. It was that moment that clued him in, that let him know that there was a seriously big issue.

Suddenly things got a little realer.

Sting pushed against the revelation. He never, ever wanted to be tied down and definitely never thought—whenever he bothered to imagine those days—it would be to Juvia Lockser.

Yeah. A big bloody issue.

He let the two mage's go and chewed on that little bit of enlightenment.

* * *

Outside in the late-summer air Gray asked again, "Are you sure he didn't hurt you?"

Juvia's hand was still tucked into his. She gave herself a second to enjoy the coolness of his skin, the roughness of his hands, the little electrical pulse that raced from his body into hers. She wanted to stay that way forever but knew that wouldn't be possible, that the time had come for a confession before things could be blown out of proportion. He deserved the truth.

"Gray..."

He glanced over at her, took in the hesitation and thread of fear in her eyes and almost turned back to finish things with Sting, thinking it was the slayer that made her feel that way.

"I—" She almost couldn't do it, then she remembered that cord of bravery she discovered last night and squared her shoulders. "I wanted him to be there. He wasn't... He didn't force himself on me."

The words hung between them for a breath. "What?" Gray asked finally.

"I... I mean... Sting and I..."

She didn't need to finish the sentence. He got her meaning. His neck flushed and his ears roared. What he actually meant to say was an indifferent, ' _oh_ ,' but what came out was, "What the fuck was last night then?"

Juvia flinched. "I thought it'd help you choose..."

"Choose? Sounds like you've already made a choice." _Calm down._ _Calm down. Be cool._ He couldn't make enough ice to bleed the hotness from his neck. The word _betrayal_ sang through his mind, though logically he knew he didn't deserve to feel that emotion. What was Juvia to him?

Rain fell out of the sky in a sheet. It was cold for summer. "Yes, you, Gray—"

"And yet all this time you've been fucking Sting? How long?" He had no right to ask, didn't even rightly want to know, but there it was.

Juvia looked away. "Shortly after the Grand Magical Games."

He pressed his lips into a thin, tight line, a scowl pasted to his face. "All that time?" They had _lived_ together for god's sake.

"Yes, but Juvia doesn't love Sting... She loves you," she hurried to say. "You've ignored me all this time and then you were gone for _months_ , and yesterday you said yourself you wouldn't care if I was with another man..."

Gray was quiet for so long Juvia thought he'd be silent forever.

Then he squared his shoulders and took in a deep breath. "I did. I did say that." This is what he wanted. The reminder helped quiet his mind if only temporarily. There was that little pang of betrayal that rattled around in his chest.

 _You always turn her down._

 _That was when you thought she'd always be there._

Selfish.

"Gray-sama, please don't look at Juvia like that," she rushed to say, ignoring her 'no sama' rule, but that was an incorrect statement; he wouldn't even glance at her let alone meet her eyes.

He pulled away, sliding his fingers out of hers with some difficulty because she tried hard to keep hold. As soon as he was free he stuffed his hands in his pockets so she couldn't try to pull him back. "Good. That's good that you're... moving on." It didn't feel good. It felt like the breath was being stolen from his lungs.

"No, Gray-sama!" She was close to tears. "That's not what... I don't love him, I love you—that… it didn't mean anything."

Gray swallowed around the lump in his throat, anger bubbling hotly. It had certainly meant something to Sting. That only made the situation worse. "Just give it up, Juvia, you're almost there. We're never going to happen, so forget about it. I don't want you." He was such a liar, but a good one. She recoiled like he had slapped her and the first tear fell. He wasn't quite satisfied to leave it there. "Stop crying. It's not like you didn't know that. I wasn't going to suddenly change my mind; it was no before; nothing's different." He didn't want to hurt her any worse than he had to so he stopped there when he could go on for hours about what a traitor she was.

"But..."

He turned away, lost in a mess of emotions. Anger warred with regret and pain and jealousy and sadness, too.

Juvia wasn't ready to give up. "Never? You never thought of me like that?" Her voice was choked.

He couldn't bring himself to answer. Instead he pretended like he didn't hear and walked faster.

"I don't believe you," she said, though he hadn't replied. "I don't believe that all this time you felt _nothing_." She rushed to keep pace with him, feet clopping over the uneven ground. She stumbled but came upright. "Gray-sama, _stop_ and talk to me! Please!"

He groaned and faced her, grabbing selfishly at her shoulders just for an excuse to touch her, needing to do so only because she was suddenly unattainable. "And say what? What do you want from me?"

"I want you to understand that this thing with Sting—"

"Doesn't matter to me one bit?" he finished and was pleased when his voice came out evenly.

Juvia's chin warbled. "I don't believe it."

"Well," he shrugged, "you always were great at denial."

Juvia would have crumpled, but there was that newfound vein of iron in her blood. "Kiss me and tell me you don't feel anything."

Gray started. "What? No."

"Because you know I'm right. You love me too." He had to, she had championed him to Sting at every turn. She didn't know what she'd do if she had been wrong. "Kiss me."

"No. Let's just go and do this job."

Juvia crossed her arms over her chest, tears slowing, a sense of purpose taking their place. "I won't, not until you do this."

"What's the point?" he hissed. She opened her mouth to respond but he cut her off. "There is none, Juvia, you're just prolonging this fucking wild fantasy. It'll be easier to let go when you just accept that it's not going to happen."

"Gray—"

"Is he cool with you fawning after me? 'Cause I'm not. It's not healthy."

She clenched her jaw stubbornly. "Sting knows who I am." A kind of wicked, sinful girl who lusted after two men. "Just do it, Gray. Kiss me." She needed to know for herself, as well. Would kissing Gray be as wonderful as she had imagined, or would it leave her hollowed out? Would she figure out if she was just a flake of a girl, unable to think only about one man, or did she have staying power? "Sting knows how I feel."

It was that comment more than anything that had Gray relenting. He didn't like that Sting knew something about Juvia that he didn't and it seemed lately the dragon slayer knew quite a bit. It was a terrible reason to kiss her, one that would only extend the heartache, but no one ever accused him of making excellent decisions.

He grabbed her roughly and pulled her close, not giving much warning. Juvia squeaked but the sound was cut off when Gray crushed his mouth to hers. For a second the rain fell harder, in thick, drowning sheets, and then it petered back to a light drizzle.

This time the kiss was a bit different, but no less wretched. And let's clarify, not the kiss itself was wretched, the kiss was excellent, but it was cold and wet and full of unsaid accusations, hurt and a certain amount of hopelessness, for Gray knew the inevitable end, what he would have to say when it was through. That would come after, though. For now he dragged her close, breathed in the smell of late summer rain, and kissed the woman he thought would always be there but was slipping away faster than he could blink.

Juvia finally managed to do something other than stand there. She wrapped her arms around his neck and held him tightly just as she had imagined doing. This was better. He didn't just sit numbly like he had the night before, he moved his tongue against hers, let his fingers thread through the ends of her hair, and kneaded the flesh at her hip. She sighed into his mouth. This is how it was supposed to be, just her and Gray, and she knew she hadn't been wrong, she _did_ love him, though there was a guilty patter to her heart because she couldn't quite stop thinking about the way Sting had kissed her earlier. Or looked at her with such betrayal when she walked away.

That was something she'd have to deal with.

Gray pulled back, breath panting in his lungs as if he had run miles. His skin was afire, prickly and uncomfortable, but still he couldn't quite bare to let go of her. He dug sharp fingers into Juvia's shoulders wishing desperately things were different.

He wanted to drag her back in for more.

He wanted to turn away and leave her standing there.

"That didn't change a thing," he croaked. It changed _everything_ , though it wasn't as if it mattered. The only thing it really served to do was solidify in his mind what exactly it was that he would be walking away from if he let Juvia go now.

It hurt worse than before.

"You didn't feel anything?" Juvia didn't want to believe him but he had a twisted, pained expression on his face.

Gray shook his head, not trusting himself to reply.

She sucked in a warbling breath then swiped roughly at the tears on her cheeks. They were coming again, fast and hot. "Really?"

Gray released her reluctantly and started walking again, ignoring her question, not wanting to repeat himself. The truth would simmer out if he did.

After a moment Juvia followed, feet heavy over the ground. She really thought he'd be less apathetic. What was wrong with him? What was wrong with her?

They travelled in silence for ten whole minutes before Juvia hiccoughed and asked, "Is it because of Sting?"

"No." Not only, anyway. Things were much more complex than that.

"Is it because you hate me?" She couldn't see another reason for his refusal.

He scrubbed his hands over his face. _Yes. A little._ "I don't hate you Juvia, there's just nothing between us. No chemistry." Who was he kidding? Juvia, obviously.

She wrapped her arms around her middle and stared at the ground. "I guess I thought…"

"You thought wrong." He felt like an ass but shrugged it off. Why was he consoling her? He wasn't the one throwing around proclamations of love and then sleeping with other people. He wasn't the one that went after that goddamn loud mouth cocky bastard.

 _There's nothing wrong with her seeing other people. You told her so last night._

 _Yeah, before you thought that was a possibility._

He told his brain to shut up but when it did his mouth moved instead. "Why Sting?" he asked without meaning to. "And _how_?" They never had much to do with each other, as far as he knew.

She looked at him with watery eyes. "I don't know. We were celebrating late one night in Crocus after the Grand Magical Games… You… you had just left, and I was feeling kinda down. Sting came over and offered to buy me a drink and, well…" she flushed, wondering how much he wanted to know.

It wasn't very much. Gray waved at the air, cutting her off. "Alright, alright." He couldn't get the image out of his head. It made him steam. "He's a loser," he added for good measure.

Juvia bit her nail and didn't reply. She _liked_ Sting. He made her feel good—physically and emotionally, even if he was only offering escape. She couldn't bring herself to speak badly of him so she said nothing at all.

Her silence didn't escape Gray's notice. He grumbled incomprehensibly.

"Pardon?"

"Nothing," he snapped. "Let's just get moving. We've wasted enough time on this shit."

Juvia sighed. She didn't even want to do this job any more. "Okay." The sooner they were done the sooner she could go home and wallow.

The rain followed.

* * *

Inundated with chapters. That's what you get.


	5. Chapter 5

Lindworms were wretched little creatures with faces full of razor sharp teeth, large, bulbous coal coloured eyes, small, iridescent scales and slit, sensitive nostrils. They were fast, they were mean, they were smart and their instincts were unparalleled. They were man eaters, those cousins of dragons, small little wyrms with two feet, tiny wings, and hardened scales. They lived in nests of sometimes three hundred, choosing to reside under mountains or inside foothills, led by a singular, larger queen.

The mayor of Port Dover had explained when Gray accepted the job offer that the Lindworms were thought to be holding up in the foothill closest to town. He had described it as a large, midnight black rise, crusted with the wyrm excrement that they used to stabilize the outer hill.

Moving through the foothills, they had no trouble finding it. Even at a distance, it smelled like death warmed over. The falling rain only made things worse. Gray wanted to tell Juvia to knock it off but knew anything he said was only going to make her more miserable. He curled his shoulders and walked with a renewed sense of purpose, eager to have this done and over with.

"It's going to be dangerous when we get in there, Juvia. I need to know your head's in the game," Gray said as they approached.

Juvia looked at him numbly.

"Alright?" He pressed.

"Yes," she replied in a monotone voice and shivered. Though she was the rain, she was just as wet and miserable as Gray. The air was colder this high up, their breaths condensed, a little puff of white that whirled away on a howling wind.

Gray rubbed his devil slayer's mark absently, Levy's warnings rattling inside his head louder and louder the closer they came. " _Don't let them hear you. Don't wear any jewelry. Don't speak loudly. Don't use magic until you're sure you can make a kill. During the daylight hours they'll all be in the center hill, so you can move freely throughout the mound, but don't think that means you can start wandering. There will be an entrance tunnel that_ should _take you all the way to the center. You'll know you're there because the floor will slope dramatically in towards the centre. They dogpile when they sleep._ " She was a godsend.

"Make sure to cover up any jewellery you have," Gray passed on to the water mage, raising his voice to be heard over the sharp, frigid gusts. "They like precious metals. Also, if you have anything like keys in your pocket you better hide them away now. Lindworms have really sensitive hearing."

"Okay." She wasn't truly paying attention, mind elsewhere, churning, wondering if there was a way to make it so she and Gray could roll over this unpleasantness.

"I'll take care of them—I'll freeze them solid before they realize we're there, but I need you to watch my back," he continued.

"Mm," she said dismissively.

"Hey," he halted and faced her, trying to smooth his face into an expression that wasn't twisted up with hurt and anger. "Are you good to do this?"

Juvia blinked, looking like a woman rising from the deep. "I'm good," she said with more confidence then she felt. She was listless and drifting, a ship without a sail or an anchor bobbing through the open sea.

Gray nodded, knowing that she wasn't but tried to shrug off the warnings. He didn't really need her help to do the job, he just needed her to keep out of trouble for a few minutes while he decimated the lot of them. "Alright. I'm depending on you," he lied just to try to cheer her up. When she didn't respond he said, "Don't let this other stuff bug you, alright?"

Easier said than done for Juvia Lockser. She fretted and wanted to bite her nails until they bled, hating herself and irrationally hating Gray, too, but knowing there wasn't much to say. Of course it bothered her and likely would for a very long time, but if he really didn't want her then she had no choice but to try to move on and leave him alone. "I messed up, I'm sorry Gray," she said as a last final bid at forgiveness.

Gray ignored her because he couldn't rightly accept or deny her apology. To accept meant that he acknowledged her wrong, but that also meant that he acknowledged that he felt something for her, and to decline it meant he had lied through his teeth when he said it didn't bother him that she was seeing other people while he diligently ignored her. Either way he was exposed, either way he was screwed. He clenched his hand into a fist and ploughed on ahead, "I'm going to go in first but I need you to keep an eye out, just in case they try to flank me, kay?"

Juvia squared her shoulders, catching his meaning. _Shut up._ She knew he was right, the time for tears and apologies had passed and now they had a job to do. It just sucked. She didn't want to play the victim—she had willingly gone with Sting and didn't regret it either. At least, not much. "Alright," she swiped away a damp thread of hair and pushed down the melancholy. "I'm ready."

Gray nodded, relieved that she seemed to pull herself together. "You won't have much to do other then make sure when I start doing my thing that I'm not going to get jumped from behind. As soon as I start freezing them they'll wake up and try to attack. Just keep me free and clear for a few seconds until I can get a good coverage. There might be some stragglers, too. I have a light lacrima in my pocket, but I won't pull it out until we need it. It'll be dark inside so stay close to me."

"Can't I go in first? I want to do it," she offered suddenly. "I can drown them and you won't have to worry about anything." She thought it was the least she could do after all the turmoil she'd caused.

"No." It was a simple word but it cracked through the air and dug into Juvia's skin. She bit her tongue hard feeling too raw to field off Gray's moodiness.

"I mean," Gray corrected, taking a deep, stabilizing breath, "It's fine. I'm just going to use this," he held up his arm for her to see, "It'll be quick and easy, over before you can blink. We just need to get into the nest."

"Fine." She didn't like it but was willing to submit to keep the peace.

Gray scrubbed a hand through his wet hair, trying to dry it a little. It was still raining, though now it had thankfully slowed to a drizzle. "We have to cut through the field," he said, pointing. There was no path to the foothill but the Lindworms had beaten down the long grass from their scampering back and forth in an effort to hunt. They generally ate small mammals, though a human was certainly not excluded from the menu. In fact, they were the preferred choice, though man was usually smarter and more difficult to catch then shrews. The only downfall was a lindworm only needed to bite a person once for them to be paralyzed.

"Keep your eye out for any hunters—they'll be hiding in the grass if they're around." Lindworms were nocturnal, sure, but that didn't mean he and Juvia could be careless.

"Yes."

"You made sure your keys aren't bouncing around?"

"Yes."

"And you took your earrings out?"

"I didn't wear any."

"And you're going to stay behind me?"

Her temper stretched thin. "Yes, Gray! I heard you."

Gray scowled at her, a cutting rebuttal on the tip of his tongue. He choked it back. "Just making sure."

"Well, don't." She wasn't going to fuck up—all she had to do was stand there like a useless twit anyway. For a second she was furious with him but knew she was only deflecting. "Let's… let's just go, I want to go home."

Gray got that. He sighed and took the lead wishing he had taken this job on his own, or perhaps that he hadn't even bothered telling Juvia about it. If he hadn't he wouldn't have found out she was laying around with Sting, he could keep thinking that one day she could be his. _That wasn't ever going to happen._ But it was a nice fantasy that was all smeared with mud now.

He walked faster, tall grass wicking water against his pants. It didn't matter, the material was already saturated in rain.

* * *

The foothill smelled even worse when they stood at its side. It was covered in that thick, crusting blackness that Gray was reluctant to get near.

The lindworm entrance was clear enough, all those trails through the straw-coloured grass led to one place, a low tunneled hole in the thick rock. It looked like it was carved by magic but Gray knew through his research that it was actually the lindworm's acidic breath that had done such damage. Seeing the puckered and craggy rock all melted like that was sobering. They were small creatures, but they were seriously mean.

They had to kneel to crawl into the entrance. Gray made a small sheet of ice to avoid touching the feces-covered ground even though Levy had told him not to use his magic until he was in a position to kill them, figuring it was worth the risk.

He crawled through and Juvia followed close on his heels. He turned and automatically helped her upright but dropped her hands as soon as he was able, not wanting to touch her for longer than necessary.

It was warmer inside the foothill. Not only were they protected from the elements, but the heat from so many bodies emanated and warmed the air. Both Gray and Juvia's skin steamed in the sudden warmness, visible by the faint light still leaching through the tunnel. Juvia shivered and wrapped her arms around her chest, teeth chattering. Gray gave her a warning _be quiet_ look. She let out a soft breath and tried to still her trembling body.

She should have brought an umbrella for the walk there. There was a time she always carried one, but she thought those days were long past. She hoped they would stay that way but with the way she was feeling now….

Gray felt the blackness on his arm throbbing. Sometimes it seemed like the mark had a will of its own, especially when danger was near. There was plenty of that now. He could hear from where they stood the collective inhale and release of breath, the dry sliding of scale over dry scale in the dogpile in the centre of the mound.

He didn't give himself a chance to relax. The lindworms should be sleeping now, but that wasn't a rule written in stone. There had been plenty of people that tried to destroy nests only to discover they weren't as tricky as they thought, the wyrms had heard their approach from miles away. Gray sent a silent prayer to anyone that was listening and hoped that the _entire_ foothill was asleep.

He crept forward. It was dark, dark, dark inside. For the most fleeting of moments, he missed Natsu and his ability to conjure flames. He dismissed the idea just as fast as it was birthed. If Natsu were with them there would be no sneaking, their presence would already be known.

Being in the dark was better for now. As soon as they got a little closer to the centre….

Juvia shuffled along, hands extended, feeling the smooth wall to keep herself straight and true. She thought to grab Gray's shirt, but didn't think the touch would be welcomed. Every time her toe scuffed against the ground she stiffened and knew Gray did, too, but he was diligent in keeping silent.

She brushed his shoulder and pulled back sharply. His skin was hot under her hands.

And kind of bumpy.

Sour breath broke over her face and Juvia stifled a gag, a low whine creeping out of her lips.

"Juvia?" Gray asked from behind.

She stiffened.

Something large and warm snorted and Juvia's damp shirt whipped around her middle. She yanked her hand away just as it opened its mouth and snapped where her fingers had been.

"Juvia!" Gray reached for her in the darkness with one hand while he yanked the light lacrima from his pocket with the other. It lit up as soon as his fingers closed upon its smooth surface and threw the dark hollow into sharp relief. The largest Lindworm he had ever seen stood on two stalky legs, pointed teeth dripping in the false light. It squinted sensitive eyes and squawked indignantly. Juvia stumbled backwards and turned on her heel. Gray was so close she collided bodily with him and the pair went sprawling to the ground in a mess of limbs. The wyrm howled again and bobbed forward, teeth gnashing.

The roar shook the ground.

 _It's the queen_ , Gray thought frantically. Juvia was pressed on top of him, her arm all but inside his mouth. She had elbowed him in the face when they fell and all he could taste was copper from where his lip had split open on his teeth. Rock sizzled and the girl scrambled and scurried, fighting to get upright. In her haste she kneed him first in the groin and then in the gut. Gray 'oofed,' for a moment paralyzed with pain.

"Sorry Gray-sama!" she cried.

The ground shook again and Gray forced himself into motion. He cursed colourfully and pushed Juvia away. She fell on her rump in her rush to get upright.

"Ow," she complained, but Gray couldn't pay her any mind, there was a beast that required his attention, and soon the rest of her colony would be homing in on their position. He could already hear them shifting and grunting as they came awake.

The queen roared again and lumbered forward on stilted, short legs. Gray's eyes snagged on those scraping, filthy claws and morbidly imagined them tearing into his skin. That was enough motivation to get the hell up. He had to take a hasty step backwards when the queen lunged. Juvia was there at his back. The two bumped into each other again but managed to stay upright.

"Back off," he commanded, but Juvia wasn't listening, her eyes were fixed on the snarling matriarch, her mouth twisted down in something like fear. Gray imagined her next, eviscerated and bleeding, a seeping waste.

 _Finish this quick,_ he thought, otherwise someone was going to get hurt and he was damned if he wasn't making it out of there, he still had stuff to do and Juvia had to live.

His devil slayer's mark cooled so rapidly it hurt, and then expanded, stretching up his body over his neck and across his cheek. His magic throbbed, the temperature plummeted. The queen sensed the coming threat and shot forward, pushing through the air with small stunted, leathery wings. They gave her enough momentum that Gray had to act quickly. He shot out a lance of ice, intent on skewering the beast.

Juvia shouted and reacted, too, sending out a wall of water to push the thing back. Her magic collided with Gray's, water and ice meeting and then exploding. Instead of the two spells complimenting each other they collided messily, neither one doing the damage it was meant to do. The water froze in a steep slope and the lance became entrapped in that wide wall. The only saving grace was that now the queen was, however momentarily, trapped behind that short icy blockade. It wouldn't hold her off for long, the ends were open and it was only a matter of time before she stopped trying to scrabble over it and realized she could go around.

"What the hell? I told you to back off!" Gray hissed in annoyance.

Juvia squared her shoulders. "I was attacking!"

"That wasn't part of the plan!"

"The plan's all shot to hell!"

The ground rumbled as many clawed feet started clacking over its stony surface. Juvia paled and Gray's heart squeezed with panic.

"I told you I got this, Juvia, you get out of here."

She shook her head. "I'm not leaving you!"

The queen snarled again and finally discovered the way around the strange half-wall. Juvia tried to ready her stance again but Gray stuck out a hand and pushed her back. "You have to run."

"Come with me," she said hurriedly.

Gray shook his head. It was too late for that kind of tactic. Even if they could somehow manage a hasty escape, they wouldn't get far before the lindworms had them surrounded. No, this enclosed space was the best place to deal with them.

Though he was going to have to do something a little more drastic than what was originally planned.

Which meant that Juvia needed to get out.

"Hurry! Leave!"

Juvia ignored him and grabbed his hand. She pulled him bodily towards the exit but now the walls were drowned with scampering Lindworms, nails clacking, breaths hissing, stone bubbling under acidic spittle. They had to stop.

In seconds Gray and Juvia were completely surrounded, and who was with them in the centre of that ring of creatures? The seething queen, a silver, forked tongue lolling between identical razor blade teeth.

One of the wall wyrms shot forward, pumping wildly with too-small wings, going for Juvia's chest with reckless abandon at the same time the queen snapped her jaws. The creature, caught in between, was severed in half. The two bits fell to the ground and twitched wetly, the ends seeping with too much blue blood.

Juvia's breath quickened. That could have been her hand.

The other wyrms, wild with bloodlust, seemed to take that as an invitation. They all started scuttling down the wall, desperate cries filling up the hollow hill. Juvia started hitting them with blast after blast of water, forcing them back against the walls where they either cracked their heads or broke their spines with the force. She didn't feel guilty for the way they screamed, her adrenaline was pumping too steadily for that.

One particularly agile creature leapt for Gray's face. He hollered and froze it mid-jump. It solidified and dropped heavily to the ground where its tail snapped off and spun away.

The queen watching the whole exchange, barked in protest. Juvia hit her with a slice of water and she lunged with renewed ferocity, moving quicker than she had before, quicker than she had any right to.

Juvia sucked in a startled breath and gathered magic to protect herself, but she was a beat too slow. The Lindworm was on her, closing needle teeth over her neck.

Gray watched for a helpless breath as Juvia was bullied back against the stone wall. She pushed at the Lindworm with useless hands, voice a wet gurgle. Gray did the only thing he could think of, though he knew it might (most likely) hurt Juvia too. Doing nothing was worse. Doing nothing meant that she would belong to the ocean or the earth. Doing nothing meant she was gone forever and that wasn't acceptable. She might at least survive this.

He gathered a gross amount of power, slayer mark cracking and burning with cold, and pushed magic out of his body in a thick, suffocating wave. He knew when he hit Juvia because she screamed piercingly, but then that was drown out by the bellowing Lindworm queen.

He did his best to ignore Juvia's pain and pushed harder, forcing the magic in a way he hadn't yet, finding the limit he had set for himself and then bursting past it until everything was white and smooth and motionless. When the dust settled, he couldn't find the water mage.

* * *

Sting paused, beer raised halfway to his lips though it wasn't nearly late enough for such things, and peered at the world outside through dirty, fingerprint-smudged glass, listening intently. The late morning was gloomy and dark, the rain falling in a steady wave, making it impossible to do anything but sit there and wait, and being a man who had just discovered he didn't know himself near as well as he thought, he figured getting fuzzy and dull was as good a way as any to capture that spirit of recklessness he seemed to have abandoned when he accepted being master of Sabretooth, before things started changing. Everything used to be simple, straightforward, dry cut, but now they were getting complicated. Life was better when it was easy.

The noise came again and he listened hard, slayer ears pushing out the general din of the Waterfront's bar and knew he hadn't misheard. The snarl of many creatures sang through the air, distant but most definitely there. He froze when a higher, clearer voice joined the clamour and knew that not everything was going according to plan for Gray and Juvia. His heart hammered and his palms sweated.

"Hey, where are you going?" the barkeep demanded when Sting rose so quickly the chair toppled over on its back.

He didn't bother answering the guy, just dropped some money down on the bar, not sure if it was enough or way too much, and moved as fast as he could.

Outside the air tasted strange. Frigid. His breath fogged. It had been warm only an hour ago.

When he looked towards that gods forsaken mountain, the foothills and all of its surrounding brothers were frozen solid, their surfaces, once black with excrement or green with luscious growth, were now silver and sharp. The ground halfway to Port Dover was ice. He could hear the cries of a deer that had gotten its leg trapped by the suddenness of the frost. Its panicked voice rose through the morning air, but other than that strange baying, the world was eerily quiet.

Sting didn't like it.

Something was wrong.

He looked back toward the Waterfront Hotel and again at the foothills and sighed. He closed the distance at a fast jog, not wanting to burn himself out before he got there. It was a struggle to keep an even pace, he kept imagining why Juvia had screamed like that, what it meant, what he was going to find when he made it there.

There was a sick feeling in his stomach that was difficult to ignore.

* * *

She was half-girl, half an ever-changing river, though she was so cold she was numb. She had been trying to dissolve her body when Gray had frozen the world and now instead of being water, she was ice, hard and unforgiving, frozen and dazed.

She closed her eyes.


	6. Chapter 6

There was a sob building in his chest, one that he fought to swallow but was being forced upwards with the mounting panic. Where was she? How could he unfreeze her if he couldn't find her? How long could she last before her heart stalled?

"Juvia!"

As if she could answer.

 _Breathe._

 _Think._

"Juvia!"

His mind was sluggish. This ice felt harder than it ever had before. He had used a lot of power and this new magic was still strange.

What if he couldn't reverse it?

What if she died?

Could he live with himself?

 _No._

Gray scrambled over the frozen surface, feet slipping. He sprawled like a newborn deer, as if he hadn't been walking on ice since he was a kid. He hit the ground hard and twisted his arm painfully. He swallowed the yell that came after and forced himself upright. His breath fogged and his skin finally prickled with cold.

"Juvia! Where are you?" He looked towards the solid Lindworm queen. Juvia was supposed to be there— _right there_ —but she wasn't. It didn't make sense. Girls didn't just _disappear_.

 _What if your magic tore her apart? What if there's nothing left, not even a wash of red to mark that she had ever been here at all?_ He didn't want to see her blood.

He skidded to the queen and went crashing into her. She was solid. He nearly went careening backwards but he wrapped an arm around her long neck and managed to keep himself upright. The ice was thicker in this region, and cloudier, too. He couldn't see from his earlier position, but now that he was here it looked strange.

 _Water._

 _Water, you idiot. Juvia was becoming water._

And now her disappearance made sense. He forced his mind to calm down enough that he could peer through the hazy surface and he knew he was standing on top of the girl. Instead of moving he crouched down. There were her clothes trapped below that thick, cloudy ice. And there, a slender, pale hand attached to most of an arm. That's where her body stopped. Gray let out a choked gasp and laid his hands against the icy surface, channeling his magic. It was always strange to melt ice—it was certainly more difficult than creating it, less natural for him to be sure. And this ice was _thick_. It creaked and groaned but didn't budge. Gray wheezed out a curse and dug deeper for a little bit more energy. He was tired. Freezing the hill like that had cost him.

The first layer of ice was the hardest. It bubbled and hissed and trickled slowly. He didn't know if that was Juvia or ice of his own creation that was slipping away. _Don't think about that_. He pushed harder.

Black spots formed at the corners of his vision; his skin broke out in a sweat even though the temperatures were well into the minuses.

That first pale finger peeped out of the surface of the ice and encouraged him to keep going, to not give up just yet. As soon as he got past a certain threshold the ice started melting quickly, rivulets racing over the frozen ground and pooling in a natural dip in the floor.

 _You're almost there_. But he couldn't be sure that the ice he was melting was Juvia's body. He expanded the circle he warmed until he reached the very edge of his energy and then pushed that extra little bit harder. His head swam. His heart stuttered. His lungs ached.

The last bit of ice let go in a hot, boiling gush.

Gray saw black.

* * *

Juvia's teeth chattered. She sat up, totally soaked, and tried to take in her surroundings. She was on ice, her damp skin sticking to the stuff. Her one hand panged badly with pain. A glance at the skin there confirmed that it was dark with frostbite. When she tried to move her fingers they would not. _I need Wendy,_ she thought, and then remembered the healing lacrima the young girl had spelled for her several weeks ago. It was in her bag.

Back at the hotel.

She bit her tongue, aggravated with herself for being so damn careless, and looked skywards—directly into the face of a snarling Lindworm queen. At first her heart hammered but then she realized that it was frozen solid. _Dead,_ she thought, and then touched an icy hand to her throat. She expected her fingers to come away crimson but they didn't. She had managed to change her body just in time to avoid the poisonous bite.

 _That was close,_ she thought, and then remembered her companion.

"Gray?" her voice echoed through the frozen cavern and fell on deaf ears.

Juvia dragged her eyes away from the queen and found him sprawled against the ground, arms and legs splayed out like a splatted spider's. There was a pool of blood under his nose and his eyes twitched behind pale blue lids.

"Gray!" she cried, and scrambled. Her limbs were slow to respond, stiff and aching, and when she pulled away from the ice her flesh smarted and tore. She sobbed but did her best to ignore the pain. She went to his side, and tapped his cheek too hard. She couldn't make her hands steady enough to be gentle.

"Gray?"

He breathed wetly through his mouth and let out an incomprehensible gurgle.

 _Shit,_ she thought wildly, "Come on, Gray-sama, wake up!"

She tucked her hand under his cheek and lifted his head from the cold ground, then brushed the hair back from his forehead with the blackened hand while she looked for any wounds. There were none visible. "Gray?" she tried again.

Gray cracked a bleary eye at the sound of her voice. "Juvia?" He barely sounded conscious.

"Yes." She felt tears at her eyes.

He breathed out a sigh of relief and slipped back into unconsciousness.

Watching him, she wanted to lie down beside him and sleep, too, she was so exhausted. _You'll die if you do that,_ she thought.

 _Stop it. Focus, he needs your help._ Juvia tapped his cheek again. "Gray?"

His eyes opened more willingly this time. His face was losing some of that ashen and green gleam. His magic was regenerating slowly but surely. Juvia dabbed her damp sleeve against his face, mopping up the blood as best she could. He was mostly clean by the time she was done but his clothes were drenched in the stuff. There was nothing she could do about that.

After a moment Gray nudged her fussing hands aside and sat up dazedly. "Juvia? You're alright?"

"I'm okay," she lied and hid her hand behind her back. He didn't need to worry about that now. "You killed the nest, they're all frozen."

Gray forced his stiff body to move and drew her in for a short, chest compressing hug, happy she was okay, happy that he hadn't hurt her.

"Gray—"

"I thought she was going to kill you," he offered by way of explanation. Turning his face down he looked at the girl's neck. It was unmarked, pale and smooth, not jagged and torn open like he had expected.

Juvia nodded. "It was close," she admitted, closer than she had wanted it to be. "Can you stand?"

"I think so," he agreed. He found he couldn't a moment later, his muscles were weak and shaky. He gritted is teeth, humiliation staining his pride. Juvia tucked her good arm under his shoulders and lugged him to his feet. Gray teetered and they nearly went over again but Juvia strengthened her stance.

"Thanks."

Juvia smiled weakly. "You can count on me." Neither one of them felt great, but together they could make it, she had to believe that.

At the entrance tunnel she made Gray go first, though he protested all the while. She didn't listen, her stubbornness kicking in. Finally he relented and crawled through on hands and knees. Juvia came out beside him and together they got back to their feet.

Outside the world looked like an ice rink. They were stationary for a beat, taking in the stretching landscape.

Gray closed his mouth, cutting off his O of surprise. "I did this?"

Juvia gave him a tight smile. "Silver once froze a whole village," she reminded him gently.

Gray pulled away from the memory. His father… he didn't want to think about him, not ever, but especially not now.

A body came over one of the small rises and Juvia squinted through all that glistening white to see who it was. Her heart faltered when she realized with a start that it was Sting.

"What's that asshole doing here?" Gray clipped out, realizing the same moment she did.

Juvia pressed her lips together but didn't reply. This wasn't something she wanted to deal with, not right now…

But it looked like he was heading straight for them. She closed her eyes, muttered out a curse and prayed that Sting wasn't going to be confrontational.

She knew the dragon slayer well enough now to know that he didn't know any other way to be.

She shot a look at Gray. His face was stormy.

For a man who said he cared very little, it looked like he cared quite a bit. She didn't know what to think about that and didn't have time to dissect it, either; as soon as Sting saw them he started running, eating up the ground with long, sure steps.

Gray bristled. "Come on, Juvia." He was determined to put on a good front even though he was exhausted. They started walking slowly.

"Hey!" Sting called when they were close enough.

Gray glowered and walked faster, not too sure what he had intended upon doing, but feeling prickly about it. The ground changed suddenly and his world twisted. He slid out of Juvia's grasp and went crashing to the ground quicker than he could get his hands out to correct himself. His head cracked against the ice and for the second time within the hour he was looking at black.

"Gray!" Juvia squawked.

"Seriously?" Sting laughed as he closed the distance. "What a loser, isn't this his ice?"

"He's tired," she came to his defense automatically, the anger she had felt earlier buried under concern. She crouched down and tried to wrap his arm around her neck. He was as limp as wet paper and she was clumsy with cold.

"What happened to your hand?" Sting demanded when he saw the twisted blackness it had become.

Juvia tried to hide it but it was no use now. "It was an accident," she explained.

He glowered. "Oh yeah?"

She let out a puff of air. "Yeah. He wouldn't do it on purpose, stupid."

Sting bit his tongue knowing that she was right. That didn't make him less angry, though. "You're shivering."

That was true enough. Her whole body was quaking. The sun was bright but the wind at this altitude was numbing and she was still soaking wet.

"Here," Sting shrugged off his coat and offered it to her.

Juvia shook her head. "I need to help Gray." She could see where his head was rising in a large goose egg. He was going to be unhappy about that when he woke.

Sting huffed. "Just take the damn coat and I'll help him." Grudgingly.

Juvia looked at him. "Really?"

He'd rather leave the dumbass there but he could see how frantic Juvia was. Her teeth chattered and her lips were blue but she held onto Gray stubbornly. He sighed. If it made her put on the coat and get down out of the foothills, he'd carry the stupid ice mage.

Stooping, he threw Gray bodily over his shoulder, slouching slightly under his added weight.

Juvia gave him a watery, appreciative smile and finally put on the jacket. It was a bit warmer, at least. They began their trek back to town, the going slow and slippery and silent. Oddly so. tensely so.

Juvia wanted to ask what he was doing there but was afraid of the answer. Likewise, Sting kept shooting her furtive looks, as if there was a question on the tip of his tongue that he couldn't quite bring himself to ask. It helped to ease the awkwardness if she checked on Gray often to make sure that he was okay. His head lolled loosely, face slack, but his skin still had good colour so she didn't bother worrying too frantically.

"So what happened?" Sting asked finally.

The tension dissipated like a fog burning off over water with those three simple words. Juvia inhaled and launched into their tale, happy for something to talk about, but as she spoke, Sting's expression only got progressively darker.

"If I was with you none of that would have happened," he said finally, cocky to the last. "Your hand wouldn't be fucked up, either."

Juvia bristled. "I told you it was an accident."

"Yeah," He boosted Gray up on his shoulder when he started slipping back. "And I still think it could have been avoided."

"You weren't there," Juvia barked.

"But if I had of been—"

"Why do you care so much?" she erupted. "You never did before." She wanted to take the words back as soon as they were out. This was a conversation she didn't want to have, not here. _Not anywhere_. She was terrified by what he'd say.

Sting closed his mouth, the words dying on his tongue and Juvia nearly collapsed with relief. That was an illusion she could hold on to for a little while longer.

They walked the rest of the way in silence.

* * *

Gray still hadn't woken by the time they got to the hotel. Juvia thought to worry but told herself that maybe he just needed a little more time to rest.

The owner gave them an incredulous look when they entered the lobby, eyes drawn to the ice mage. "What's wrong with him?"

"He's exhausted," Juvia explained, "but the Lindworms are gone." There was that at least. She peaked at him to see if he was furious about the scene they caused earlier but the owner's face had broken out into a smile.

"They've been a trouble for months," he gushed, suddenly more friendly. "I'm so glad you managed to take them out. Was it very difficult?"

Juvia hid her hand in Sting's coat and shook her head. "Once we got in there everything went fine." That's all the public needed to hear. He didn't need to know that Gray had damaged her skin, or that she almost had her throat torn out, or that Gray had nearly spelled himself to death with all the energy he used. "We just need some time to recover."

The man nodded. "Of course, of course, you can feel free to stay here as long as you need."

"Oh." She thought he would kick them out after that scene earlier, but apparently all was forgiven. She certainly wasn't going to push it if he was willing to look the other way. "Thank you."

"Just try to keep the disturbances to a minimum." He developed a stern expression.

"Yes, Sir. We'll be quiet as mice."

"Very well. Go on then."

She nodded to Sting and led the way to Gray's room.

Sting made for the elevators slowly, finally sweating under Gray's added weight. He grumbled silently and wondered how much Juvia would hate him if he just dropped the guy there. She'd probably be heinously pissed. But he liked it when she was furious.

… _maybe not that kind of furious_ , he scolded himself when the fantasy took a dark direction and he imagined himself alone that night and not wrapped around a certain water mage. He rolled his eyes but deigned to behave for just a little while longer. Soon he'd drop Gray off and forget about him.

 _Just like Juvia should be doing_. It kind of burned him up, her concern. Again he fought the urge to drop Gray on his smug face. _He's unconscious, dude, he's not being smug about anything_. _Besides, it'll be worth it when he wakes up and realizes you carted his dumb ass all the way out of the foothills._ Sting smiled haughtily, back on top once more, exactly where he liked to be. After that he walked with a little extra spring in his step. He wasn't careful getting into the elevator when it arrived, smashing Gray's feet off the wall. Juvia frowned but didn't scold.

The elevator was just as fast as before. Juvia gripped the handrail with white-knuckled hands and was endlessly glad when they stopped. She was out of the box first, walking quickly to Gray's room. She tried the door and it was locked. There was a brief second where she almost panicked, then realized that he probably had the key in his pockets. Turning to Sting, she patted the ice mage down and found she was correct. Gray didn't budge throughout the whole ordeal.

Using the key, she opened the door and went in first. "I guess you can just put him down on the bed."

Sting grunted and did as she asked, shrugging Gray off his shoulder roughly. Gray hit the bed and flopped like a ragdoll.

Juvia bit back her protest, curbing her sharp tongue and said, "Thank you for bringing him back."

"Yeah," Sting said. "Listen, Juvia... I wanted to talk to you—"

She shook her head stubbornly, not knowing what he was going to say but absolutely positive she didn't want to talk about it, especially in Gray's room while he lay sprawled and unconscious. "No, Sting."

He sighed out of his nose. "We always were better when we didn't talk, huh?"

"I'll see you later," she said by way of answer and motioned to the door.

"You're staying here?" He bit his cheek, hating the way those words sounded when they came out. _Jealous._ But he didn't get jealous, not over anyone. Especially not over a girl that was supposed to be nothing but a distraction.

She raised her brows challengingly. "For now."

Sting glowered but took the cue. He left, slamming the door in his wake, head too foggy for his own good.

Juvia sat in silence for a long moment, heart hammering. Her skin crawled with cold. She wanted to change, but knew she had to help Gray first. She pulled his boots off one handed, the process difficult and slow, and set them down neatly.

She rocked back on her heels and thought about undressing him. For a moment an old spark of excitement sang through her, but then she thought better of it. He'd be livid, it'd be awkward, (though she longed to see what he looked like under those clothes) and they were both injured. _And he doesn't want_ you. She couldn't forget about that.

She frowned. _Stop thinking like that._ Instead of pulling at his clothes, she pushed his hair aside. It was damp with sweat and rain water, but she didn't mind. Her fingers prodded the injured area gently and found the goose egg with ease. It was huge and warm. When she touched it Gray muttered incomprehensibly and scrunched up his face. She pulled away; there was no blood, so that was likely a good thing, but she wasn't a healer so she couldn't say for sure.

"I'll check on you in a bit, Gray," she promised, though she had no idea whether or not he could hear her. All the same, she squeezed his hand with her good one and left, closing the door gently, then returned to her room.

She went for her bag first and dug through for the pale lacrima that Wendy had given her. She held it tightly and waited for the healing magic to pool and stretch. The relief was immediate. Her skin warmed, the colour and feeling returned. It felt good and it felt terrible; it hurt as much as not. Tears pricked her eyes. She swiped them away; if she started crying again she wouldn't stop and she had enough of that for now. _Forever,_ but how likely was it her tears would evaporate for good?

 _You are the rain._

Her hand gave one final twang and then the ache eased. She wriggled her fingers experimentally; all five of them moved. Her skin was pink, nails rosy, bright and healthy.

"You're wonderful, Wendy," she praised quietly though the girl wasn't there to hear. She tried a smile. It was weak, but still, this was the very first thing that had gone right that day, and Juvia thought it warranted some kind of celebration.

 _And your shower,_ that was going to be perfect as well. Hot, long, refreshing.

Going for the washroom, she took off her clothes as she went, leaving a line of soaking cotton in her wake. She kept her eyes away from her reflection in the bathroom mirror, not wanting to see how pale she looked, and focused on turning on the water, adjusting the taps so it was steaming hot. On climbing inside.

To stand under the spray hurt at first, she was so cold. When the pain eased there was only pleasure. She tipped her head back and closed her eyes, breathing in the light aroma of the hotel's strawberry shampoo. Her limbs stopped aching, her skin stopped hurting and she felt like a human girl once more.

She hummed out a little tune as she rinsed her hair, an old song, one she had forgotten most of the words to, but it reminded her of a time she had been happy, before she was a miserable rain girl, before Phantom Lord and Fairy Tail, back when she thought she knew exactly who she was and the woman she wanted to be.

She didn't know anything, not anymore. She sang louder.

Something beyond the curtain moved, a dark blot against the pale fabric. At first Juvia dismissed it, thinking she had been imagining things, but then she heard a shuffling noise and knew that something wasn't right. She cut her song off mid-stanza and squinted through the opaque curtain. She couldn't see anything out there so she listened intently.

It was difficult to hear over the pounding water.

Her heart thundered, her palms prickled.

 _There's someone in my room. No. In my_ washroom. Which was significantly worse. There was nowhere to go in here.

The bathroom door squeaked. Juvia gnawed on her lip, wondering what she should do. She could turn to water and disappear down the drain… but then she'd be stuck in a drain. That was just gross. She could stand and fend off her intruder, but she was naked. She could call for help, but would anyone hear?

Before she could decide to do one thing or the other, the curtain was ripped back.

Juvia yelped and attacked blindly, a gush of water exploding from her palm into the face of the trespasser. When they cursed she realized it was a man, and then the water exploded back at her in a flash of light.

"Hey!" Juvia protested but the word came out garbled under that stream of water. She coughed and closed her eyes against the flood. They popped open a split second later when the water stopped and a warm body pressed into hers. "Get off of me you perv—"

He kissed her. Juvia startled back and pushed him away but he only stepped closer, over the edge of the tub and into the shower with her.

She scurried back. "Stop, what do you think—" Her feet slipped and she nearly went sprawling. Warm hands grabbed her hips and stabilized her.

"You don't want to kiss me anymore?"

Juvia stopped fighting and finally looked up into his face, feeling immediate relief. "You jackass! I thought you were some creep."

Sting's grin widened. He was as unfazed as ever. "Surprise."

She glowered. Sting came closer so their bodies were pressed tightly together. Juvia realized with a start that he was naked. Which meant he must have been listening to her shower. Must have heard her sing. She flushed hotly, embarrassed and flustered. "Gods. What are you doing in here? This is—this is a sacred place you know? I was _showering_."

"I wanted to see you." It was a simple sentence, but it had her heart skipping and stalling. "Nice song, by the way. Wanna sing for me some more?"

Juvia shook her head, humiliation making her skin prickle. "How did you get in?"

"You didn't lock your door, I thought it was an invitation." He pressed his hips into hers and she swallowed an unwelcomed purr.

"You can't just come into my room while I'm showering and—"

There was fire in his eyes. He silenced her with a scorching kiss and her thoughts scattered. "I didn't like when you left this morning," he said against her lips.

Juvia stammered. "You—we—we shouldn't…"

His fingers splayed across her belly, wicking through the warm water. "Why not?"

"Because… this morning…"

His hands dropped between her legs. "Does Frostbite know?"

Juvia gasped when he prodded her gently.

"Does he?" he repeated when she didn't reply.

"Y—yes. I told him." It was hard to think.

Sting bit her neck hard. "What did he have to say about it?"

Juvia reddened and wanted to pull away but his hands felt good.

"Eh? Did he care?" He was being cruel, he knew, but couldn't seem to stop himself.

Juvia couldn't bring herself to answer but that was okay, Sting already knew what she was going to say.

"I told you I'd be around when he turned you down."

Juvia said forlornly, "I don't know what I'm doing." Her lips brushed over his shoulder. He tasted like salt.

"I know," Sting replied. "Just close your eyes."

Juvia did as she was told. Sting leaned her back against the cool wall and let his hands wander until she panted and moaned darkly, until her fingers twisted in his damp hair, until she was pushing back against the wall to afford him better access, until Sting obliged and lifted her up by her thighs.

"You don't have to know all the answers," he said. "Let's just do what we're good at."

She held him tightly and did just that.


	7. Chapter 7

Gray, awaking with an aching headache, opened his eyes to see Juvia leaning over him, a concerned expression on her face. He lay there for a long time, eyes open, body still while she threaded her fingers gently through his hair. She hadn't noticed that he was awake yet, she was too involved for that. He watched her mouth; it was taut. He watched her eyes; they were worried. _About what?_

 _Me,_ was the obvious answer. _Me and my splitting head._ He flexed his fingers and felt something soft beneath his back, warm and smelling of fabric softener. It was out of place. Where was the ice? Where was the lindworm queen? _She's dead._ That memory came spiraling back, and another: freezing Juvia and finding her afterwards…

Juvia, finished her examination, tilted her face down and met Gray's eyes. She startled, then settled. "Gray-s—" She trailed off and Gray winced. "Gray," she said with more authority, "You're awake."

He fought his arm from the covers and felt the lump on the back of his head. "What happened?"

Juvia pressed her lips together. "You fell," she explained.

"I fell?"

"Well… you slipped," she said.

"Slipped on _what_?" He was afraid to ask.

Juvia hesitated.

"Tell me," Gray pressed.

"On ice." She said the words gently as if she expected him to be outraged.

He was. " _What_?"

"You were tired Gray, and I guess…" She shrugged, as if it were no big deal.

Gray felt his neck heat. He didn't slip on ice, not ever. It was his jam. It hadn't betrayed him in a long, long time. He wanted to refute her claim but didn't know what to say. He didn't know Juvia to be a liar, so her words must have been true. As hard as that was to swallow he made himself ask, "How did I get back here?"

Juvia looked determinedly away from his eyes. "That doesn't matter." She knew he wasn't going to like her answer.

Gray narrowed his eyes, suspicious of her behaviour. "What does that mean?"

"It's nothing." Juvia patted his shoulder, smiling falsely. "So how are you feeling?"

"Juvia." He said her name sternly; she snapped to attention. "What happened?"

She buckled under his gaze. "Sting carried you back."

He was quiet for a long moment, a flurry of emotions tearing through him. Mostly humiliation. "Sting?" His name jarred a memory, Sting holding onto Juvia securely; Sting coming over the foothills of a frozen world.

He swallowed tightly.

"Are you okay, Gray? Do you feel sick?" He looked a little ill.

"I'm fine." Drowning in bruised pride, but fine.

"No, you're not. You hit your head pretty hard. Here," Juvia brandished the lacrima Wendy had given her. It was mostly used up, but it would be enough to heal him at least a little.

When he was slow to accept it, Juvia grabbed his hand and pressed it into his palm. Immediately the magic emanated out, warm and comforting. Gray squeezed it hard, enjoying the crystal warmed by her skin. His headache eased, his vision cleared; a second later the magic died, but that was fine, his lump, though it was still there, was no longer the size of a goose egg. He blinked his eyes and Juvia came into sharp focus. Her hair was damp, falling in soft ringlets over her shoulders, and her lips were red and used looking, her throat pale and perfect. Not torn apart by a wyrm queen. "How are you feeling?"

"Juvia is fine."

But she almost wasn't. He lifted his hand and caressed her throat, feeling when she swallowed. It made him think they were much more intimate then they were. "Where is he?"

Juvia wrung her fingers together; it was the most she dared to move, lest the spell be broken and Gray stopped touching her. "Sting? I… I don't know."

Gray watched her mouth move and remembered kissing her. His thoughts jogged and he imagined Sting doing the same. Sting in his place, taking what he had turned down. For a moment he wondered what it would have been like if he hadn't pushed Juvia back. _Amazing. Heartbreaking_. Terrible. _You're a mess_. His hand moved to her cheek. "You don't love him?"

Her eyes, heavy lidded a second ago, flicked open and tracked to his. "I… no." She pushed her blue eyed dragon slayer from her mind in favor of her grey eyed devil slayer. Her heart panged.

Gray let his hand drift to her hair, curling a sapphire lock around his index finger.

"Gray…" Juvia's breathing slowed, the world crawled.

"Mmm?" _Stop it._ But he couldn't, pushed on by some manic force as if he were headsick. He propped himself up on his elbow and leaned in closer to her. She smelled like lilac.

 _He's going to kiss me._ Juvia's head whirled, her skin afire. She did absolutely nothing while he leaned in and pressed his mouth to hers, right over where Sting's kiss lingered. Her lungs ached until she breathed, and when she breathed, guilt tried to crush her. She pulled back, confused. Kissing Gray was never supposed to hurt. "Gray…"

He came back for her mouth, a fevered look coming over him.

"Wait—" Juvia pressed her hand to his bare chest. "Stop."

Gray froze in his tracks and met her eyes. "What?"

"We—we shouldn't."

He took a second to process that. _Shouldn't._ The word felt like poison. "What?"

"I—I just mean—" She trailed off.

Gray thrusted his hand through his hair, knowing whatever she said next was going to piss him off. "What?"

"I should talk to Sting—"

The slayer's name was like ice water in his veins. "I kiss you and you just want to talk about another guy?" Another guy she'd been fucking, no less.

Juvia's cheeks turned red. "Gray…"

Gray's mouth dried up. The betrayal he felt earlier was back, along with deadness, a cold in his chest that was entirely new to him. Silver's magic almost had a will and personality of its own, and currently it was unhappy. "Do you care about him?" _Why are you asking a stupid question like that?_ He didn't want to know the answer.

He opened his mouth to retract the statement but didn't get a chance to before Juvia said in a defeated voice, "Yes. No. I… I mean… It's complicated."

 _Complicated. So yes, she fucking cares._ Gray blew out a breath. "What kind of fucking answer is that?"

Juvia pressed her fingers against her eyes. "I'm sorry Gray."

Gray released her, skin burning with anger and shame. When he examined _why_ he felt that way _,_ the answer he found was ugly. He didn't think Juvia would ever deny him. She was the girl that would wait and wait and wait. Not any longer.

"Gray…" Juvia said his name quietly.

Gray sucked in a shaking breath and leaned away from her. "Thanks for checking on me, Juvia. I'm good now."

Juvia threaded her fingers through her hair and swallowed a groan. "Gray… did… _do_ you want to be with me?" She listened closely for his answer.

He pulled away from her. "I think you should leave."

"Wait—" He was slipping by.

"I was just fucked up, Juvia, that's all. I wasn't thinking straight." He tried to turn away but she stopped him with a hand on his shoulder.

There was sadness in her eyes. "Where did we go so wrong?"

He made himself say, "It was always wrong, right from the beginning."

She bit her tongue to keep the tears at bay and cleared her throat. "I don't believe that. I messed everything up."

Gray shook his head. "Don't worry, you don't get all the glory, we both did, Juvia."

It was a miserable thing, but somehow it made her feel a little better.

Gray blew his hair up off his forehead. "I think I'm going to get a bit more sleep then take off."

Juvia clutched her elbows. "The owner of the hotel said we can stay here for a couple days and recover if we want."

"Yeah." He just wanted to go home. "I don't want to stick around."

"Oh. Well, I'll pack and come with you—"

Gray shook his head. "No thanks, Juvia. You stay here, enjoy it a little, eh? I hear there's a hot spring and a spa and stuff."

She felt him pulling away faster than she could breathe and struggled selfishly to keep him in place. "I'd really rather just—"

"I want to travel by myself, okay?" Gray snapped. Candor was always the best route.

She bit her tongue until it hurt. "Are you going to be okay by yourself? Your head still has a bit of a lump and you used a lot of magic—"

 _"_ I'm _fine,_ " he assured her and it was mostly true; he still felt a little tired, but another few hours of sleep and he'd be alright. Besides, Port Dover wasn't that far away—if he left later that evening he'd get back to Fairy Tail by the morning, sleep most of the day, and then hopefully by then he'd figure out a way to bury Juvia's memory, to forget about this stupid job. It hurt, but things would settle back down, everyone would move along and eventually this feeling would fade.

"But Gray—'

"I need some space, Juvia, so back off—my head's all fucked up." _I can't stand to look at you. I don't want to think about you with another man._ He wasn't nearly brave enough to say those words. One day, when he was less likely to rage, he'd say them and they wouldn't mean a thing.

Juvia's lip quivered but then she squared her shoulders. "Alright."

Gray nodded and rolled back over. He closed his eyes and pretended to sleep once more. Finally, after a long, stretching and awkward moment, Juvia rose and left.

With her gone Gray turned on his back and stared at the ceiling until his eyes were dry.

* * *

"Every time I see you you're miserable," Sting told Juvia as she walked out of Gray's room.

She met his eyes and couldn't fully choke back the misery. She fought off the urge to go to him and bury her head in his shoulder. Above her head a cloud was struggling to form. Wouldn't that be wonderful? A rainstorm indoors…. Was it always going to be the highest of highs and the lowest of lows for her? Lately, yes. She thought when she and Gray moved in together that things would change, and then he disappeared and she had nearly broken apart, but then when he had returned again… she shook her head vigorously.

Gray Fullbuster…

What was she thinking?

"Hey," Sting tried to grab her hand when she moved by but Juvia shrugged him off.

"Not now, Sting."

"Come on, Juvia." He tried to pull her back by catching her hip and swinging her around. Juvia stumbled against his chest and looked into his face. The frown she wore was severe, eyes troubled. Usually he could coax a response from her with a touch, but not now. His fingers loosened. "What's going on?"

"Just leave me alone, okay?" She didn't want to blame him; this certainly wasn't his fault, but she was starting to feel irrational and knew she had to leave before she said anything she would regret.

"Did that asshole say something to you?" He could be pissed at Gray—that was easy and welcomed. He understood how to fix problems like those. "Because I say fuck him, he can't just be hot and cold and expect you to wait around forever. If he's pissed about us, tell him to put on his big boy panties and man the fuck up."

Juvia pressed her lips into a straight line. "Just stop it, Sting." Her voice had a hard bite to it that she'd never used on him before. He flinched and fully loosened his hold; Juvia slipped from his hands like water through the cracks and trundled down the hall.

He let her go, admittedly out of his depth. He didn't know how to build smiles; his specialty was tearing them down. He glanced at Gray's door, tempted to go in there and let the icy twit know just what he thought of him. It was a hard thing to walk away but somehow he managed, going back to find his old stool at the bar again.

* * *

It was well past noon when Juvia finally pulled herself together enough to realize that she maybe owed Sting an apology. She stood, wiped dampness from her cheeks and fixed her hair just enough so that it wasn't twisted around her face, then stepped out into the hall.

It was there she realized the flaw in her plan: she had no idea where Sting's room was, or if he had checked out. She resigned herself to braving the front desk and prayed that they'd tell her what she wanted to know.

She pushed open the door to the lobby, imagining what she'd have to say to get the information she needed, when her eyes landed on the blonde man sitting at the bar; he drew her in like a moth to the flame with his cheek propped up on his fist, a bored expression on his face, and a near-empty beer in hand.

On the opposite side of the bar, a rosy-haired beauty smiled charmingly at him and leaned forward, her breasts piled high and nearly spilling out of her low-cut shirt. She touched his arm gently and grabbed another beer from under the countertop, opening it for him. Juvia stubbornly ignored the twang of jealousy that bloomed in her chest and tried to pretend it was something else, like indigestion or a mild heart attack. That was preferable.

Right?

 _You're absolutely insane,_ but she ignored that, too.

She screwed up her courage and went to Sting's side.

As soon as she drew close he sat up, boredom evaporating. A new expression slid in place, one that she couldn't identify but had her heart thumping fast. She could admit, however silently, that she liked it when he looked at her like that, eyes full of intrigue and interest. Loving him would be a wild and unpredictable ride, full of bad decisions, raucous nights and not enough moments of sweetness.

It was tempting.

She loved the way he made her feel, uninhibited and alive, the way he made her forget everything…

"Hey," Sting said in a low voice when Juvia came near. He spoke gently as if she were a frightened deer.

Juvia smiled sheepishly. "Hey."

He relaxed under that smile, thinking maybe he had overreacted, things weren't as strained as they seemed. "What's a girl like you doing in a dive like this?" he joked.

"I wanted to apologize for earlier," she began.

Sting nodded. He was a pretty laid back guy, there was a lot he could take. "Yeah, no worries. We're good."

She sat down so their knees were nearly touching. "Alright." The bartender was listening too intently for Juvia's liking. She gave the girl a dark look and she took the hint, wandering away. "It's just, you know, you really freaked me out yesterday morning when you said that stuff, and then our job didn't go well, and Gray got hurt…"

There was only one thing he heard. "I freaked you out?"

"Yeah. I thought you meant what you said about…" Her cheeks heated. "You know, about us getting serious, but then last night in the shower you said we should just—and Gray—"

Sting was feeling just drunk enough to be brave. "I wasn't fucking around."

"What?"

"Yeah." He grabbed her hand; the skin was cool and smooth. "This thing we got, I like it."

"Yeah, so do I, that's why it worked, but Sting—"

"I think it's time we changed the dynamic a bit."

Her ears roared. "What are you saying?"

"We go exclusive," he said with confidence, as if she couldn't say anything other than yes.

She most certainly could. Fear dragged at her heart. "That wasn't ever part of the deal, Sting. We agreed that we were only letting off a little steam—"

"Things change." He tried to pull her closer but she resisted.

"I don't know if that's such a good idea—"

"Why? Because of your ice boy?" Agitation crept into his voice. He worked to swallow it back but only managed to choke.

"I think I really hurt him," she said sadly.

Sting shook his head. "Wake up, Juvia. He doesn't give a fuck. I'm sick of hearing about Gray this and Gray that. Who's been taking care of you all this time, huh? It sure wasn't your 'Gray-sama'. You've been waiting for him for a long time, and I'm here to tell you it's not going to happen, so just know when to cut the strings and move on."

His words hit her like a bullet in the chest. "Shut up." Why did he have to say it like that?

"Why, because you know it's true?" He said the words to wound and wasn't disappointed when she recoiled.

"And you're such a better choice, right?" Juvia's voice rose alarmingly.

"At least I've been honest with you this whole time," he spat back, glad that she didn't just buckle, that she wanted to fight. "I didn't bugger off on you for most of the year—I was just fucking you but I had the decency to tell you when I was going out of town for a week."

Juvia swallowed around the lump in her throat and stood.

"Where are you going?" Sting asked, suddenly sure he had gone too far.

"Away from you."

He clenched the neck of his beer bottle. "Juvia, wait. I didn't mean—I'm not very good at this—"

She wasn't listening. She whirled on her heel and left, preferring the calm coolness of the streets to the stifling room and too-curious eyes.

"Juvia!"

She flipped him off and kept going.

* * *

Sting winced when the door slammed closed. He sat that way, half turned towards the exit, beer bottle clenched too hard, for several long moments, trying to determine whether or not to follow her. And what would he say? ' _Hey, this is what we agreed to but I'm suddenly having seconds thoughts and want something more_ ,' didn't seem to go to well, though admittedly he hadn't been nearly so eloquent. Insulting her wanna-be boyfriend hadn't been the ticket, either. And that bit about Gray ditching her for months? That sure went over well. Why did he think that was going to endear her to him?

 _Think of something better to say._ Nothing came to mind, as if he _wanted_ to sabotage this. He pressed his palms into his eyes until he saw white spots and sighed. He didn't ever think he was a one-trick pony, but when it came to figuring out a way to apologize to her and get her back, he was coming up grievously blank.

"Girlfriend issues?" the bartender drawled, coming in close once more now that Juvia was gone.

Sting grunted noncommittally. "Just girl issues."

"Mmhmm. Want another beer? This one on me?"

Sting finally slid his eyes over and really looked at the girl. She was young and pretty, not in the way Juvia was, captivating and intense, but sweet.

"Yeah, whatever," he agreed. "But I'll get it."

She smiled gently. "How about this, you tell me more about that guild your master of and we'll call it even, huh? Sabretooth—you guys are really good. I followed all of your matches at the Grand Magical Games last year and I'm actually a huge fan of yours. Dragon slayers are really awesome."

He almost rolled his eyes but it was nice to be praised after that dismal display. Besides, if it helped clear his head a bit, he'd welcome the distraction. "Sounds like a deal." He waved his fingers and the girl placed another beer in his hand.

* * *

It was just after dinner when Gray finally dragged himself out of bed. He ordered a light meal through room service, not really feeling hungry but going through the motions, then contacted the mayor while he waited for his food.

"I saw the… uh... evidence of your success," the man said haltingly as if he didn't quite know how to broach the subject. His face was painted a hectic red that stretched up over his wrinkled forehead and onto his too-large ears. "There were a lot of animals that were trapped in that ice."

Gray winced. He hadn't thought of that.

"I keep getting calls from citizens. They don't like seeing bunnies half-frozen, you understand."

"It didn't go exactly as planned," he said, ignoring the first rule Gramps had ever taught him—always pretend like you knew what you were doing even when you were just winging it, it made others confident in your work.

"We have people out there trying to cut them out still." The mayor was unimpressed and, now that he had gained some steam, wasn't afraid to show it. He glowered furiously and tapped his fingers against a thick wooden desk. Gray thought if they were in the same room the mayor might have taken to throttling him; communication lacrima were a godsend.

"I had to explain to a woman this morning _why_ she suddenly woke up to January and the birds in her backyard were frozen solid." He was so angry spittle flew from his lips.

"It was an accident," Gray explained weakly. He felt terrible; his magic hadn't been this wild in a long time. "It just… got away from me."

Gray wouldn't have believed it was possible, but the mayor's face was only getting redder; sweat prickled his brow. "Is this the kind of magic I can expect from Fairy Tail?"

"No, sir." _Awesome. Really fucking awesome Gray_. Usually it was Natsu and Erza that messed up like this, not him. It was disorienting being on the other side of the table, unable to take the highroad.

The obese man puffed out his chest. "I suggest you go out there and fix this before you leave, otherwise all of Fiore will know how Fairy Tail conducts its business."

"Fix it?" Gray repeated numbly.

"Yes, idiot boy. Melt this ice, turn my city back to the way it was!"

He was too disjointed to be anything but candid. "I don't know if I can."

The mayor pulled at the collar of his shirt so he could breathe easier, nostrils flaring, cheeks puffing slightly. "What kind of answer is that? This is your magic, isn't it?"

No. Not entirely. "Yes," he said instead because that was the easier explanation.

The mayor nodded. "Then I don't see the problem. Get out there and rectify this atrocity at once before more creatures lose their lives and I get _more_ hate mail."

Gray nearly sighed. He wanted to leave behind Port Dover, had two feet out the door, but knew if word of this got back to Master...

It wasn't going to be a good scene.

"So? Are you going to or what?"

"Sure," Gray said with more conviction then he felt. "I'll take care of it." He hoped. It was an awful lot of ice to melt, a massive swatch of land.

"Good. Let me know when it's fixed." He scowled for good measure.

"Alright." Gray cut off the communication and scrubbed his hands over his face. He felt like crap, like he didn't want to try to melt so much ice. He rubbed his arm where it ached and chanced a glance at it. Was the blackness stretching all on its own? He couldn't be sure, but it certainly seemed that way. He tried to bully it back down to where he thought it should be but it wouldn't budge. That scared him; it was another trip to Porlyusica when he got back home. She had helped him with it once before and it looked like he was going to have to rely on her once again. All that work they did, practically undone by a moment of carelessness.

He would have rather gone straight there but he couldn't leave Port Dover under three feet of ice. He'd never hear the end of it.

He huffed and got dressed. To get his mind off his hungry magic he thought (perhaps foolishly) of Juvia. He wondered where she was now—if she was with Sting, if she was kissing him, if she was leaning into him and not turning _him_ down.

His jaw hurt and he realized he had been clenching his teeth so hard they creaked. _Stop thinking about it. Get out, go fix this ice rink, and then get home_. Once he was back at Fairy Tail things would be better. He had no idea how that could be so, but at this point he was willing to try for a little bit of optimism.

He looked through the window to the darkening world. The rising moon glinted off the icy surface beyond the hotel and he was again flabbergasted by the vast amount of area he had frozen.

 _Silver once froze a whole village._

But he wasn't his father. The mark on his arm twanged again, reminding him that he had pushed it too far earlier. The area was cold, the magic pushing and pulsing, hungry.

Devil slayer magic...

Hungry magic.

He swallowed tightly and ran his hands through his hair. _You're still good. Just go deal with this and you can go back to Fairy Tail. You can go back to Porlyusica. You can lose yourself in controlling this and forget about Juvia._ His new power hadn't given him much trouble over the year since he and Porlyusica started working together to tame it, but that bit of exertion had it fighting for freedom, for destruction, once more.

That thought gave him purpose and thusly the strength to turn from the window and exit the room.

The hallway was empty, his steps echoing. As he walked he was reminded of yesterday morning when he had come down for breakfast and saw Juvia leaning against Sting. It was that image that had him hesitating by the lobby doors. What would he see this time?

 _You can't hide forever_. He balled his hand into a fist so tight his fingers creaked, then pushed into the lobby, holding his head higher, prouder, than he had any right to. It was all a boisterous act, a front, a façade just in case they were together behind those doors. He could pretend to be unaffected; he was good at that.

He found Sting immediately. The slayer leaned over the bar, a half-drunk beer in hand and several more littering the surface around him. He grinned widely at the bartender and spoke in a low voice, a coy tilt to his mouth. Gray glowered for a whole new reason that had less to do with Juvia and more with his own ego. Suddenly Sting had it all. Or maybe he always had and Gray had just never noticed before.

 _And you shouldn't be now._

He put the exit in his sights, determined to leave while he could to avoid an awkward scene, but it was difficult not to drag his feet and listen to Sting's conversation. The bartender asked him questions about being master, a bright, excited gleam in her eye, and Sting was all too happy to answer. Gray's eyes were drawn over against his will. The woman leaned into the dragon slayer and flicked her long, coral coloured hair around her finger, smiling flirtatiously. Gray grumbled. What was so great about that guy? Was it the whole master thing? It had to have been, because he was an asshat at best, a braggart and a—

"Hey, it's Frostbite. Where you off to, man? Running back to Fairy Tail?" Sting called, finally noticing his audience.

Gray bristled. _Keep walking_. That's what he should do. It was a younger Gray Fullbuster that would stop and pick a fight, not he.

Sting kept on going. "Off to play on some ice again? Don't go too far, eh? It'll save me from looking when I have to carry your ass back."

The ice mage closed his eyes for a second and tried to breathe calmly. _You can just keep walking._

Sting sneered. "You want some grippies for your shoes, man? Make sure you don't slip?" His voice was slurred and full of laughter. "On second thought, it did help me win some brownie points with Juvia, so maybe you should go on so she can thank me again for bringing her boy back." He knew she would likely do no such thing, not with the way they had left things, but he did enjoy seeing Gray stiffen. Misery loved company.

Gray's fingernails bit into his palm. _He's drunk, just keep going._ It was hard. His eye twitched with barely contained fury. _Keep walking._

The exit was in sight. Just a little further. It was hard to focus through all that red rage and embarrassment. He would have rather been left on the ice to freeze. _You're an ice mage, how could you let that happen? What the fuck is wrong with you_? All kinds of things.

"You just going to walk away? Don't have anything to say to me? Not even a, 'Hey, Sting, thanks for carrying my useless ass back?" He laughed as if it were the most hilarious thing, buckling over at the waist and gripping his ribs.

Gray felt his neck heat and knew he couldn't leave it there. He stopped and turned, hatred making his body hum with energy. "Get up."

Sting straightened, the smile finally dropped from his face but his eyes still glinted with mirth. "Icy queen's a little upset? There's no reason to be ashamed, all I want is a thanks, man. Let's have it."

 _Walk away,_ but it was too late now. He used to be shotgun; brash and hotheaded. He'd thought he'd grown out of that long ago, but as he stared down Sting he realized he had been wrong, he was still good to go whenever, given the right circumstance, and Sting was stacking up the cards nicely. Better even than Natsu could. He wondered if you had to be a world-class jackass to be a dragon slayer. Maybe it was just a thing? The thought made him smirk depreciatively. Humorless. "How about a, 'fuck you,' instead?"

The bar in the lobby quieted.

"Yeah?" Sting asked. He rose, slightly unsteady. Gray's skin prickled with the first pangs of adrenaline. His slayer's mark itched, the muscles underneath cramped. _That will kill him_. He almost didn't care. Very nearly. _Don't let it control you._

Sting cracked his knuckles, totally indifferent to the coolness filling the room.

A man spoke up from the table at the back. "You better just take that outside. Some of us are actually trying to have a good time here."

Clenching his jaw, Gray turned and pushed open the door roughly. He didn't have to check at his back to know that Sting followed. The man stumbled into a couple of chairs and sent them sprawling. How much had he drank? Too much. Enough to be plenty stupid.

Gray knew he was going to enjoy knocking him down a few pegs.


	8. Chapter 8

The air outside the hotel was artificially brisk, Gray's devil slayer ice cooling the surrounding area enough that now when the ice mage exhaled his breath condensed. A breeze blew through his hair, throwing it in front of his eyes. He pushed it back impatiently and turned to face Sting. The dragon slayer leaned against one of the large pine trees outside of the hotel, hands stuffed in his pockets. On his face was a lazy, crooked grin. The drunk in his eyes had cleared slightly with the prospect of a real fight on his hands.

Sting said, "I've been waiting for this for a long time."

Gray wished he could say the same, wished that maybe he had been privy to Sting and Juvia's relationship before yesterday, that he hadn't spent the last day blindsided. _That's not what this is about. It's about making him shut his stupid mouth. It's about regaining some dignity._ There was plenty of that, but Juvia definitely fit into the equation somewhere, there was no sense in lying to himself—although he didn't have to be happy about it.

"Stop talking and let's do this." His father's magic pulsed, wanting to break free and wreak some damage. _Don't use it. It's too much._ But devil slayer magic had a mind of its own, especially when he felt so irritated and out of control. A thin whip of ice lashed out and broke across Sting's jaw, drawing a long, thin line of blood. Gray's lips peeled back, revealing a bare-toothed smile, pleased for an instant by that red.

Sting wiped his hand across his jaw, a furrow forming between his brows. "Really? The face?"

"What, are you too pretty for a real fight?" Gray asked, looking to antagonize.

It worked exactly as he had hoped. Sting snarled and launched himself, magic all but forgotten. He collided hard, shoulder digging into Gray's chest. Gray stumbled then tumbled to the ground, dragging Sting with him. He hit hard, a small boulder digging into his ribs from behind. For a moment he was totally breathless. Sting took advantage of Gray's gasping, and jammed his fist into his ribs. Gray would have grunted but he didn't have any air left to breathe. The dragon slayer snarled and sat up straight, his legs on either side of Gray's, and grabbed Gray roughly by the collar of his shirt. The material protested loudly when Sting yanked him up and punched him hard in the jaw.

Gray saw white spots and lost feeling in half of his face. Sting reeled back to hit again; Gray made a fist of his own and lashed out blindly, getting the other man in the side of the ear. Sting jarred back, his hold loosening. Gray tried to suck in another breath and was permitted, his lungs no longer seizing. He pushed Sting back; the dragon slayer weaved then fell hard on his rump, allowing Gray to scramble to his knees. He wiped his bleeding nose on his sleeve, the blood bright when illuminated by the hotel's outside lights. He hadn't noticed them coming on with the setting sun. In the dimness he realized that he and Sting had gathered a bit of a crowd. People from inside the hotel pressed against the bar's windows, trying to get a better view of the drama.

Distracted, Gray didn't realize Sting had recovered until his shirt was grabbed and the dragon slayer tried to slam his forehead into his nose. Gray twisted his head to the side just in time to catch the attack across his cheekbone instead. His face exploded in pain again, the bones protesting loudly. Though it hurt, he knew he had been lucky; had he not turned, the blow would have broken his nose and the fight would have been over.

Sting stumbled to his feet and blinked his eyes clear, realizing he was drunker than he should have been if this was a fight he wanted to easily win. Gray got up, too, and came after him again, moving quickly.

Too slow by half, he couldn't rightly dodge Gray's next attack when the devil slayer lunged in, grabbed him by the shoulders and jammed his knee into Sting's groin. Sting blanched and groaned and curled over the area, all of his alcohol trying to come back up. His skin slicked in sweat, the breath in his lungs shortened by the aching between his legs.

Gasping, he said, "That was weak, dude. Low blow." Opening his mouth to talk felt like encouraging himself to vomit. He swallowed thrice and forced his spine erect.

Gray ignored Sting's words, feeling adrenalized and violent. He curled his hand into a tight fist and swung, realizing too late that he was back to using magic, that it had slipped from his tight hold and his hand was more of a block of ice than a fist.

Sting blocked. Not only was he too slow, he hadn't been expecting the magical attack. Gray easily busted through his defense. Sting's head cracked back, the taste of copper filled his mouth. He wavered, seeing stars for two whole heartbeats until the black of unconsciousness started sneaking into his vision.

 _No, no, no_. It wasn't time to fall yet. Gray still had to get his. Yet he was falling anyway, the ground rushing up to meet first his knees, then his chest. His cheek landed last, kissing the cold earth. All he could see was dirt and half-frozen grass, the very tips of the blades catching the light of the hotel and refracting it a million times.

His eyes drooped.

* * *

It was a struggle to halt his movements. For a dark instant, Gray imagined himself continuing, imagined Sting painted red. Already the dragon slayer bled sluggishly from his mouth. It would take almost no effort at all to just hold him still and—

 _Let go. He's not a demon, he's just a man. You don't have to finish him off._

He hardly felt rational.

 _Save it for END._

Gray dragged in a tight breath, the air reeking of iron. Slowly the ice disappeared from his hand. He pushed at Silver's mark next, forcing it into a more manageable size so he could feel more like a man and less like a weapon. It only helped some, the blackness retreating from his neck but keeping its hold on his chest. It would have to do, for now.

 _Now turn away from Sting and leave him._

That was harder to do than he thought but somehow he managed.

His hands shook so he stuffed them in his pockets, blood stains and all. He didn't want to think about the loss of control, about the blind rage and mindlessness; he just wanted to go melt some ice, head back to Fairy Tail, and find a way to forget about Juvia.

Easy peasy.

* * *

Juvia was just coming around the side of the building, feeling cooler, calmer, when she heard a flurry of voices.

"Is he alright?"

"I don't know, that guy hit him pretty hard."

"He's bleeding."

"Yeah, but only from the mouth."

"Is he breathing?"

There was a thick crowd of people all standing in a circle. She stood on tiptoe, curious despite herself. She couldn't see anything through the sea of shoulders.

"What's going on?" she asked a young woman on the outside of the group.

"The master of Sabretooth just had his ass kicked," she said in a gush, her cheeks high with colour, eyes bright with excitement.

The bottom dropped out of Juvia's stomach. "What?"

"Yeah, and now he won't wake up—hey, where are you going?"

Juvia stopped listening. She pushed through the crowd, using magic to cut a path when the people were too thick. That stunt earned her a lot of gripes and words of disproval when they got soaked. She didn't care.

The crowd thinned near the center and she didn't have to fight so hard. Still, she was rough when she broke through, needing to get there to see if he was okay. There had been no mistake, she'd recognize Sting's pale blonde hair anywhere. Seeing him there, splayed out against the ground and covered in blood, Juvia's heart stopped for a second, a sob catching in her throat.

"Sting?" _Is that really my voice,_ she wondered? It sounded airless. When he didn't answer she fell to her knees and grabbed his face in her hands. "Sting?"

A man over her shoulder said, "He's out, lady—"

"What the hell are you all standing around for?" Juvia barked. "Go get him some help or back off!"

Sting groaned and her heart squeezed.

"Sting?"

His eyes pinched, then opened. They were glazed; it took a long time between blinks for him to actually focus on her. "Juvia?"

Juvia almost collapsed with relief. The people around her chattered loudly; she drowned them out. "Are you alright?"

He lifted a hand up to his jaw dazedly and rubbed the growing bruise there. "Where did he go?"

Her tongue felt nailed to the roof of her mouth; she made herself ask, "Who?"

"Gray? Where is he?"

"Gray did this to you?" She didn't want to believe it, but who else? She felt numb.

Sting scowled but didn't answer. He tried to sit up and mostly failed.

Juvia debated leaving him like that, for a moment too furious with both him and Gray— and herself, she couldn't forget _that—_ but then he fell back again and she sighed. "Come on," she said and locked his arm around her shoulder. As soon as he realized what she was doing he made to form a protest. Predicting his disagreement, Juvia said, "You can argue after I get you inside." After which she would then search for Gray to make sure he was okay. Then again, judging from the state of her dragon slayer, she'd say Gray was just dandy. _Sting isn't mine._ And yet, he kind of was.

Sting grumbled, bringing her back to the issue at hand. "I don't need your help," he denied.

"You're a damn liar," she spat back. "Just be quiet and help me…"

Sting didn't want her help, but he couldn't spend the night on the ground and his head spun too much to stand on his own. A look around told him that the crowd he and Gray drew was quickly dispersing now that he was awake. When the last straggler turned away and started heading back into the hotel he said, "Fine, help me up."

Juvia pulled him in tight and started the long clamber to her feet. It took a lot of attempts, much cursing on both their parts, and the use of the huge pine outside of the hotel to get Sting upright. Once he was there he leaned heavily on her, partially because he was drunk and partially because he was still woozy from the shot Gray gave him. The truth only darkened his already miserable mood. He didn't lose to guys like Gray Fullbuster. In fact, he very rarely lost at all. Defeat tasted bitter.

"Come on, it's this way." Juvia's legs wobbled beneath her when she took her first step. Afraid that he was going to drag her down to the ground with him if he fell, Sting put forth his best effort to lurch forward. Between his legs still ached, the pain only jarred with each step. _Fucking Frostbite,_ he thought bitterly.

Inside the hotel people watched them carefully, but no one said a word. When Sting dared to lift his gaze, people found something more interesting to look at. His bruised pride throbbed. He was the fucking _Master_ of Sabretooth. He didn't get his ass kicked by ice mages.

"Where is your room?" Juvia asked, breaking through his depreciation.

"Second floor," he said and pointed vaguely towards the elevator.

Juvia huffed and began the trek over. Her brow was beaded with sweat by the time they stood out front of the metal doors. "I just wanted you to know, even though I'm bringing you upstairs, I'm really mad at you."

"I like you better when you're mad." He grinned dumbly, trying to regain some composure. Juvia wasn't fooled; the smile didn't reach his eyes.

"And I like you better when you're not drunk and covered in blood," she muttered.

Sting tightened his arm around her shoulders but didn't disagree; he was a wreck.

The elevator dinged, signaling its arrival. Juvia shuffled in and jammed the number two button. They were moving in short order, and stopping just as fast. The door opened, spitting them out into a hall that was very similar to the one Juvia was used to.

"Room twenty-five," Sting told her and tried to take the lead, drunk walking. Juvia hauled him back against her side before he could get too far away and started feeling his pockets for his keys.

"Little to the left," he told her with a wicked grin when she actually reached in to retrieve it.

She rolled her eyes. "I see you're in better spirits."

Well, his dick didn't hurt so much anymore, anyway, and getting the girl after he lost the fight… Maybe that was a better way to kick Gray Fullbuster in the balls, wasn't it? Rolling with that line of thought he praised her. "You're beautiful, Juvia."

Juvia peered at him crossways. He was infrequent with his compliments; they were usually reserved for moments when she was damp with sweat and moaning darkly, for moments he edged closer to orgasm, not for late-night stumbles through a hotel drunk and covered in blood.

"And you're hammered."

"Come on," he prodded. "You know I actually think that."

Without answering, she retrieved his key from his pocket just as they came to a stop in front of his room.

Sting, leaning back against the wall while Juvia fought with the door, asked, "You gonna come in with me?"

He was tenacious, she'd give him that. "For a bit," she agreed. "Then I have to go make sure Gray is alright."

Sting scowled. "What do I have to do to make you stay?"

It'd be so much more tempting if he weren't a mess. Her heart squeezed and she felt even more hopelessly lost. "Come on," she said and opened the door with authority. His room was almost identical to hers; the only difference was that his had burgundy drapes and hers were blue. She closed the door, set the key down on the nightstand and turned back to him. Sting was back to leaning against the wall, studying her closely with pale blue eyes. He was thinking something and judging by his expression she didn't know if she liked it.

"Here," she said to distract him. "This shirt's ruined." She tucked her fingers under the material and started pulling it over his head. Sting happily obliged. She hissed when she saw his exposed torso dotted by large welts left behind by Gray. She ran her fingers over the area gently.

Sting caught her hand. "Don't look at that."

"But Sting," she protested, "You're hurt." She felt horrible and responsible.

"I'm fine."

She didn't believe him. "Why did you fight with him?"

He looked at her stone-faced. "He's a twit."

He certainly _could_ be, she wasn't going to deny that, but _still_. "I've put you in a really bad position."

Sting pushed away from the wall and staggered into the bathroom where he turned on the taps, splashed water over his face and rinsed his mouth. "I don't see how," he said finally when his face was cleaned.

"I was using you when Gray ignored me—"

"I knew it, you knew it, so what's the issue?" he asked blandly.

Juvia blew out a short breath. "Sting, how can you say that? I don't want to see you like this." _Or Gray._ She kept that bit to herself thinking maybe he wouldn't appreciate it. "Everything's a mess."

His gaze softened and her heartbeat quickened; that gentle look was back in his eye, the one that never used to be in his repertoire.

He came out of the washroom looking soberer. "Stay with me."

"I can't, Sting, I have to go find Gray."

"Forget about him."

She shook her head. "What if he's hurt somewhere? Who's going to make sure he gets back okay?"

"Who cares?"

She looked at him sadly. "I do. I'll come back to check on you after, okay?"

"Juvia, trust me, he's fine. Don't go." He didn't want to have to beg but he would. He grabbed her hand and held it.

Juvia met his eyes guardedly.

"Don't look at me like that," he told her.

"Like what?"

"Like I'm the bad guy," he said plainly. He cupped her cheek. "I messed up before—I didn't mean what I said in the bar. Well…" he corrected, "I meant what I said, but I didn't say it very well."

Juvia stiffened.

"Come on, Juvia. You know he doesn't love you." Sting kissed her. He tasted ever so faintly of copper and pungently of beer.

"Neither do you," she replied when she could. Her veins pulsed with nervous energy.

"You know how I feel now?" he asked with a quirk of his brow.

Juvia bit her tongue hard. "Stop it, stop playing around—it's not funny, Sting."

He laughed depreciatively. "Maybe I'm not playing."

Her hands shook when she touched his bare chest. "I don't…"

"Are you scared?" He grabbed her wrists and brushed his mouth over hers again.

 _Yes._ But she was excited, too. Her skin crawled with goose bumps. She almost let him continue; that would be the easiest thing, and the thing that felt the best, but she couldn't, not while Gray was still wandering around by himself. _He could have left Port Dover you know_? But she didn't think so.

She pulled back with some difficulty. "I have to go."

Sting's relaxed expression turned into a frown. "Juvia—"

"I'll come by and check on you after," she promised again and wormed out of his grasp. "I just have to make sure he's okay."

She was out the door before he could protest. He shoved his hands through his hair and swallowed a growl, just barely resisting the urge to put his fist through the wall.

* * *

Though Juvia didn't know where to go, there was a faint tinge of magic that bounced through the air, something familiar and cold, something that felt like Gray. She followed it beyond the hotel's property towards the foothills once more, a candle-singed moth to the coldest flame.

It didn't take long for the ground to change and become ice. When it did, she hesitated at the edge of the ring of destruction, slightly awed, slightly anxious.

The familiar magic pulsed again and Juvia made herself step onto that rink. It was slippery, the surface smooth and uninterrupted. It hadn't melted a single inch since Gray casted the spell hours and hours before. Devil slayer ice was different—she knew this fact, but knowing and seeing it in action were very different things.

"Gray?" she called out tentatively. She couldn't see him in the darkness but she could _feel_ him. Devil slayer magic rising once more, her skin prickled, arm hair standing on end.

"Gray?" There was still no reply. She went closer to the epicenter of the cold temperatures though every nerve in her body was telling her to get out of there.

"Gray?" Why was he gathering so much energy? Juvia opened her mouth to draw a breath to call him one more time, but there was no oxygen left to breathe.

The power singing through the atmosphere reached a pinnacle and then erupted, buffeting against her hard enough to knock her back on her rump. She slid over the ice for several feet until it disappeared, torn away by Gray's magic, then she was suddenly sitting on gravel and mud and grass. She squeaked and scrambled upright, damp now, and whirled around. She found his silhouette just meters away.

Her heart beat so hard it felt like it was trying to burst through her chest. "Gray? You scared the hell out of me."

By the light of the moon she saw him stiffen and sway. It looked like maybe he'd fall, then he regained his composure. He turned to face her; Juvia couldn't see much, even with the moon it was dark, but she saw how his eyes glinted in the gloom, his magic changing him so he wasn't really his own. Fear pierced through her. Unwilling to give into that irrationality—it was _Gray_ after all—she smothered the feeling and told herself that she had nothing to be frightened of.

"Juvia," he sounded surprised to see her. "What are you doing out here?"

She brushed the damp leaves and grass from her backside then hooked her thumbs in her belt loop rather awkwardly. "I just wanted to make sure you were okay. You melted all the ice?" The power made sense now at least, and she was glad there didn't seem to be any real danger.

He rubbed a hand over his face; he seemed exhausted. "The mayor asked me to. He was getting complaints."

"Oh." She hadn't thought of that. She scolded herself for being so self-centred recently. She cleared her throat. "So… are you?"

"Huh?"

"Okay," she explained. "I found Sting. You roughed him up pretty bad. Did he hurt you at all?"

He _tch_ ed and looked away. "I'm fine, it's that pretty boy dragon slayer that was on the ground, wasn't it?"

Juvia exhaled noisily.

Gray glanced at her sideways and said, "Don't feel bad for him, Juvia, he got less then what he deserved."

She wasn't even going to dignify that with a response. "Why were you fighting?"

"Because he's a prick," he said easily. "I thought that would have been obvious."

"Really? You picked a fight because you didn't like the guy?" That wasn't like the Gray she knew at all.

"Hey, he asked for it," Gray said in his defense. "I was just going to keep on walking, but he couldn't keep his damn mouth shut."

She closed her eyes for a second and made herself ask, "It wasn't because of us? Because of earlier, was it?" She was imagining again his fingers curling through her hair, his mouth on hers, though it was a guilty memory, one that warred with Sting's odd, half-proclamation moments ago and confident kisses.

Gray laughed humorlessly. "Not everything is about you, Juvia, the guy just has a big mouth."

She was thankful for the darkness that hid her flush. "Right. He's good enough at causing trouble all on his own." Sting didn't ever need any sort of ammunition; he was a master of creating conflict.

Gray looked at her curiously. In the dimness she saw his mouth turn down in a frown; something like a shadow passed over his skin.

Juvia asked, "What are you thinking?"

She wasn't really expecting an answer, but Gray surprised her. "What would you say if I told you to choose?"

"Choose?"

"Between us." Gray prowled closer, suddenly intense, a shadow in the soft blanket of darkness. "Who would you pick, Juvia?"

She opened her mouth to say ' _you'_ , but closed it again. She had never given Sting much serious thought, but their earlier conversation had her head spinning, her mind blanking. She didn't know. _You're the worst_. "I don't know," she said honestly, though she knew it would push him away.

He pressed his cracked hands against her cheeks. "You used to." _It used to always be me._

She hadn't realized he'd gotten close enough to touch her. "Gray—"

He kissed her before she could talk and ruin things again. He twisted his fingers through her hair and held her still. His tongue butted against her lips and after a second in which she struggled internally, trying to determine if she should pull back or draw him in close, she gave in and opened for him. His mouth was hot when everything else was cold. He kissed her until she was dizzy, until he was pawing at her desperately and Juvia was mindlessly grasping at the edges of her shirt because she couldn't stand all the layers between them. Gray had his hands up under the fabric and splayed against her ribs before he pulled back.

"And what about now?" his voice had gone low and raspy.

She trembled, skin too sensitive. "Um…"

Then his voice got sharp. "You have no fucking idea." He broke out of her hold.

"Wait," she pleaded.

Gray shook his head, frustrated and confused and annoyed with himself and her. "This can't happen. We?" He pointed frantically between them. "Can't happen."

Her skin heated. "You're the one that kissed me."

"Only to show you how fucked up you were." It wasn't true, but he couldn't tell her that it was because he couldn't stop thinking about it.

Tears pricked at her eyes. Juvia swallowed them down viciously. She wouldn't cry. "Gray, please—"

"Just stop."

Anger flashed through the water mage. "You know—I'm not sorry I was with Sting." As soon as she said it she regretted the words, but she wouldn't stop— _couldn't._ "You can't decide one minute you don't want me, then kiss me the next because you're upset I'm with someone else, and get mad when I get confused! You've been pushing me away for years—what the _hell_ was I supposed to do?"

Gray drove his hands through his hair. "Seriously, Juvia?"

"What do you mean, _seriously_? Of _course_ seriously! You've been telling me again and again you don't want to be with me!"

"I _can't_ be with you," Gray lashed out.

"Yes you can! If you told me right now you were serious, I'd break things off with Sting once and for all, but you just _won't_."

"There are things I need to do," Gray told her.

"Yeah, confuse me," she said meanly.

Gray's eyes narrowed. "I need to find END, Juvia. I need to destroy him— _it_."

Juvia threw her arms wide. "I'm not stopping you."

Gray shook his head again. "You don't get it. Having you around, worrying about what you're doing, if you're getting hurt, if Zeref's strongest demon is going to kill me and then everyone I care for—is just going to be a distraction."

"Then just forget about the stupid demon!" Juvia's voice was rising dangerously, but she couldn't help it. "Let someone else kill it."

"I can't just _let someone else_ do it." He held up and tapped his father's mark for emphasis. "This won't let me walk away."

She didn't understand what it was about his devil slayer's mark that compelled him to find and destroy demons, but she understood it was a powerful force. "When you go after END take me with you. We'll be stronger together."

Which is exactly what he thought she'd say. "You could die."

"So could you," she said stubbornly. "It's a risk I'm willing to take."

"Not me," he replied shortly.

"Well, you don't get to make all the decisions!" She very nearly stomped her foot against the ground like a child but caught it before she could embarrass herself.

"This time I do! It's my responsibility, Juvia, and I say you stay out of it."

"Gray—"

"Stay away from me." He said with finality, unable to listen any more. Frustration had him turning and putting Port Dover in sight.

"Gray, don't you dare walk away! Not until we finish this!" she spat, rallying her anger and using it as bravery.

"It's done."

She tried to capture his hand and pull him back. "It's not!"

But Gray was wrung out; he couldn't even consider another fight, physical or otherwise, he was used up. He yanked out of her grasp and walked faster.

Juvia was so furious her mouth moved on its own. "Gray! If you walk away now—" But she couldn't bring herself to finish the threat. He didn't stall the way she wanted him to, just stuffed his hands deep into his pockets and kept on going.

She hated him in that moment.


	9. Chapter 9

The last train to leave Port Dover departed at 11:30 PM. Gray made sure he was on it, sitting in the back of the cart with his hood pulled high, face hidden deep inside the fabric so as to not draw attention to his peculiar appearance. Melting the ice had taken a lot of energy. Energy he'd used to keep his father's mark in check. With most of his defenses breeched, his body throbbed with coldness, a large swatch of his skin stained black. No matter what he did, it wouldn't recede. He bit his cheek hard to keep himself centered when he felt like slipping away on the lulling tide of magic.

A young woman wearing a blue halter top and a short pink skirt climbed on the train, walked all the way to the back and sat down beside him even though there were other free seats.

Though she couldn't see his face she smiled warmly and said, "Hey, where are you headed?"

Gray sighed and rested his head against the window, not in the mood to small-talk.

"Hey, it's rude to ignore people you know?"

The world outside wasn't particularly interesting but Gray did his damn best to _act_ like it was.

"Are you mute? I knew a girl once that was. I can sign, if you want?"

His agitation grew and with it his magic. It didn't take much to make the seat under his body frost. He squeezed his fingers to keep it all inside. The girl nattered on, oblivious to the danger.

"And I can speak like, four different languages if you need." She listed them off and said a greeting in each, peering at him closely.

"Or maybe you're shy. You don't want to talk to me because I'm too cute, right?"

Man, she was vain.

"It happens sometimes. I don't blame you." She laughed and touched his arm. "I'm kidding. But really, can you talk?"

"Do you have an off switch?" Gray finally snapped when she determined he was deaf and started waving her hands in front of his face in complicated sign.

She stiffened. "You can speak."

"Yeah, I can, but I'm trying to travel in _peace_." His hood knocked back and she was privy to the stretching black mark that marred his right eye and extended all the way down his chin.

To her credit she was only silent for a moment before she asked, "Are you a demon?"

It was Gray's turn to stiffen. " _No,"_ he said with authority, remembering, unwelcomely, Deliorah destroying everything he'd ever held dear.

"Then what's wrong—"

"Do you ever _shut up_?"

"Really?" she fumed. "That's pretty—"

"We haven't even left the train station yet," Gray said slowly with forced calm. "Just. Be. Quiet."

It actually worked. For a short amount of time. As soon as the train started rolling she seemed to forget about his mini outburst and the strange mark on his face because she was talking again. A stewardess walked by with a cart of drinks. Gray grabbed the strongest they had—a miniature bottle of whisky. He palmed five of them despite her disapproving glare. It wasn't near enough to fog out the girl's chattering but he'd be damned if he didn't try.

* * *

Samantha Crane was the name of the chatterbox, and it turned out she was travelling to see her grandmother in Hargeon but making a stop in Magnolia overnight. Gray found that out because when the stewardess failed to give him any more alcohol, Samantha had offered him some of her own cinnamon whisky. The generosity had endeared her to him significantly, though she was what had spurred his impromptu drunkenness in the first place. After that, Samantha got less and less annoying with every shot he took. They passed the train ride with idle chatter that got personal rather quick, as things often did when alcohol was involved.

"So why are you living in Gloom Town?" She had a nice voice, fun and upbeat, to go with her smile, which Gray, now that he wasn't scowling at her, could admit was pretty alright.

"Gloom Town?" he repeated, confused.

She reached over and pinched his cheek hard where his mouth turned into a frown. "Look at that glower. That's patented, man. What's up?"

Gray rolled his head across the seat so he was looking at her sort of sideways and said against his better judgement, "There's this girl."

"Yeah," she said.

"This girl. This Juvia," he waved his hands loosely through the air, tracing a questionably human shape.

"Mmmhmm."

"And we've got this—this thing," he said vaguely.

"Things are good," Samantha replied with a laugh.

"Sometimes," he agreed, "But I guess I've been pushing her aside."

"Awe, Gray, come on," Samantha said. "Not another one of these stories."

"Hey man, it's my story, shut up," he scolded her.

She mocked zipping her lips. "Sorry, lover. Go on."

"Alright. We have this—"

"Yes, I get it, you have a thing. You kiss, you hug, you have messy, slippery sex, what next?"

Gray might have blushed if he wasn't so drunk. "It's not _that_ kind of thing."

Samantha paused, the bottle lifted halfway to her mouth.

"Excuse me, miss, you can't drink that on this train," said a blonde stewardess walking by.

"Sorry," Samantha muttered and put it back in her bag. The stewardess nodded her approval and moved off. Samantha yanked the bottle out of her bag again as soon as the stewardess was out of sight and switched seats, coming to sit beside Gray. "What do you mean, not that kind of thing? What other thing is there?"

Gray shrugged. "It's complicated." He hated that. _Complicated._ Juvia had given him the same line _._ What the fuck did that even _mean_?

Samantha mimicked his thoughts. "What does _that_ mean? That's bullshit."

"Seriously? You're really judgemental for a girl I just met," Gray complained.

"I'm just saying, do you love her?"

"I don't know. What kind of question is that?"

"Well, is she like your sister or do you want to kisssssss her?" She puckered her lips like a fish and mimed kissing the place before him.

Gray frowned as he remembered doing just that—with less puckering, of course, he didn't kiss like a sick moose; at least, he didn't _think_ so. "I guess I want to kiss her."

"Then what's the issue, man? Seems like you got all this figured out. Why are you bummed?"

Gray huffed. "She's messing around with another guy."

"Well that's a big assumption," Samantha protested.

"It's true, she told me herself," he complained.

"Hm… That's shitty. How long has she been with this guy for?"

"Months—no, more than a year."

She hissed with sympathy. "Sorry, pal. Sounds kinda serious."

"Don't apologize." Gray shook his head. "It's just… Juvia always came back. She'd get all creepy on me, I'd tell her to fuck off. She'd be mad for a few hours, then she'd be right back at it." It was a dynamic he found he actually missed, as perverse as that was. "I guess now it feels more real, with this shit with END, and Sting…"

"I see."

He screwed up his face. "What's that supposed to mean?"

She shrugged. "Nothing much."

"Really? You're so damn talkative except when you actually have something worth saying?"

"Well, I don't know the whole story, of course, but it sounds like maybe you were wrong together from the very start. I think it's good she's trying to figure stuff out with this new guy."

Gray sighed. "Yeah, maybe. I just want to stop thinking about her." He had other things he wanted to focus on, like finding and destroying END, killing Zeref… that was a busy schedule—there was no time to be thinking about Juvia.

Samantha nodded sympathetically and handed him the bottle again. "We all get one of them, lover, one that makes us rise and fall, breathe and need. They're usually the ones that trample on us. It's fucking sweet when you're in the thick of things, though."

He remembered tasting Juvia and couldn't disagree.

"You said she's blowing off some steam with another guy, huh?"

"Yeah," he agreed miserably.

"You ever considered doing the same?"

Gray snorted. "Nobody's got time for that."

"No one asked for more than a dime of your time. I think you're so wound up because you're not getting any _anywhere_. She's off playing around, so why can't you?" Samantha prodded.

Gray sighed. "Yeah. I wouldn't even know where to begin looking."

She smiled toothily. "I'm staying in Magnolia tonight."

* * *

Juvia leaned her forehead against the outside of Sting's door and breathed out a gentle sigh, not at all sure why she was there. _Just to check on him_ , she thought, but was afraid it was for another purpose, one she was reluctant to admit, even to herself.

The door opened and she nearly fell into the dragon slayer. Sting caught her around the waist and hauled her upright.

"You came back." He hadn't bothered putting on a shirt but he had showered and thrown on a pair of baggy sweat pants. Sting dragged her in and closed the door. "I thought you were blowing me off."

"I just wanted to make sure you were alright, then I'm going back to my room," she asserted. She didn't sound very sure, though, not even to her own ears, and she didn't pull away from him when she could have; it felt too good to be held tight.

Sting saw through her. He ran his hand over her spine and laid his lips against the corner of her jaw.

"Gray kissed me," Juvia said candidly. "Twice."

Sting stiffened, his kiss dried up. "Yeah?"

"Yes."

"That's what you wanted, right?"

"…Yes."

"And yet here you are."

She wished she could stop the flow of words but as soon as she started they all poured out. "He says we can't be together because he wants to go after END."

"He could take you with him, couldn't he?"

"He thinks I'll be a distraction."

"Sounds like an excuse to me," Sting said with a bit of savageness.

 _An excuse._

"He's been making them up for years. If it were me, I wouldn't give a damn about that stuff if it meant at the end of the day you and I ah—" He motioned to the bed and winked playfully.

Juvia blinked at him, not really in the mood for fun. "Are you always so sure with everything you do?"

"I like to keep things simple," he said with a quirking smile. "Like this." He kissed her. "Feels good, right?"

"Yeah." She couldn't deny that.

"So why overcomplicate things? Just stay here with me, I'll make you feel great, and you can forget about Frosttip."

"That stuff you were saying earlier…"

"Forget about that, too," Sting said and kissed her neck, making her shiver. "If this is all you want, then I think I'm good with that." And there was the confident voice in his mind that said Gray would never come around; they'd never have to stop. If this was all he got, then that was good enough.

Her fingers curled in his hair. "Juvia is a bad girl."

"The wickedest." He nipped her neck and couldn't help but ask, "Do you still love him?"

She barely hesitated when she said, "Not like I used to." Gray was losing quite a bit of his lustre, becoming a human and not quite a god she worshipped, and she had fallen quite a far way herself; she wasn't the woman she thought she was. She didn't know who Gray was without all that gleaming lacquer, and she didn't know what to think about this new, flawed Juvia Lockser to go along with him.

Where was all that hope that he would realize she loved him? That they'd be better together? She felt used up and forgotten like glitter in a gutter.

Sting kissed her temple. "Gotta lot of things happening in there, huh?"

Juvia pulled gently on his hair. "Help me forget about them?'

He was happy to oblige.

* * *

Gray's head spun. He dropped his keys twice and missed the lock hole three times trying to get into his house, not only shitty drunk but distracted by Samantha's mouth moving on his neck, her fingers grabbing his shoulders. She started roaming south, a playful laugh living in her chest because she knew she was muddling him badly. When she grabbed his dick Gray closed his eyes for a breath and entertained saying, _'fuck it,'_ and just undressing out there in the open. It was dark, it was late. How likely was it that anyone would see? And if they did… well, he didn't give much of a fuck right then.

That's what he thought, anyway, until he heard the sound of boots scuffing over the cobblestone sidewalk down the road. In the night a blonde girl and her boyfriend came out of the shadows. Gray straightened as much as he could and pushed Samantha's hand aside and tried again for the door. Samantha leaned against the doorframe and pushed her breasts together distractingly, rubbing them despite their audience. Gray got harder. _Open the door. Open the door._

He nearly celebrated when the key finally went in. The door opened and the familiar scent of his home wrapped around him, comforting when his head was such a mess. He grabbed Samantha's wrist and dragged her inside, slamming the door in their wake. First he flicked on the light, an automatic response, and found the brunette beside him. Her lips were red and used, her hair a tangle. Not blue, but soft brown curls. Gray turned off the light. Samantha didn't seem to care. She came for him and crushed her mouth to his. Something hard clacked against his teeth and he realized she had a tongue piercing. Her mouth felt very different than Juvia's.

"Stop thinking about her," Samantha said between kisses.

Easier said than done. He imagined what Juvia was doing with Sting at that moment. His chest burned cold. He tried to stamp out the feeling. It didn't work, so he redirected his ire, pouring it into this girl that asked to be used, grabbing her shirt and tearing it over her head. She was in a light green strapless bra. She grabbed that herself, forgoing undoing the back, and pulled it off. Her breasts spilled out, large and soft, the pink caps stabbed through with a thick barbell each. Gray's eyes dropped over her body and realized that she had another piercing as well, this one through her bellybutton.

He reached for her breasts. She pushed his hands aside. "Take your clothes off."

Gray did as he was told. He'd already lost his shirt somewhere. He hoped it was here in his house; he'd liked that one. His pants fell to the floor.

Samantha smiled when she saw him. "Good. Get down and lie back."

The ground was cold beneath his shoulders. He welcomed the startling feeling; it was the only thing that felt _right._ Warm skin pressed into either side of his hips. Realizing his eyes were closed, he opened them and gazed up at the girl lording above. She reached between her legs and opened herself wide for him to see. There was a flash of metal; a fifth piercing. When he raised his brows she smirked and kneeled down.

"You can touch me now." Her body hovered inches from his. Gray's heart thundered, his skin felt dry and superheated, prickly and uncomfortable. He imagined for a moment it was Juvia over top of him and felt her presence like a stab in the gut. He opened his mouth to tell _this_ girl that they should stop.

Instead he reached up and grabbed her heavy breasts.

 _Fuck_ Juvia. She obviously didn't feel too guilty when she was with Sting. So he wouldn't, either.

Samantha wriggled down, her body rubbing over his erection. He swallowed an anticipatory groan that was tinged with regret. He released her breasts and grabbed her hair, thinking maybe to pull her away from her trajectory. Samantha took his movements as an invitation and wriggled down further, despite the pain she must have felt when he pulled her hair too hard.

Her mouth closed over him, hot, her tongue ring strange and teasing.

Gray closed his eyes.

* * *

 **A/N:** Just so you know, it's weird as fuck going back through my old work and seeing how convoluted I was. Probably I still am. Maybe I'll keep writing and come back to this in a year and be like, what the fuck?


	10. Chapter 10

Sting's arms curled up beneath Juvia's shoulders, his body pinning her to the bed, his torso keeping her one leg wrenched high so she was spread open for him. Every time he slammed into her, the sound of flesh hitting flesh filled the space between their loud breaths. Juvia's moan was like music. Sting got harder, he worked faster.

"Tell me you love it."

"Yes," Juvia whimpered. "I love it. I love it. Please—"

He waited for his name.

"Sting, please."

There it was. "Master."

"Yes, Master. _Please_." Her voice was getting that high reedy whine it often did just before she came. He licked along her jaw and tasted salt. The motion made her body contract around his, squeezing his erection in the most amazing way.

"God," Juvia cried. "Damnit. Yes." The praises streamed out of her mouth, each one more elaborate than the last. He loved her when she was like this. Fuck. So much. His hips worked faster. Juvia's voice rose lewdly. Sensing what was coming, he grabbed her hair and forced her head up so she was looking at him, then he mashed their mouths together in time to swallow her scream. Her orgasm pushed him into his own. Bright light exploded behind his eyes. For three whole breaths he couldn't think, see or hear. Then it wound down enough that he managed to break their kiss and tuck his face into her shoulder.

"Fuck. Fuck, Juvia." His hips kept moving, his head kept spinning, still drunk, still high on euphoria. "Fuck, I love you."

Her moans petered out.

"Like this," Sting added, sensing the tension in her muscles. "Love you like this."

But the damage was done. "What?"

"I said, I love you like this," he reiterated.

Juvia was quiet. Then, "No, you didn't."

"It's what I meant," Sting defended himself.

 _Of course._ It didn't ring true. She turned her face away from his and looked out of the window, thinking of Gray and love and Magnolia. "Excuse me."

"That's what I get? 'Excuse me?'" Sting asked in disbelief. He'd never had a girl be so absolutely dismissive with him. Usually _he_ was the one taking off.

"What would you rather I say?" Juvia asked, too uncomfortable trapped beneath the dragon slayer. Her leg was still wrenched up, Sting was still buried to the base inside her, his mouth was still only inches from hers. _'I love you_.' His words penetrated her like water through porous concrete and lingered for as long after, too. No one ever said anything about love.

Sting fell back on sarcasm. "I'd rather you keep praising me like you were. _'Sting, I can't get enough, don't ever stop. Your cock is the best thing I've ever felt, you're so amazing_. _No one's ever fucked me like this before._ ' You know, the usual."

Juvia's neck got hot. "I didn't say that stuff."

He grinned toothily and nodded. "Definitely. Want me to prove it to you?" He moved his hips again, the motion making his softening cock harder once more. "We can go again."

Juvia wavered. _'I love you_.' The tips of her ears burned, her heart beat fast. "I think I just want to go back to my room and get some sleep. I'm going back to Magnolia tomorrow."

Sting looked crestfallen. It was only a blip of emotion, though, gone an instant later. His cool calm exterior was back in place. "Sure." He came out of her and let her rise while he flopped back on his bed. To keep up the illusion that everything was still normal, he slapped her ass when she stood. She yipped like she was supposed to and rubbed the sensitive area. Sting watched her dress, his handprint marring her asscheek, and entertained asking her to stay. He was silent, knowing if he said such a thing that she'd only flee faster.

* * *

Though she tried, Juvia didn't sleep that night. She just kept replaying that moment in her head, sweaty, impassioned, effortless. ' _I love you.' He didn't mean it._ Of course not. And yet, she thought maybe he did.

She'd given up on rest long before the sun rose, so she was at the train station precisely when the first train to Magnolia rolled through. The first one onboard, she sat at the back, drank the coffee she'd purchased at a stand along the way, and thought about who she _thought_ she should be thinking about. Gray. Her mind kept wandering back, though. _'I love you.'_

Two tortured hours later, she stepped out of the cart and was surrounded by the first gusts of fall air; the leaves hadn't started changing yet, but they would be soon. She looked in the direction of Gray's home and almost started walking that way, but then she had a moment of doubt and trudged instead to Fairy Hills where she ran into Erza.

"Hi Juvia," the redhead greeted. "How did your job with Gray go?"

Juvia looked at her miserably. "Terribly," she admitted.

"Oh..." Erza tried to think of something uplifting to say but by the time she figured it out Juvia was already halfway down the hall and the moment had passed. She frowned and considered going to beat the hell out of the ice mage—was he forever going to give her the runaround? But then thought better of it; she was no expert in the matters of the heart and it was certainly none of her business.

* * *

Juvia showered and changed, feeling a little less hollow for it when she was through, though no less miserable.

 _You're the problem,_ she thought and was mildly horrified by how true that was. Maybe she should have given up on Gray a long time ago, back when he had run off and left her for months in that tiny house they shared instead of mourning and longing and hoping in the day and burying the pain at night with someone else.

To stave off her mounting misery, Juvia decided to go to the guild. Maybe Gray would be there. Maybe she'd look at him and everything would seem absolutely crystal clear.

Decided, she put on a long blue halter dress and a pair of tall black boots and left her hair loose around her shoulders, the ends still damp. She checked herself over once in the mirror before she left for Fairy Tail.

* * *

All of the way there, Juvia chewed on her nail, utterly torn between wanting to see Gray and wanting to hide away forever. ' _Stay away from me.'_ She nearly turned back she was so nervous, but knew that sooner or later she was going to have to face him, right?

All the same, when the time came she had to blank her mind to find the courage to open up the guild doors. The place was unusually quiet. Lucy rested her head against the bar, a towering plate of pancakes half finished before her. Elfman sat several tables away, his head bent into Evergreen's. They straightened when Juvia entered, both blushing furiously. She glowered at the pair and wondered if that could have been her and Gray if she didn't mess up so badly. _He doesn't want you_ , chimed a mean, self-depreciating voice. She felt like the wind had been knocked from her lungs. She continued her scan. There was no Gray.

"Hey, Juvia," Lucy said, picking her head up from the bar. "You want some pancakes? I can't finish them all. Or are you and Gray going to have breakfast together?"

Her chin wobbled. "No." Not likely.

"Hey," the blonde said, seeing her watery expression, "What's the matter?"

Juvia waved her off. "It's nothing."

"That's a load of crap," Lucy said, grabbing her hand before she could wander away "Come on, out with it." She patted the seat beside her. Juvia looked behind the bar where Mirajane leaned over the countertop talking to Laxus. She seemed rather enthralled with whatever the dragon slayer was saying, not paying attention to them at all.

She bit her cheek. "I don't know if I want to tell you."

"You can trust me," Lucy said sincerely, "but if you don't feel comfortable..."

What if she took advantage of the situation and went after Gray? It was an irrational thought, one that belonged to the Juvia that hadn't betrayed him, not one she the traitor had any right to think. That shamed her into vocalism. "I—I really messed things up."

Lucy was just about to brush her off as insecure but noticed the absence of 'sama' and knew it was a little more serious than that. "What do you mean?" A number of circumstances were running through her head and none of them sounded like something Juvia would do.

"I..." This was difficult to say. "Do you promise to keep this between us?" She and Sting had gone undetected for a long time; it felt strange to be on the cusp of revealing her darkest, most shame-filled secret.

"Of course," Lucy said.

"I've been seeing someone else; Gray found out and now everything is a mess." She said the words quickly, afraid she wouldn't be able to get them out if she didn't.

Lucy blinked at her for a breath, trying to decide if the water mage was joking and she should laugh, or if she was serious. When Juvia's lip quivered again she knew that she meant what she said. " _What_?"

Mira turned and looked over her shoulder.

"Shhh!" Juvia clamped her hand over Lucy's mouth, purposefully avoiding Mira's probing stare.

"Sorry," Lucy said in a quieter voice when Juvia removed her hand. "Just… Juvia… _why_? You love Gray."

She shrugged weakly. "I guess I was lonely."

Lucy rubbed her temples slowly. " _Who_ were you seeing _?"_

"Sting," was out of her mouth before she could think better of it.

" _Eucliff_?" Lucy squawked.

Mira stood up straight. "What are you ladies talking about over there?"

Juvia scowled at the celestial mage, wishing she'd kept her mouth closed. " _Nothing_."

"Nothing!" Lucy mimicked and waved her hands unconvincingly.

Mira looked as though she were about to protest but then Laxus piped up again and, after a suspicious look, she went back to their conversation.

"I told you to be quiet!" Juvia hissed furiously.

" _Sorry_ ," Lucy said. "It's just… _really_?"

"Does it _look_ like I'm lying?" Juvia asked.

"Right." Lucy steepled her fingers and forced her mind calm. "So… he was mad when he found out?"

Juvia sat and propped her chin in her hand. "That's one word for it."

"Well, what happened?"

She shrugged. "Gray said he didn't care at first, but then he kissed me twice and—"

" _What?!"_

Juvia puffed out her cheeks. "Honestly, if you're going to keep interrupting—"

" _Sorry_ ," she said again. "Really?"

Juvia fixed her with a scathing scowl.

"Okay, okay, I'll stop." Lucy mimed zipping her lips. "Continue."

Juvia looked around the guild hall for anyone that might be listening in. Jet and Droy walked in, saw that Levy wasn't there, and left, Elfman and Ever were back to canoodling and pretending that they weren't, Mira was laughing at something Laxus was saying. No one paid them any mind. She shimmied closer so she could whisper in Lucy's ear and told her the whole sordid tale.

"He told me to stay away from him and took off last night," she finished blandly, "And I haven't seen him since."

"Wow," Lucy said.

"Something a little more helpful then 'wow' would be nice," Juvia replied shortly, her frustration after recounting the whole thing making her sharp.

"Alright. Okay." Lucy huffed out a sigh. "I don't know what to tell you."

Juvia groaned and dropped her face into her hands.

"Sorry," Lucy replied. "It's not like I have boys lining up to talk to me. Boyfriendless, remember?" she said with a smile.

"Maybe you should go talk to him," Mira interjected from the other end of the bar.

Juvia sputtered.

"Sorry!" the takeover mage said. "Couldn't help but overhear." Laxus had disappeared and now it was only the three of them around the wooden beer-stained counter. Juvia examined her closely and realized that Mira was a dirty liar; she had long, cat-like ears in place of her own. She couldn't make them transform back before the water mage saw.

"Liar." Juvia scowled at Lucy.

"Hey," Lucy protested. "I didn't do anything, be mad at Mira, not me."

Mira scurried over. "Never mind that. Sting Eucliffe, you said?" Her eyes were bright.

Juvia laid her cheek against the bar in defeat. "Yes."

"I won't say anything," Mira promised. "But I do think you should go talk to Gray. I know you guys haven't really been official or anything, but I've known him a long time and I know he cares about you."

"Even if I did, it wouldn't matter. He said he didn't want to be together because he wants to go after END by himself," Juvia revealed, figuring it was too late now for secrets. "He says he's afraid of me getting in the way."

Mira was silent for a long time. "That's a dumb thing for him to say," she said finally. "We're all stronger when we're together. I think if you go talk to him he'll come around."

"What if he doesn't? What if he's too mad?" She wanted so badly for everything to be normal again. ' _I love you.'_ Somehow she thought 'normal' was never going to come back around.

Mira frowned. "That might be a possibility," she agreed. "But I know you two care about each other, and even if a romantic relationship is off the table, I know you wouldn't want to just let things get awkward. You're still friends, aren't you?"

Were they?

"The answers yes, Juvia," Lucy supplied as if she could see right through her. "I agree with Mira; you should go see him. You might be able to salvage something if you nip it in the bud now, but if you leave it… things will only get worse."

Juvia straightened and rolled her shoulders back. "Okay."

"You're going to do it?" Lucy asked with a raise of her brow.

Juvia nodded and stood.

"Right now?" Mira asked, a hint of admiration in her eye.

"If I don't do it now, I'll lose my nerve." Already after only one step her legs quivered.

"Good luck," Lucy called. "I'm sure everything will work out."

Juvia wasn't quite so confident, but she'd try anyway.

* * *

An insistent knocking had Gray groggily opening his eyes.

His head pounded, a wicked hangover coming on, but for the moment he was somewhere in between, still mostly drunk and blissfully foggy. At some point last night, he had kicked Samantha out and passed out right where he lay on the floor, totally unconscious. Since then he'd only moved marginally. He still lay flat on the ground staring up at the ceiling but now his hands were locked behind his head. Every bone ached.

He swallowed unsuccessfully, his mouth was so dry.

The knocking continued. Someone started calling his name but he couldn't hear them through the door beyond a garbled voice. Gray closed his eyes and prayed that whoever it was would just go away.

Instead of getting his wish the door popped open.

"Hello?"

He stiffened and cracked an eyelid, squinting against the morning light trickling through the doorway. Was it really so bright out?

"Gray?"

She was silhouetted but he didn't need to see her, her face was branded in his mind.

"Gray? Are you home?"

Gray sat up on his elbows and squinted through the gloom and dust motes. "What are you doing here, Juvia?" His voice was hoarse.

She came into his house and fumbled with the light. Brightness filled his home, making him hiss. "Turn it off, what's the matter with you?"

"Oh!" she rushed to do as he said but paused when her eyes landed on him. He was more than half naked and sprawled on the floor, blackness stretching from his right arm all the way up over his chest and even kissing his chin. "Gray… what happened to you?"

"The lights, Juvia!" he snarled and she was shocked into obeying.

Thrown into darkness once more, her heart pounded. She stepped carefully into the room, hands stretched out before her, feeling for objects in her way when she couldn't see.

"Careful," Gray said but it was too late. Her foot caught his and she toppled over head first. Her elbow found his nose in the chaos and he cursed, seeing stars. Juvia landed heavily, half on top and half beside him.

"Ow!" she complained.

"I told you to watch where you were going," he scolded, voice nasally as he clutched his nose. It didn't bleed but it was tender. "Stop doing that, would you?" He wasn't going to have much of a face left if she kept unintentionally abusing him.

"If you let me turn on the light this wouldn't have happened," she replied stubbornly, picking herself off the ground and rocking back into a more favorable position.

"Well, don't just barge in here," he said defensively. "It's my house. I was doing just _fine_ without the damn lights."

"What are you doing on the ground?" she asked pointedly.

"Mind your own business."

His breath hit her, thick as it was with alcohol. "Were you drinking?"

"Just leave it, Juvia, and leave here while you're at it," he replied shortly.

That was all the confirmation she needed. "You slept on the floor all night?"

"Did I say that?" he challenged.

"Are you going to deny it?"

Gray sat the rest of the way up and clumsily gathered his feet under him. He held his shorts around his waist when they tried to slip below his hips. Juvia blushed, her eyes finally adjusting to the dark, but didn't look away.

"Why is your mark like that?"

Gray didn't answer her, just stumbled into the washroom and slammed the door. In the confines of the small room he dunked his head under freezing cold water, soaking his hair and neck, trying to chase away some of the drunkenness. It didn't work as well as he thought it might. Still parched, he twisted his face beneath the water stream and gulped as much of the cold liquid as he could. _Maybe she'll be gone when I get back out_ , he thought hopefully; she was a reminder he didn't need at the moment, a temptation that was cloying and heady and obnoxiously persistent. He couldn't believe that here she was, back again. _Just to fuck with you, that's all._

He scrubbed a towel through his hair and tied his shorts tighter on his hips. He still felt drunk as fuck, but a little more put together. When he exited the washroom Juvia was sitting on his bed looking like every dark fantasy he ever had. She had left the light off, but he didn't need it to see by; the shadows clung to and accentuated her well enough, gently caressing the dips and curves of her body. He beat back a heinously vulgar daydream and said, "What are you still doing here?"

Juvia flushed brightly even in the gloom. "I wanted to talk to you. Tell me, what's going on with that mark?"

"I already said it's nothing," he said exasperatedly.

"You're lying." She stood and stepped toward him. "Are you losing control of it again?"

He clenched his jaw; Juvia was too near. He crossed his arms definitively over his chest. "I'm handling it," he dodged.

"It doesn't look like it." She touched the area unthinkingly, the coldness bleeding through her fingers and numbing her skin all the way up to her forearm.

Her touch sent chills skittering over his body. Gray caught her wrist and held her still. "Don't."

"Sorry." She tried to pull away but he held her firmly.

"Why did you come back? I thought you were going to stay in Port Dover for a few days?" He wished he hadn't asked as soon as the words were out.

Juvia looked away. _'I love you.'_ "I just wanted to come home."

Gray sucked on a tooth and ignored the way his stomach flopped. "You left Sting there?"

"Yeah."

 _She left him._ "You can't keep doing this to me, Juvia," he said after a moment.

She blinked at him in the darkness.

"Every time I leave you behind you just show up again."

"I didn't come here to beg you back," she said carefully, trying to ignore the roaring in her ears. "I just wanted to say that I still wanted to be friends. I don't want things to get weird between us."

And that made it worse. He squeezed her wrist almost to the point of pain and searched her eyes. "You shouldn't have come here at all. You should have stayed away."

She didn't know if she ever could turn her back on him completely. She didn't reply.

Gray slid his hand up over her arm.

Juvia caught her breath when his fingers landed under her chin. "If you don't want this then you should stop," she said dazedly.

"I never said I didn't want this, Juvia, it's the only thing I think about," he replied, too honest for his own good.

She kept incredibly still, determined not to move an inch. "You said we couldn't be together. You told me never to come near you again." As if reminding him would make him step away.

He gently tugged on the dangling dolphin earring hanging in her ear, lost in thought. "END…"

"I'm strong enough to be by your side," she told him when he trailed off. Gray's fingers abandoned her ear and started playing through her hair. His face hadn't changed; it was as though he hadn't heard her.

"I wanted to hurt you," he said, thinking of Samantha. "I wanted to forget about you." His slayer mark pulsed with coldness.

Juvia shivered and licked her lips. She thought to come closer to him to stave off that chill but then she realized it was coming from his skin. She looked into his eyes; they gleamed in the darkness, a little malicious, a lot lost. "And you can't."

"I can and that's what scares me." He dropped his eyes to her mouth and found he wasn't able to look away. "This is all wrong."

"Gray—"

"You should leave," he said again.

Juvia couldn't, especially when Gray's hand tracked down her side, sliding over her collarbone, her breast, coming to rest on her hip. "I don't want to."

His skin was cold when he kissed her. At first she didn't respond, too numb to do much. He needed to shave; his skin prickled hers when he moved his mouth. He tasted like old alcohol and metal and felt like winter. She loved it. And hated herself for it. Sting tried to work his way into her thoughts ( _I love you)_ but then Gray pressed his hand into her back and her mind blanked.

She didn't realize they were moving until her knees hit his mattress. He broke away long enough to push her back and climb on top of her.

 _Stop this_ , Gray thought wildly, but he hardly felt rational. His mark burned, his mind reeled, his body throbbed. _Juvia_. The living blackness stretched a bit further, reaching down across his ribs and up into his fingers; it wanted to break free.

He grabbed her thighs and pushed against her. The skirt of her dress came up; she was wearing peach pink panties that looked a bit damp already. Juvia let out a panting gasp and arched her back. Gray kissed the skin on her neck, desire warring with reasonableness. She always made him crazy and his rationality was all but eaten up; there were so many things working against him, residual drunkenness, lust, insatiable and feral magic that he still didn't understand.

Juvia grasped at his sheets, lost in euphoria as Gray kissed the hollow of her throat and pushed hard against her. ' _I love you.' 'I love you.'_ There was only one man whose love she thought she'd ever want, and here he was.

He tugged on the neckline of her dress, pulling it down roughly. Some of the internal threads snapped. It was worth weathering Juvia's mild gasp of lust-tinged horror when her breasts spilled out, hiked high by the strained fabric. He grabbed her with hands that shook, pushing her breasts together. He kissed both, first one then the other, and licked until she moaned breathily. Then he closed his mouth around one peak and sucked. Nails biting into his bare shoulders brought him both pain and pleasure. His devil slayer's mark ached. Torn between the sensations, he bit Juvia hard while he looked up the line of her body. Red roses bloomed on her cheeks, her lips, her neck. She was beautiful and fragile. It would be so easy to break her. To end this. Gray told himself to be cruel. It was the best way he knew to be kind. It would be several minutes yet before he discovered how.

Instead of telling her to go he took his mouth away from her body and demanded, "Tell me you want this." That way not all of the onus would be on him.

" _Yes,_ " she replied immediately with a great amount of conviction. Enough conviction that Gray ignored his pounding head, his slightly nauseous stomach, and fought with his shorts. They were easy to get low, whether that was a good thing or not, he hadn't decided yet. His moral dilemma was pushed to the wayside as Juvia arched her hips, the leather of the boots she still wore warm on his skin, and bowed into him. She was wet, soaked through her panties.

"Wait."

"No," she panted.

 _No._ He was nearly lacking enough blood in his head that he almost thought it was a good idea to slide into her unprotected. Reason won over libido. He pulled back from her and rooted through his nightstand for a condom. It took him four tries to get it open, each failed attempt bringing him closer to saying _'fuck it.'_ Thankfully the fifth time was the charm, it came open and he slid it on. Juvia's hands were right there as soon as he was through, massaging his hard length, tickling the swell of the head while she crooned reverently. Juvia loved everything about him. It was a power Gray knew he could abuse. It was hard not to.

He pushed her hands aside and grabbed the fabric of her panties with clumsy, stupid fingers. They stretched, uncovering her. Samantha was gone from his head, a bump on a long, rotten road full of bumps. Now there was only Juvia. Juvia, with her puffing breaths, her beside herself sighs, her sharp nails. _All of the things Sting enjoyed before you._

Gray stopped thinking, otherwise rage would take over. He kissed her, tongue moving wetly over hers, and made sure their lips were together when he slid inside her body, that way he _knew_ how much she enjoyed it, and pretended she didn't make all of the same noises for someone else.

* * *

It didn't escape Juvia that Gray didn't try to wrap his arm around her. He didn't kiss her tenderly or say any gentle words. He stared at the ceiling, chest rising and falling rapidly while he sweated, face pale.

"I'll tell Sting when he gets back to Sabretooth," Juvia said finally, breaking the melody of their pants.

Gray's breath came to a standstill. "Tell him what?"

"That we can't see each other anymore," Juvia explained. "That you and I—"

"We're not." His throat burned.

Juvia propped herself up on her elbow. Her sapphire hair cascaded over her shoulder like liquid jewels. She searched his eyes with her dark ones. "What?"

He swallowed; it didn't help alleviate the swelling he felt in his throat. _That's guilt._ And there was plenty of it. "It was just a thing."

"A thing."

"Yeah."

"You're going to give me that line of bullshit?"

"People have things," Gray returned.

"Not you and me."

"You're the one with someone else's bite mark on your ass."

Juvia's cheeks reddened; she'd deserved that one. "Do you say this stuff just to hurt me?"

"What do you think?"

She threw his words back at him. "That you're so fucked up, you don't even know _what_ you want, Gray."

He flinched, hurt flashing behind his eyes. Juvia softened, always a fool for him.

"I'm sorry."

"Don't be."

She tried to mend the damage by tracking her finger up his blackened arm. The skin there was so cold it burned. She kept going. "Tell me you love me."

He turned his head and looked at her for the first time since he'd entered her. "Juvia… I—"

She listened carefully.

"If I did, it would be a lie."

Juvia went as rigid as a stick. She searched his eyes for cracks in his facade and saw none. Wordlessly she stood, fixed her dress up around her chest and around her hips. Then she made for the door. She slammed it so hard, Gray's whole cottage shook. The devil slayer pressed his palms into his eyes hard enough he saw white. It still wasn't enough to ward off the dampness completely.


	11. Chapter 11

Hours had passed since Juvia left. In her wake, Gray lay against his mattress and stared at the ceiling listlessly, wondering just what the hell was wrong with her and what was especially wrong with him. Down low, his body pulsed pleasingly even while he felt headsick. The whole thing felt toxic in the best and worst way.

Only when his eyes were completely dry did he finally rise. Being vertical wasn't the greatest; it made his head spin and caused his increasing nausea to reach its peak. His mouth watered, the only warning he had that last night's regrets weren't done with him. He just made it into the washroom in time to fall to his knees in front of the toilet and throw up all of Samantha's cinnamon whisky. It tasted even worse coming up. He retched until he couldn't but still didn't feel right. Sweaty and dizzy, he flushed the mess away and encouraged himself into an ice cold shower. It was then, standing under the freezing spray, that he realized his father's mark had stretched further and no matter what he did, it wouldn't shrink. He found a tile on the wall to stare at instead of his body and did everything in his power to control the disquieted fear he felt.

He didn't bother paying attention to the time that passed, not by any traditional sense, anyway, waiting until his skin was prune-like to get out and get dressed. By then he still felt like shit, but not quite like he was going to be sick anymore. He dressed in a long sleeved T-shirt and pants, mostly covering the black stain on his skin, then decided that it was time to brave the outside world in order to find some answers. There was only one person he knew that could give him what he wanted, though he didn't relish the interaction.

He moved through the streets in relative peace towards Fairy Tail's medical advisor's home, passing by closing shops, restaurants, the quiet river. Then he was leaving Magnolia behind, coming into the darkening forest. Everything was awash in red, the trees, the ground, the copper needles, set aflame by the sinking sun.

He took his time meandering through the forest, sometimes even diverging from the well-worn footpath, but Porlyusica's cottage still came up faster than Gray expected. Steeling himself for an unpleasant interaction, he knocked briskly on her door. The sound cracked into his head and made the space between his ears ache. Hangovers. _Never drinking again¸_ he decided, though he didn't promise himself.

Porlyusica answered immediately, like she was waiting by the door. She didn't even look particularly surprised to see him. She didn't give Gray a word of greeting, just assessed his physical appearance, huffed indignantly in that way she had and opened the door wide.

Gray stepped into the musty room. It was overstuffed with herbs and potions and books. There was clutter on every surface, the table, the loveseat that sat in front of the fireplace, the windowsills.

Porlyusica closed the door, locking him into the little cottage overrun with baubles and potions and pointed to the one open chair at the kitchen table. "Sit, and tell me what you did."

Gray dropped himself into the chair. "I didn't _do_ anything."

She gave him a reproachful look.

He corrected, "I may have overused the power when I froze a lindworm nest."

"That's what you think? Overexertion caused this?"

Gray scrubbed his face. "I don't know. If I knew I wouldn't be here, would I?"

It came out so sharp, Gray was sure Porlyusica was going to punish him in some way. She kept her hands to herself and shook her head. "Stand, stupid boy, and let me see."

Gray grudgingly did as she asked, yanking up his T-shirt to show her the mark. She prodded him here and there, shaking out her hand when the tips of her fingers went numb, He knew it was bad not because she said so, but because her breathing changed, shortened. "And?" he asked, fearing the worst. "What's wrong with it?"

"There's something wrong with you, not your mark," Porlyusica replied with a particularly sour look on her face.

Gray tugged his shirt back in place without asking if it were okay. " _I'm_ fine," he objected. "It was only weird after I froze those lindworms—"

" _I'm_ telling you, it's a problem in here." She prodded his chest with a sharp nail.

"Ow," he complained and rubbed the spot.

She didn't apologize.

Feeling grumpy, Gray asked, "So what are you going to do?"

"Nothing."

He felt his neck heat. "What do you mean, _nothing_?"

"You have a personal problem, Gray. The magic is taking advantage of the unrest in your mind," she said sagely.

"I told you, I'm _fine_. I don't have a personal problem." It felt like Porlyusica's walls were closing in on him. _'Tell me you love me.'_ If he did have a problem, it was born of Juvia. _Yeah, because Juvia cultivated this shit pile, right?_ He was in up to his elbows in it. _Why the_ fuck _did you sleep with her?_ He had no answer.

Porlyusica dragged him back into reality. "As I recall, the last time this happened you were under emotional duress—"

Gray knew what she was going to say and did his best to sidetrack her. "I had just _gotten_ the stupid thing, I wasn't under duress, I just couldn't figure out how to control it—"

"Silver's death had nothing to do with it?" She raised a brow challengingly.

Gray felt his father's demise all over again. His throat tightened. Not that he needed to speak, Porlyusica saw right through him. "Whatever is bothering you, work through it, otherwise the magic is going to use you up and you'll be nothing but a husk of a man."

Gray swallowed and felt his throat loosen enough that he could choke out, "Can't you just give me something for it? Last time we—"

"This isn't _like_ last time," she said, "I've taught you every trick I know to wrangle in that power. If it's not working, _you_ need to work through your issues. Now, if you don't mind, get out."

"But—"

"Goodbye." She grabbed his elbow and hauled him up, surprisingly strong for a woman of her age and her size. She pushed him bodily from her home. The door slammed loudly at his back, making him wince. Turning, he glowered at it and debated upon trying to re-enter but then he heard the lock engage and knew she meant business. He sighed and stuffed his hands into his pockets and trudged through the detritus-filled forest.

* * *

The river Juvia sat beside trickled quietly, its surface rippling as the water slipped over the rocks beneath. She was supposed to find peace in this secret place, but all that was available to her was turmoil.

 _'It would be a lie.'_

She shoved her fingers through her hair and pulled at the locks. ' _A lie.'_

 _I wished I asked him to tell it._

She couldn't tell if she meant that or not.

 _I wish…_

 _What?_

That she hadn't hooked up with Sting? That she hadn't let Gray use her? That she had have stepped back and just done _anything_ else?

 _And if you had? Then what?_ Then she wouldn't have known what it was like to kiss Gray. She wouldn't have known what it was like to be with Sting. At the thought of her dragon slayer her heart hurt. Her thoughts took her back to that night a year before.

 _High on their victory at the Grand Magical Games, the winners sat at the Rose's Collar in Crocus. Gray was drunk, drunk enough that he didn't pull away from Juvia when she sat down so close that their shoulders rubbed together._

 _She'd flirted with him shamelessly, encouraged when he didn't tell her to leave. Every few minutes she'd nudge a little closer until she was practically in his lap. His arm came around her waist, otherwise he'd have nowhere to put it. He'd looked at her and it felt like the whole bar disappeared. It was then that she leaned in. And found herself suddenly alone. His stool rocked so hard it almost fell over in his haste to rise. There was a panicked expression on his face._

 _"Gray—" Juvia started._

 _He was gone, disappearing completely into the roaring crowd._

 _Her eyes pricked. She held in a sob, thinking,_ That's it, that's the last time I cry for Gray Fullbuster, _but even as she thought it she knew she was wrong, there was still plenty more where that came from._

 _"Another beer," she said to the bartender and he busied himself with filling her cup._

 _A ruckus had her turning her head. Sabretooth, who had been sitting at one of the tables in the back, started laughing loudly. She twisted the rest of her body to see what all the fuss was about and saw Orga, their god slayer, slam down an empty cup of beer and holler loudly. Sting Eucliffe glowered at him, finishing his own cup a beat too slow._

 _"Loser gets the next round," the massive man said._

 _Sting snorted but rose. He was a little uneven on his feet when he approached the bar, eyes glossy, hair slightly askew. He leaned beside Juvia, unmindful of her personal space, and called to the bartender in a loud, obnoxious voice. "HEY! We need another round back there!"_

 _The bartender looked at the man exasperatedly and Juvia knew that Sabretooth had been a bit of a problem that night. "Give me a sec."_

 _"It's alright, man, just give me that one," Sting said, nodding to the beer in his hand._

 _"That's mine," Juvia piped up, annoyed._

 _Sting slid his blue gaze over to her and didn't bother turning his head when he said, "I don't see your name on it."_

 _"Well, it_ is _," she insisted._

 _She watched him suck on a tooth and thought maybe he'd argue some more but then, to her surprise, he let it go._

 _They waited in silence for a beat and then Sting asked, "Hey, you're from Fairy Tail, right?"_

 _"Yes," she replied guardedly._

 _"What's your name?"_

 _She almost didn't tell him, but then he turned and faced her, a quirked smile on his lips, and, against her better judgement, she relented. "Juvia."_

 _"Yeah, you're the water mage, right?"_

 _She nodded._

 _"You want to come back and have a few drinks with us?" He nudged her forearm with his elbow._

 _The bartender came back with her beer. "I don't think so," she replied automatically and took a sip of the foamy liquid._

 _"Heh, you waiting for that ice mage to come back?" He raised a knowing brow and Juvia flushed. "It looked like he was leaving for the night."_

 _"Mind your own business," she replied._

 _"What do you want?" the bartender interrupted._

 _"Just a beer," Sting replied absently; all of his attention was focused on Juvia now, a wicked gleam in his eye._

 _"I thought you were buying for your table?" she felt obligated to remind him._

 _"Yeah," he leaned closer. "They're alright on their own; they look plenty drunk to me, don't you think?"_

 _She glanced over at them and saw Rogue throw off his dark cloak and stand on his chair; from there he leapt on top of their table, knocking glass jars half-filled with beer to the ground. Sabretooth chortled and clapped around him._

 _"Hey!" the bartender called, setting Sting's beer down on the counter. "You can't be up there! Get down!"_

 _Sting snickered. "Rogue's a mess."_

 _Juvia couldn't stop the smile from creeping on her lips when the usually reserved dragon slayer started dancing uncoordinatedly to Rufus' uneven singing. "That's going to hurt in the morning."_

 _Sting shrugged. "That comes later. Midnight is for regrets."_

 _"For regrets?" she raised a brow and then admonished herself for enjoying his conversation._

 _"Yeah." Sting downed his beer. "Drink up."_

 _"Why?"_

 _"Because we're going to have some fun." He winked at her and Juvia found herself wanting to do as he suggested._

 _"Go on, don't be shy."_

 _She took a deep gulp._

 _"You're alright, Fairy," he said and threw some money down on the bar._

 _Juvia eyed the large stack. "Isn't that a bit much?"_

 _Sting looked over his shoulder to where the bartender stood unsteadily on the chair and tried to wrestle Rogue down from the tabletop. The dragon slayer shrugged him off, shirt coming over his head in the bartender's grasp._

 _"OOOOOHHH! TAKE IT OFF!" a girl yelled from the other side of the bar. Encouraged, Rogue fumbled with his belt._

 _"Come on, before we see something we wished we hadn't," Sting said. He reached over the edge of the bar and grabbed a bottle of whisky from the shelf._

 _"You can't take that," Juvia protested._

 _"Hey, I bought it," Sting said, nodding to the cash._

 _She puckered her lips. "I'm pretty sure it doesn't work like that—you're not supposed to take_ bottles _."_

 _"Hey, you want to have fun or sit in here and mope because ice boy dumped you?"_

 _"He didn't dump me," she objected, and wished she sounded surer of herself._

 _Sting shrugged. "Where is he, then?"_

 _Juvia was silent._

 _"I'll tell you what, Juvia, I'll be out back and if you decide you want to have a good time tonight instead of pouting, you can come out and find me. And if not, heh, no skin off my nose."_

 _She watched him go, heart pounding, and warred with herself._ You can sit here and be miserable about Gray _, she thought,_ or you can try to salvage a bit of your night. _She felt like a traitor when she stood. From the back of the room, Orga laughed raucously and then Rogue was flying through the air, thrown by the bartender._

 _"You get out!" the man said. "And I don't want to see you back here!"_

 _Rogue righted himself with some effort and planted his feet firmly, a feral grin on his mouth. Juvia recognized a fight when it was about to break out. She dropped her empty beer glass on the countertop and stood._

* * *

 _She meant to leave and go back to her hotel, maybe find Gray and try to smooth things over with him, but she saw Sting's halo of blonde hair glinting in the moonlight and paused. He leaned against the wall in the alley between the bar and the restaurant at its side, one arm crossed over his chest, the other holding the bottle he had taken._

 _"Hey, Fairy girl, you came," he said with a smirk._

 _Juvia's stomach twisted. She shook her head but her feet were moving against her will. Coming closer._

 _"Finally decided you wanted to have a good time, huh?"_

 _"I was just going," she hedged, "Gray-sama—"_

 _Sting stood straight. "Left you sitting in a bar by yourself for any degenerate to move in."_

 _"Like you?" she couldn't help but say._

 _Instead of being furious like she thought—hoped—Sting laughed. "Just like me," he agreed. He took a burning gulp of the fiery liquid and winced, then offered the bottle to Juvia. She looked at the drink uncertainly. Was it cheating if she shared a bottle with another man? It would almost be like kissing…_

 _She flushed. "I'm going to go—"_

 _"Awe, come on," Sting said. "I just left those guys in there—I'm about to get hit with a huge bill when they trash that place—you know they're going to—so don't make it for nothing."_

 _"But Gray-sama—"_

 _"You're pretty loyal to a guy that just left you in there by yourself."_

 _"He was just…"_

 _"Look, it's not like I'm trying to marry you or anything, we're just two people enjoying a drink together."_

 _She felt a feverish blush creep over her neck and up into her ears. She crossed her arms over her chest awkwardly. "I don't know…"_

 _"You just going to let him walk on you like that? You should have a good time, show him that even if he ditches you, life can go on without him. Maybe he'll wake up when he realizes you're not right where he left you."_

 _Juvia's hands tingled and she realized with a start that she was on the cusp of agreeing._ You're a bad girl, _she thought._ A traitor _. But Gray wasn't there, and it wasn't like she was doing anything behind his back—she was just going to have a bit of fun like Sting said, for just a little while._

 _Sting took another sip of the whisky and waggled it in front of her face. "I thought you were out here because you wanted to party, not sulk about some guy?"_

 _Juvia wrinkled up her nose and snatched the bottle from his hands. Sting laughed when she took a deep gulp and almost spat it back up. It burned all the way down and warmed her extremities immediately._

 _"Atta girl," he said. "Let's go see what trouble we can get into."_

* * *

 _He was light were Gray was dark, sharp and cutting and unapologetic about it. The best part was he was willing to give her some of his time without her having to beg. His eyes clung to her unashamedly and he didn't try to make excuses to get closer to her. Maybe she was weak, but for a moment she was free. Only if it was fleeting, only if it was fake, she was able to step away from the suffocating frustration she felt with Gray and enjoy herself a bit._

 _They ended up by the river, Sting dragging her ever towards the water. Juvia laughed and shook her head. "Aren't you afraid of getting soaked?" Gray-sama hated being wet._

 _He pulled his shirt over his head and then started working at his pants._

 _Juvia blocked her eyes with her hands and, for what felt like the hundredth time that night, flushed hotly. "Sting, don't do that!"_

 _"Too late."_

 _She heard splashing and when she dared to pull her hand away from her face he was in the water. It was only deep enough to rest just above his hips; she could see he had taken off everything._

 _"Come on," he coaxed. "I thought water was your thing."_

 _Juvia swallowed tightly, wanting desperately to both leave and join him in there._

 _"Come on, Juvia, get your ass in here," Sting demanded. "Don't make me swim by myself."_

 _She clutched the hem of her shirt nervously. "Don't look," she told him and then clamped her lips together, hardly believing she was entertaining this._

 _"Come on, don't be shy."_

 _That wasn't the promise she was looking for, but she was feeling just this side of drunk enough to not truly care. She pulled her shirt over her head and then shimmied out of her skirt. She wasn't brave enough to get totally naked, so she left her bra and panties just where they were. Then she hurried into the brisk water, feeling Sting's eyes on her all the way._

 _At first she was careful to keep a bit of distance between them, but he was persistent. Every time she blinked he had crept a little closer, until he was so near she could feel the heat from his body radiating through the water._

 _"You look good like that," the dragon slayer commented._

 _Her skin prickled. "Like?"_

 _He smirked. "Wet and naked."_

 _Juvia tried to pull away but he touched her arm lightly, thoroughly halting her movements. He came in closer._

 _"What do you think you're doing?" Juvia found the breath to ask._

 _"I was thinking about kissing you," he said smoothly._

 _Her ears roared; she was too slow in pulling back, Sting was sure, movements effortless, totally unafraid of rejection when he came forward and caught her mouth. He kissed her slowly at first, but when she didn't pull away he gripped her hips and kneaded his fingers in roughly. His enthusiasm was catching and before she knew it she had wrapped her arms around his neck and kissed him back._

 _He pulled at the fabric around her hips and a sliver of clarity punched through her desire._

 _"Stop."_

 _Sting pulled back and looked at her. "What's the matter?"_

 _"I can't do this—I'm betraying Gray-sama," she said weakly._

 _Sting came back to kiss her neck. "Are you together?" His lips skimmed over her skin lightly, sending wave after wave of goose bumps over her body._

 _"Well…" she hedged._

 _"Well?" he nipped her._

 _Juvia pressed her hands against his chest. It was difficult to think when he kept flicking his tongue over her damp skin._

 _"Yes or no, Juvia, it's a simple question."_

 _His hands moved upwards to the place just below her breasts. She squeezed his shoulders uncertainly._

 _"Yes," he cupped her breasts and ran his thumbs over her hardened nipples. "Or no?"_

 _"N-no," she breathed unevenly._

 _"I didn't think so." He pinched her between his thumb and forefinger._

 _"But we_ could _be," she said, not so willing to let it drop though his hands felt ridiculously good._

 _"So? We're just messing around, Juvia, having a bit of fun." He kissed her again, tongue exploring her mouth expertly. "We'll keep it secret, and come tomorrow we'll go our separate ways."_

Just a bit of fun _._

 _"It's just a night."_

* * *

Just a night turned into two, turned into a weekly adventure, and before she knew it, she was sneaking off to see Sting nearly every day. There was a bit of thrill, a release, and excitement, too, because she didn't have to try with him; she didn't worry if he loved her or not, not like she did with Gray. Things were easy, effortless, and rough. They certainly used each other for everything they were worth and neither one of them felt badly for it.

Things only got messy when feelings were involved.

* * *

Sting pulled away from a violet haired mage whose name he didn't know. He sweated and panted and felt perfectly hollow for it.

"That was fun," the girl said, adjusting her skirt around her legs. "So you'll consider my application for Sabretooth, right?"

He grunted noncommittally.

" _Right_?"

"Not likely," he replied honestly, tired of the game. He had lied to get her in here and was disappointed she wasn't as great of a distraction as he thought she would be.

"What do you mean, not likely?" she fumed.

"Just get out, get the door on your way," he replied and waved her off.

"You're an asshole," she spat.

"And you suck at blowjobs," he replied meanly.

"Fuck you."

"Hey man, truth is the truth." He just wanted to see her flinch; it made him feel better for his conduct, which perhaps didn't make sense to any rational mind, but he felt hardly rational.

She huffed and said the expected, "Go to hell." The door slammed so hard the walls rattled.

Sting flopped back on his bed and stared at the ceiling, feeling like he was already there and hating himself for it. That mage was the last of a long line of women that had frequented his bedroom in the last… ah… day. Had it only been a _day_ since he opened his fucking mouth and Juvia left? Since then he had traveled through several states of denial, the first lie he told himself going something like this, ' _I don't care if she leaves.'_ and then progressed to, _'I'm glad she's gone.'_ and hopped to, ' _Anyone can take her place._ ' Anything to prove himself wrong. Thus the girls entered the scene, and the final lie on top of the rotting, seeping lie cake went something like, ' _I don't love Juvia Lockser._ ' He would have believed it too if he didn't have to close his eyes and imagine Juvia wrapped around him to enjoy someone else's company when it had never been an issue before.

He sighed, stood and stumbled to the shower, knowing that while he seemed to be an accomplished liar he couldn't bullshit himself; things were never supposed to get this far, he wasn't ever supposed to actually _feel_ anything for her. He scrubbed his hands over his face and wondered what it would take—if anything would sway her mind away from that loser she was always chasing. He glowered depreciatively and again wished he wasn't so drunk the other night—he would have kicked Gray's ass. _You think that would have changed anything_? It might have made him feel better. _Juvia would have hated you._ Not that it should matter. He ground his teeth together and turned on the hot water. It was almost too warm to step under, and even when he did, it didn't wash away any of his annoyances.

Juvia was in his mind like a throbbing thorn.

 _Yank it out; go to her._ The irony wasn't lost on him. He had spent countless hours telling her how fruitless her pursuit of Gray Fullbuster was, and yet here he was, chasing after a woman in love with another man.

He almost groaned and went back to bed, forgot about the whole damn thing, but if he was going to mope about it, he might as well find out if she really felt nothing. _If you're going to fuck everything up, you might as well make sure it's done right._

* * *

 **A/N:** I just wanted to take a second. I've said it before, but I'll go ahead and say it again. I hope anyone reading this that has been brave enough to post their stories to Fan Fiction has never stopped writing due to someone's discouraging (hateful? Can I say that? Sure.) review. I suspect that some people don't like my writing (and by that I mean I know, because I'm told all the time) but for the most part, those opinions are delivered in such a way that I find myself not wanting to go female-hulk-on-her-period on them. There are always those few, however, that haven't yet learned tact, and probably never will. You'll never cure dumb.

My point is, shrug off the haters. Really, at the end of the day, their opinion matters so little it's of no consequence. Don't let others belittle you to make themselves feel big. Even when you receive that hate, don't respond to it. It really is more satisfying to be the bigger person.


	12. Chapter 12

Laying flat on her back for so long pinched a nerve that made Juvia's foot go numb. Beneath her head was a boulder entrapped in moss. It smelled like soil and green, if a colour _could_ smell. The clothes on her back were damp with the gathering dew. Despite her discomfort, she didn't move.

The clouds, charred red by the setting sun, rolled by one at a time, fast enough that Juvia found herself surprised at their speed. In the brief moments she had with the puffy white individuals, she tried to pick out shapes in their cauliflower heads, first to ease her mind, then to pass the time. Why was she procrastinating? She couldn't say. _To get away from Gray_. Yeah, maybe. To get away from asking herself if what he said was true. To get away from thinking at all. That would sure be nice, wouldn't it?

 _'It would be a lie.'_

She heard him approach long, long before she saw him, so she had plenty of time to blink the tears from her eyes, to flatten her mouth, to fuss covertly at the hem of her skirt before he came into view. He stopped, booted feet resting on either side of her head, close enough that she could feel the heat of his skin _through_ the leather.

"Of all the places you could be, you're out here by yourself. Crying again."

His hair was a golden halo set aflame, though Juvia knew he was no angel.

"He turned you down again?"

Sting's voice was like a knife through her skin. She quivered and hiccoughed, suddenly on the edge of tears again. She wrapped her arms around her middle, trying to keep all of the pieces where they belonged. "Go away, Sting."

He sat down on the wet ground instead. "What happened?"

She tipped her head back to look at him properly. His usually laughing eyes were utterly serious. Juvia's throat burned. First she thought she wasn't going to respond, then surprised herself by saying, "Gray made love to me."

Sting accepted her words like a blow to the stomach. He didn't falter, though. Just felt sick. "Yeah?"

She wiped her eyes. "This morning."

He tried on a glib attitude. "If that's so, then why the hell are you out here crying and not sweating in his bed?"

He was always so tactful. She sniffled and numbed herself enough to say, "He doesn't love me." The clouds that had been drifting by slowed and lingered, getting overburdened with rain. Always rain. The first drop fell, heavy enough that dirt was catapulted into the air.

Sting reached out and pushed her hair back from her forehead, gentler than he'd ever been before. "You wanna come back to Sabretooth? Get out of the rain before you catch a cold?"

"Juvia is the water," she said as firmly as she could. "It doesn't bother me."

"Fine." He hunkered down so he was sitting and not kneeling. His thigh pressed into her shoulder, warm. Juvia found herself enjoying the feel of his body against hers, the familiar smell of his soap and cologne.

"Everything is so messed up."

"I know," he replied.

Juvia's lip trembled. "You weren't supposed to fall in love with me."

Sting looked at her from the corner of his eye. Old habits died hard, he almost revoked his shitty confession and shot her down. He didn't. "And I guess you weren't supposed to like it so much."

"It was supposed to be Gray." She didn't know if she said the words to hurt him or not.

"What can you do?"

Cry more. Her eyes watered. The rain fell harder.

Sting brushed his wet hair back off his forehead, the rain was cold for mid-summer, and pressed his mouth to hers in the wettest, most miserable of kisses. She didn't push him back, so he kept up the pressure for several heartbeats, only breaking when Juvia hiccoughed again.

"Sting… I—"

"Don't love me?" he challenged. "Not like you love _Gray-sama_?"

Juvia winced. The way she loved Gray was the way an addict loved their fix. The way it made her feel, especially now, made her want to feel _anything_ else.

Sting's expression softened. "When you kiss me, you don't feel anything at all?"

"I feel lots of things," Juvia admitted. She had a hard time meeting his eyes but made herself. His nose was spotted with freckles that stood out against his pale skin. "Some good, some bad."

Sting's heart flopped annoyingly. He felt suddenly nervous. "I won't turn you away, Juvia. I don't know if I can be sweet, but I won't jerk you around. You'll always have a clear answer from me."

"Why are you telling me this, Sting?" She half wished he would stop. She mostly wished he'd continue. Tell her something sweet enough to make her teeth ache. He wasn't that kind of man, though.

"You and me are good together, Juvia." _I love you_. He couldn't make himself say it again, afraid she'd go away once more. "We don't have to complicate things, but…" He flicked his eyes up and found the other man hanging back in the bushes. Juvia didn't know he was there yet. Sting hoped, selfishly, that she wouldn't, either. He refocused on her and brushed back the damp hair from her forehead.

Juvia started shaking again when she realized what he was saying. "I don't think that's a good idea, Sting."

He bit back a sharp response and said, "Why not?"

Juvia worked her hands up between their bodies and smoothed back his shirt. He was just as soaked as she was now and the skin on his chest was hot. "I don't know. Gray…"

"Is so focused on himself, he can't think about you." He said the words purposefully, meanly, some part of him totally incapable of not being a bastard. "You've known that for awhile."

Juvia's muscles convulsed. _'It would be a lie_.' Gray had said it so deadpan, his expression so absolutely bland. How could she _not_ believe him?

Sting stooped and kissed her cheek, then the corner of her mouth. "I told you I'd be here to pick up what was left."

"Sting—"

He cut her words off with a real kiss. "We don't have to be perfect," he said when he pulled back. "We just have to work."

Juvia closed her eyes.

 _We don't have to be perfect._

Because they certainly weren't.

But they did work.

* * *

There had been a lot of lies Gray Fullbuster had told over the years to make things easier on himself. The first lie, the father of all of his lies, was that he didn't want Juvia Lockser, a sentiment made easier by her insistent appearances and strange shows of affection. The second lie, the enforcer, the bulldog if you will, was that she only wanted him because she couldn't have him, a theory he had just put to the test when he had given in and took what she had been putting up for auction for years. The third lie, the nail in the coffin of lies, was that he didn't love her, it was his stronghold, the stubborn last stance he had taken in keeping himself emotionally guarded, in keeping that hurt to a minimum. He thought he would have done anything in his power not to get attached. Now all the walls crumbled.

When it came to Juvia Lockser, Gray Fullbuster was weak.

It was easier, though, to put her first while he watched her and Sting together. The ash tree at his back held him upright, its thick branches and slowly turning leaves obscuring him from Juvia's sight. It wouldn't mask his smell, though. He felt sick to his stomach when Sting met his gaze. He couldn't look away, rooted in place. _'I'd be there to pick up the pieces.'_ And, _'So focused on himself, he can't think about you_.' Those words would follow him into sleep for a long, long time.

His father's mark pulsed coldly. Gray closed his eyes. _It's better this way_. He couldn't tell, though, if it were better, or if it were simply easier. He couldn't be in turmoil over Juvia if she was someone else's. He wouldn't wonder if her next breath would be her last because of him. He could focus on what was important. Destroying END so girls like her, girls with men that loved them, could go on living. Maybe one day she'd start a family. Maybe she'd live in a house with nice floors and clean walls, high counters and shining sinks. Maybe she'd bustle in through Sabretooth's halls, dodging people there to see the Master of Sabretooth and his blue haired naiad, the girl that the very sea obeyed. He imagined that she'd be safe and she'd be happy. She'd have everything life could offer. She'd be free.

Maybe she'd hurt for awhile.

Maybe she'd cry.

Maybe she'd close her eyes and think of him some cold night while the fire's dying embers wrought ghosts upon the floor. Maybe she'd think of him as another man made love to her.

But she'd be alive and well enough to think those things, and that's all he wanted.

The devil slayer's mark receded.

Gray turned, leaving Juvia in Sting's arms.

* * *

Painful, right? Sorry. I don't know why all of my endings are bitter-sweet. This hurt me after the last Fairy Tail chapter.

Ugh. Killed me, actually.

And it was short.

I swear, one day I'm going to write the sweetest Gruvia one-shot, just to prove that I can do something other than make them hurt.

Thanks for reading.

-Freyja


End file.
